Is my opinion on what is obese wrong?

[Thewheelweavesasthewheelwills]

This is me recently on a family day out at a big park which I was fit enough for.

I know I need to lose some weight and I have finally started to eat better. I got into a terrible habit of eating way too much chocolate when cluster feeding on the couch and didn't stop! I am now watching what I eat. I hate cal counting but I think I need to for a while to make myself accountable. I am aiming to lose about a stone.

Anyway, my app says I am obese. I would have said I was over weight yes but not obese. But I read on here a lot that we all have the wrong idea of what is overweight/ obese these days so maybe I was deluding myself?

YABU - you are obese, that is what it looks like
YANBU - you are not obese just a little fat

Is your BMI 30+? Doesn't look it.

Thanks everyone I have read all the comments.

I'm not saying BMI is a bad tool, just that I was shocked to be classed as obese. I do know it is a useful tool, crude as it is, it's a good starting point. Bar outliers it is a good indicator for most of us how we are. No I am not a body builder/ rugby player (although I did used to play at school/ very tall/ very large chested so I am not an outlier.

The height/ waste ratio is interesting I will aim for that.

I'm not entirely sure what I weighed at my 'happiest size' about 1 stone less than now which will still have me as over weight. But I was spinning twice a week and exercising 1 or 2 other times a week so would like to get back to that.

I mostly just want to be healthy, I have had pretty bad PN depression and am on the other side of that now, even though I'm not sure I will be unmedicated anytime soon. But I'm focussing on all that is good in life.

Going to the gym isn't really an option right now but I think I am going to try couch to 5k

Possibly a little overweight, but certainly not obese. Ignore the BMI scale as it is not a reliable indicator of overall health and fitness.

If you forget the BMI, being 5 foot 4 inches and weighing 13.5 stone is far far too heavy. I’m the same height and weight 10 stone 7 pounds and it’s much too heavy in my opinion. All my life I’ve been nine stone, but after kids I just can’t back to it, but if I’m honest, I really need to lose a stone before I head in to perimenopause. I know I would feel and look so much better.

Obese is not a moral judgment, it’s medical statistical and based entirely on height and weight

it does not define you as a person

This is why healthy BMI is a range rather than a number - to allow for different body shapes. So, for example, if two women are the same height but one has large boobs, you'd expect that one to weigh more and be at the higher end of the healthy range.

I saved the skirt I wore as part of my "going away" outfit (that's how long ago it was! ) mainly because it was so lovely, a classic black velvet pencil skirt which I wore with a red fluffy jumper, black velvet jacket and red fedora. But anyway, back to the skirt, it was a size 12 and a 24 inch waist. That was 35 years ago, I think it would be about a size 6 now. As for me, I am so bloody fat now that I doubt I could get my leg into it! I have battled with my weight on and off all my life, saw a recent photo of myself and I was horrified, I look horrible. Feeling a bit down about it, I have done Slimming World twice, lost loads and then slowly put it back on. Got told I was obese at the doctors, was in denial for a while and then somehow found the motivation to tackle it again and used MyFitness Pal. This was my most successful, I lost 25 pounds and felt great. Piled on loads during lockdown, I think food was the only thing that I felt I could rely on. Now I am wondering what to do to get the weight off yet again. So many of my friends are the same, lose the weight, gain it, lose it, gain on. Round and round the cycle goes.

I lost a stone when I stopped bf! I felt crap about my body in the first year post partum

I think that over the years we've become used to the sight of obese people, so what is obese (a BMI of above 30) has become fairly normal, in a way that someone a bit overweight (e.g. BMI 26) was several years ago.

I look back on my school gymnasts club photo (group of 9-11yo boys and girls in leotards and unitards) and I remembered which of the children we considered 'fat' at the time and they just look very very normal/ slim now but the "normal" size kids as we saw them then look really quite slim. Our perception of normal and healthy has changed drastically. This isn't a good or bad thing, it just shows how we do need an objective measure such as BMI as a starting point as perceptions change over time.

All my excess weight goes on my hips and thighs, I had a BMI of 31 but still had a 28 inch waist. Top half of my body, boobs, arms, waist and belly does not gain much weight, my thighs, bum and hips are where it tends to settle. Feel like I have been at war with my body for most of my life. I was a slender, bordering on thin young woman and still thought I was fat.

This. A key health risk of obesity is the additional pressure placed on your organs due to visceral fat and to your cardiovascular and respiratory system by having to work harder to move your excess weight around and pump blood around your larger body. Weightlifters and rugby players may be heavy, but they will also be more compact, as muscle is denser than fat, have low levels of visceral fat, and they’ll be doing frequent strenuous exercise, which improves cardiovascular and respiratory function, and thus is mitigatory. Which is why for BMI purposes, people who are heavy because they have high levels of body fat are not treated in the same way as people who are heavy because they have high levels of muscle.

It’s just not a moral judgement to be told you’re obese. It doesn’t mean you’re constantly stuffing cake and chips into your face all day and people are idiots if they think so; obesity tends to gradually creep up with most people over the years - just a few hundred calories a week too many that isn’t being burned off.

This is so true, I also have this body shape and unless I weigh around 55kg I look fat, it sucks to gain it on your tummy.

The BMI is a bit of a joke tbh. It doesnt take into account someone's fitness levels etc.. you can get athletes reading as obese due to muscle mass. I had a friend who was a uk size 12 and 5ft 7, who was obese according to bmi.. she very clearly was a fit and healthy person
Focus on your health and how you feel not on what the bmi says. Take your blood pressure and your heart rate. Make sure those are in a good place. Look at your activity levels. Make sure you are getting enough exercise and eating enough veg. Hopefully you will lose a bit of weight but even if you do not its not something you should fixate on. Being overweight increases your chances of illness but thats because it usually goes hand in hand with not eating enough veg and getting the nutrients you need, and inactivity. Its these things that cause most of the problems so address these things and the weight loss may or may not follow but you will be a lot healthier anyway.
I personally feel the point in my life where I was most healthy (I did the three peaks challenge and was regularly climbing mountains) I was actually overweight. At one point in my life I was a size 8 and barely had the energy to make it down the road.

This is so true, I have gained a load of weight and am in a bit of a state about it, then when I go out I see people far heavier than me and think to myself "why worry" but in truth I should worry and stop comforting myself by thinking "I'm not that bad".

clothes sizes are shit at measuring body size.
they are very inconsistent from item to item plus there is the very personal preference of more loose or more tight clothing.

I have clothes ranging from size 10-20 that all fit well at 5.9/11.5 stone, so in the middle of healthy bmi range.

and with regards to the high bmi body builder or rugby player - even if very fit and lean the excess weight puts a strain on the cardiovascular system and on the joints. that's not very healthy.

BMI isn't a joke because most of us are not professional athletes. These days it also takes into account different ethnicities. I need to have a lower BMI because I am not white British.

The point remains. I used to be 10/12 50 years ago, I am now size 8. Yet my weight has increased by half a stone in that period, and my waistline by 2 inches.

What a sweet baby in your picture! 😍

I ate metric tons of chocolate while breastfeeding, but the weight came off later. You've got to let your body guide you.

I am similar to your bmi 31 so obese. I accept I’m obese and need to lose weight. But yes from the pictures I’d say borderline obese. We’ve definitely lost sight of a normal healthy weight.

Its a medical definition, at a given threshhold you become Obese.
It is what it is, just a label/descriptor.

Lots of folk think its the "gigantosaws" waddling about who are obese, they are morbidly obese, you can be obese and not even look fat, being derived from BMI its a bit hit and miss anyway

I don't think you look obese. I'd say that you look towards the bigger-edge of normal.

I do like the little yellow cowboy hat, where can I get one of those...? 😏

I'm not sure about that. I have very small bones, my feet are 3.5 and my wrists are tiny. I am 5'5 and that seems to be all the calclulators take into account. I am not 'obese' according to the BMI calculator but I have loads of fat, particularly on my tummy and breasts so I would say I am in more danger than the OP.

It's a very very basic tool, like an alan key which you can't really use on many things but does work for a few things/ people. A multihead screwdriver would be a better tool!

Ugh, agreed. I have absolutely no arse or hips whether my BMI is 25 or 45 — at every weight I've been as an adult, women's jeans/trousers have billowed around the bum and thighs, so I've had to buy men's (which fit perfectly, apart from the length) and turn them up. But the cuts are obviously masculine, which is fine by me but many women wouldn't like.

It all just goes on my belly and tits, which aside from all the well-known fat distribution health implications, makes me really front-heavy! It hurts my back far more than if some of that extra weight was on my back end. And from a vanity POV, having extra weight on your hips and bum but a narrower waist tends to be easier to carry off (that magic sexy low waist to hip ratio) than having a thick middle.

This picture helps see what a healthy body shape looks like, and what obese looks like. Your body is like the obese one - again, no moral judgement, it just is what it is!

Judging by the photos I wouldn't describe you as either obese or fat. You look a bit overweight - maybe a stone or a stone and a half, but nothing serious. I think the meaning of the words has changed over time - when I was younger, people might be described as plump, or overweight, then fat. 'Obese' was the most extreme category and seldom used. People now rely on medical scales like BMI which puts the 'obese' threshold much lower.