To use the disabled bathroom when I’m not disabled?

[waterorsoda]

I promise this isn’t one of those questions where the OP asks something then argues with everyone that they are being reasonable etc when they’re not😆

My journey home from work has 2 parts to it. In between both journeys I always, without fail, need the bathroom. However I usually get around half an hour before closing so I usually jump in to the shopping centre and go to the toilet before the 2nd journey home as the traffic is bad and I need to go to the toilet anyway. However because they’re getting ready to close, the ladies toilets are ALWAYS closed off (as in, they are barricaded off as they are presumably being cleaned) but the disabled toilet is open. I usually just go to the disabled toilet but I always feel guilty because I shouldn’t really be using it. For context, I have an eye condition so very technically it’s an invisible disability but it’s not something that would make me usually need to use the disabled bathroom and I would always go to the ladies instead so I’m purely using the disabled because it’s the only one open. But I always feel guilty and feel like I shouldn’t be in there. It’s always quiet and nobody has ever had to wait for me but I’m always scared to come out in case someone says something or in case I’ve made someone who really needs the disabled toilet wait whilst I was in it.

am I ok to use it? Or should I not be doing it? There’s no other toilets nearby and unfortunately all coffee shops etc are closed so I couldn’t go there. The other toilets in the shopping centre are the exact same set up with the ladies being closed off😞

This is the definition of overthinking.
Just go to the toilet and stop worrying about it.

If the ladies are closed then what option do you have? Presumably you’re not in there for two hours preventing others using it?

Thank you! I was really hoping this was the case and that I wasn’t being a massive CF by using the toilets!

Be logical. Who are you harming in this scenario? You need a loo and the regular one isn't available so you're using the next best option. The only time you'd be unreasonable is if there were a queue of disabled people waiting for it.

Nope, I go in and out as quickly as I can as I’m scared in case anyone else is held up. I’ve just seen a few posts on here that it’s never ok and I started worrying I was being a CF!

My daugher is a wheelchair user and I wouldn't have an issue with this.

It's an accessible toilet that means people with disability issues can use it - I don'to think it means you can't use it if you haven't ?

Either way - if it's really quiet and you're really quick I might glance you up and down if we had to wait - but we are usually happy to wait a while.

I actaully think it's WAY worse when the baby change is in the accessible loo and you have to wait while some poor mum deals with a poonami!

Well you've got a choice use the mens, or the one that's opened, or wet yourself ?

Stop over thinking OP.

I do if it is the only one available, never had an issue, if I had kept a disabled person waiting I would apologise to them.

I would use it too and in the unlikely event of simeine challenging me,even if they were waiting,I would explain why.

I really wouldn’t worry, if perhaps there was someone who was disabled waiting when you came out, I’d be obliged to explain to them but everyone has disabilities, visible or not. Perhaps if there is a queue ensure the other people waiting have priority over yourself. Also with the ladies being closed off and by the sounds of it the shopping centre closing there probably aren’t as many people around and I don’t think you should have to hold it for a long period when you haven’t got ladies toilets available to you. I think it’s reasonable circs for you to use these toilets.

Presumably if it’s nearly closing time there’s not going to be hoards of people, so just have a quick look and see if anyone is heading toilet-wards first and if there’s no one obvious just go in and be quick

Sorry I didn’t mean ‘everyone has a disability’ I meant people have disabilities that aren’t aren’t visible, so nobody should make you feel you need to explain

Literally wouldn't think about this. You don't have another option. 🤷‍♀️

@alittlequinnie It's an accessible toilet that means people with disability issues can use it - I don'to think it means you can't use it if you haven't ?

Under normal circumstances that’s exactly what it means- disabled loos are for disabled people and no one else-

However, @waterorsoda I think in this situation you’re fine to use it- it’s that or wet yourself because they have closed all the other toilets.

My view on this is that disabled toilets are there to provide the extra facilities/space/safety requirements for disabled people. But not specifically FOR them only. I have and do use them if the non disabled ones aren’t available or even if there is a massive queue (obviously
not if disabled people are also queuing for it, but if it’s completely free). I see no issue with this.

I’m disabled and get the right hump when people post on here about using the disabled loo when they aren’t disabled (always with a crappy excuse) but even moany old me wouldn’t have a problem with this. If the he ladies are closed then of course you should use the disabled ones and I certainly wouldn’t want any woman forced to use the men’s instead.

Ask whoever is cleaning the ladies' if there are any other toilets you can use - I bet they'll point you at the disabled one.

I've not read that, but if I see a disabled loo, and no people waiting to use it, and I need a wee, I use it. I only take about 60 seconds. Even if a person with a disability is waiting when I get out, I just don't think it matters.

You don’t think it matters?! So a amenity is provided for people who are disabled and are UNABLE to use any other toilet, to try and make disabled people able to actually go to places; and you are entitled and ignorant enough to think that you can just use it if you don’t fancy waiting?!

If Ladies are closed and no disabled person waiting to go I think just nip in wee and nip out. You haven't really got a choice in this situation.

@Soggysoggydew Yeah 60 waiting is perfectly fine in my view yes.

*seconds

Accessible toilets are exactly that- accessible. They are not for the exclusive use of people with disabilities. You don’t need to feel guilty for using one and no one should be expressing any disapproval when you do.

They are not for the exclusive use of disabled people. You have no right to berate someone for using one if it’s vacant.

Theres a lot more 'im not disabled but this is convenient for me so ill just be quick' people than there are disabled people who actually can ONLY use the accessible facility.

So if everyone thinks like that, some of us do end up waiting, very frequently, for the toilet - we also end up waiting a long time when another disabled person is using it, meaning we can wait way longer for the ONE loo we can use, than a non disabled person might.

SO yeah, um, since your need for the loo is SO predictable, couldn't you go at work before you leave? Finish work, have a wee, then set off home?

The piss-taking use of accessible toilets is one reason why so many are locked, meaning some of us have to go, like little children, and find someone to effectively, take us to the toilet or give us permission to go, and yes you can buy your own RADAR key but many places have fitted the locks 'incorrectly' on purpose, which means if you're in there having used your own key, the door can still be opened by someone else with the RADAR key (they do this so they can unlock it easily from the outside if its locked on the inside. it is not an accident.)