Email sent by colleagues addressed to 'Gents'

[funkymonkey55]

AIBU to be annoyed by a male colleague starting an email chain to other male colleagues where he addresses them as "Gents" and then he loops me in a few days later - when the actions around the original email topic (gathering information together) need to be picked up (by me of course!)?

It annoys me because I feel 1) I should have been cc'd in the first instance, 2) Isn't starting an email chain where you know females will have to be cc'd in / included with the phrase Gents a little rude?

I don't know if I am being a bit overly sensitive.

Anyone saying anyone was snowflakey would be in trouble in my line of work. Likewise anyone who think it’s “lol”.

Pisses me off.

DD plays in an all boys U12 football team and the coaches still say ‘well done lads’ ‘right listen up boys’ etc.

Twats

But that's a completely different situation. In the OP's story all the people addressed as 'gents' were male. I've underlined this because it's a really important point which many people seem to be missing.

I'm also slightly confused by those saying it was sexist/misogynistic for the OP not to be included in the original email. There are 1001 situations in a workplace where one person might need to be made aware of a communication which was entirely appropriately addressed to one or more colleagues and not to them. Unless the OP has explains the specifics of the content of the email (which would almost certainly not be appropriate on a public forum) nobody has any way of knowing whether this was okay here or not.

One useful thing I am taking away from this thread is that a fair few posters feel that any gendered language in the workplace is inappropriate. I can't quite get my head round this personally - as far as I can tell addressing Jim and Mike as "Jim and Mike" would exclude Mary just as much as calling them "Gents" would exclude her. And indeed, excluding others who aren't being addressed is appropriate and the whole point of using any form of address - it delineates the group being spoken or written to and distinguishes them from any others who are present or who may see the message. But it's common enough for people to find "gents" problematic that I'll be trying hard to avoid using language like this at work in future.

So it's not all boys?

I personally wouldn't reply to emails addressing 'gents' because I'm not a gent

Most people aren’t maliciously trying to sabotage their colleagues.

No, they're not. (Though there are those who do.) But it can be done unconsciously by always defaulting to male, only remembering there's a woman in the team as an afterthought. As some said upthread, it's othering and divisive - even if it isn't deliberate. That's how unconscious bias works. None of these things on their own matter, but they all add up - death by 1000 cuts.

It sounds as though the colleague who wrote this is flexing his muscles and those of his male colleagues, to try out the possibility of a new dynamic with the replacement manager who is less pro woman. Its a power thing, as ever.
Would HR help with sexism in the office?