...to want my baby born in September (not August)?

[chickpea1982]

I'd be really interested to hear other Mumsnetters' experiences on this question.

I'm currently pregnant with DC3, who is due on 31 August. My plan was to try to hold on until 1 September (unless the baby decides otherwise!) so DC3 is born in September and so is the oldest/one of the oldest in her year. It feels to me like it could make such a big difference to her life - either the oldest in her year, or the absolute youngest. Or am I overthinking things?

The doctors want to induce at 39 weeks as I have gestational diabetes, but I'm not completely convinced it's necessary, or that waiting a few extra days will make much difference.

Looking forward to receiving your wisdom!

It’s my birthday tomorrow. I was always the youngest in my school year. I sailed through the 11+, got a university place when only 5% of the population were graduates and was sufficiently successful in my career to be a higher tax payer for most of it. It makes zero difference whether you’re born in August or September.

You need to listen to the professionals to keep you and your baby safe

I was born at the end of August and then passed my 11 + a year early, so went up to secondary school just after my tenth birthday. I didn’t notice the age difference until some of my friends became 17 and could learn to drive. I ‘m still close friends with the oldest girl in my class who is over 2 years older than me. I ‘m not sure when this worry about having a baby in August started but no one gave it a thought when I was a child.

@Blossomtoes it made zero difference to you. That's an anecdote. The research base is that at a population level the evidence shows that there are statistically significant differences in the outcomes of children born in August and they're disadvantages.
OP nothing you can do about this one I'm afraid, health of you and baby now are more important. And as the anecdotes that other posters will provide shows that there are always people who buck the trend.

Me too, Chickpea, Russell group uni. Followed by successful professional career.

No idea why you picked on me when the entire thread’s stuffed with anecdata. 🤷‍♀️

There are advantages and disadvantages to being the oldest. I was a 'free' reader by the age of 6, as I whizzed my way through all of the set books, so I got to pick my own books from the library during reading hour. It also meant I'd be bored sometimes, because I was ahead of a lot of my schoolmates. Luckily we had a teacher who would take us for extracurricular lessons, where we'd study Greek/Roman/Norse mythology and Latin

I’m glad my DD missed the year above her. She’s a September baby, and has had an extra boost in nursery before she starts Reception this year. She definitely wasn’t ready for Reception this time last year because socially and academically she was behind the children who were months and months older than her.

It’s unimaginable that if she was born just slightly earlier, she would be starting Year 1 now! That blows my mind. She’s just finished nursery now which seems right.

As someone who had GD, as others have said, just listen to your doctor. My child came at 37 +2 so you never know what will happen. I was going to be induced like you.

Also have had a summer born - now he's in KS2 it's not noticed at all, not that it ever was apart from the teacher saying he's the 2nd youngest in the year and doing just fine. Have more faith in their ability and don't assume just because they're born in August they'll fail. Utter rubbish how much stigma is put on it.

My friends DD was an August baby. She was always top of her class and never struggled. It was probably a good thing she was born early (as was due in September) because I imagine she would have been bored and frustrated being in the year below. She's now off at uni and doing well.

She’s not being silly: there are statistics to support her concerns. She’s trying to weigh up what’s best for her baby.

Do what your doctor says! Gestational diabetes babies tend to be large, and my obstetrician did a c-section at 38 weeks, because in the last two weeks the baby would've put on a pound a week. As it was he was almost 10 pounds. That's very dangerous to both mother and baby. Follow medical advice!

You are being absolutely ridiculous, let the health of you and the baby come first.

One of my DC is 31st August and is due to start school next year. We haven't decided whether to defer or not yet but I like that we the option either way if we want it.
My eldest is an early September baby and therefore did 2 years of pre school and was totally bored and unchallenged by the end so I'm leaning towards sending DC2 next year.

So the doctors treating you have advised you to be induced by a certain date because of a condition that could, if delivery is delayed, potentially cause harm to your unborn child, and you're asking a bunch of non medically qualified, strangers on MN, whether you should hold on for a few more days so your child won't be one of the youngest in the school year?

Dear god.

Research shows that, actually, it does matter - quite a lot!

Just because in your very limited example it was all OK, doesn't mean that's the case for other summer born children. Anecdata is not real data!

I taught in a very academic, selective girls' school for years. Looking at the birth dates of each year group it was noticeable that the September to March birthdays were a significant majority, especially September to December, by at least ⅔rds to ⅓rd. It was the same every year.
No age allowance was made when they took the entrance exams so some were almost a year younger but didn't get credit for that.

My experience as a parent was the early October one was streets ahead on starting school compared with his late May (and 7 weeks early) brother who took time to settle. But individual children are different, of course.

You won't have a choice though, OP. Your baby's safety is obviously more important.

Both mine were late August babies, DS1 very academic and always well ahead of many older children. DS2 mild learning difficulties as well as a late birthday so some concerns around when he was aged 7-8 but had a little extra help from a kind TA so was level pegging by Year 6 and ended up with more GCSEs than his brother! They find their own route in life, and your baby’s health is the most important thing.

And OP, I had similar worries for my DS, due in mid-August but actually born mid-July. We found delaying his school start was very straightforward, and it was absolutely the right decision for him. There's a Facebook group called Flexible Admission for Summer Borns which has a huge wealth of info on the topic, have a look.

Even if your child seems ready for school at just turned 4, it's still a gamble sending them - social skills are every bit as important as academics, and being young for their year can impact them all the way through school. The maturity gap can seem wider at different ages.

YANBU.
Cue lots of anecdotal evidence about individual August born children because people don’t understand averages.
Children youngest in the school year are disadvantaged. In the UK this means those with June - August birthdays. The affect narrows as they get older, but is still there at GCSE. See here for more.
https://www.cambridgeassessment.org.uk/Images/109784-birthdate-effects-a-review-of-the-literature-from-1990-on.pdf

It’d be lovely to be able to plan this and I can understand your concerns, but as others have said, you have to put the health and safety of your baby and you first. Also, you will likely have very little choice. My daughter was due in October and actually born two months early in August. Obviously I’d have preferred her to have been born in Oct so she was one of the oldest in her year, and would have definitely preferred for her not to have needed to be born via emergency c-section and to have the associated month in NICU, but ultimately, for hers and my health, she needed to be born early at 32 weeks and in August. Sending you good luck for whenever baby arrives.

Sure, and if the thread were “Should I tactically TTC to have a September/October baby?” then people saying that it matters a lot would be fine. But this thread is “Should I risk my health and that of my unborn baby because I’m worried they’ll be the youngest in the class?”, which makes that sort of response tactless at best and potentially dangerous at worst.

In my ante natal group with DC 1 a few mums were hoping their babies were late. I was surprised because I hadn't really thought about it.

My DD is August born and has never struggled academically, she got all 8s and 9s in GCSEs but I know if my DS had started school at the same age as her he would have found it a lot more difficult, especially to begin with. He had speech delay and things like dressing himself, using a pencil or scissors were a bit later.

In terms of holding out, I think you'd have to be guided by both baby themselves and medical practitioners

My August due baby came in September and I was really pleased. Not that he's done any better in school, I just felt like my other baby born late July was far too tiny for school!

OP just take the induction date and defer if you want baby to be in the next school year instead.

My child is the 30th August, I knew nothing about deferring or any of the research about disadvantaged summer babies and stuck him in the school year he was meant to be in. He's the youngest in his year and particularly in his class we he's in with the September- January born kids but he's flying at school. I genuinely can't imagine keeping him back in preschool for another year when he went to reception, he'd have been bored out of his mind.

Listen to the health professionals and make sure you get baby here safely before worrying about other things. I didn't have GD but did have placenta deterioration related to something else, it was undetected and I went a few days past due date before ending up with a crash c section when my baby's heart flatlined during labour. It was terrifying and I'm forever grateful that she's well.