is this affordable?

[mellysq]

Income 3,500 (net)
Mortgage 1,100
CT 150
Car finance and loan repayment 300
Nursery 1,400

I am so incredibly stressed. I really don’t know whether to just give up work and rely on savings for a while (currently have 15k so won’t last long) and then take a lower paid job and have more time with dc. She’s not entitled to any free hours so that’s the cost including the tax free element. No idea what to do or what is best anymore.

We pay £1,600 p/m for 4 days a week in Zone 2.

I don’t understand how you’d live off the savings if you quit. Universal credit will not pay your mortgage for you, so unless you sell your house and move into rented then the only cost you’d save by quitting work is £1400 nursery. Even if you get some UC that pays for everything else, you’d need to pay your mortgage of £1100 from savings so it would only last about 14 months. Then what would you do?

i agree with pp that you need to just hold tight and use savings to subsidise nursery fees until you get some funding. If the new childcare policy does come in then 2 year olds will be entitled to 15 hours funding from April 2024 and from sept 2025 it will be 30 hours from 9 months. Any money you do get from ex you put back in savings to continue to subsidise nursery fees.

It may also be cheaper to look into a childminder or a nanny share. Or have you thought about requesting compressed hours so you save a days fees per week?

I was just about to suggest those too. People usually think a nanny is only for the rich, but it can often be cheaper as a share.

Move your mortgage to interest only, or increase the term. You should be able to do this easily with the recent changes. If you can’t for some reason then go to a broker. The fee will be worth it for the long term.

Speak to your work (assuming you are not in your first 2 years of employment). Ask for a pay rise. See if you could work compressed hours to reduce the number of days you need.

Alternatively could you change to another employer for a pay rise. Although I would use this as a last resort due to the lack of protection for employees now.

Or, if you work from home could you move to a cheeper if the country, even if just for a couple of years? Or, could you rent out your current house and you rent somewhere cheeper, using the difference as income (watch out for conditions in the mortgage here).

Do you have a spare room? Could you let it out to a female lodger?

How old is your DC? Wouldn’t you be better staying in work and dipping into your savings if necessary? Or could you possibly downsize the house and reduce/ get rid of the mortgage? I doubt your savings and any benefits would cover your mortgage for very long. Could your partner do some childcare in the week? Or could you compress your hours to save a days childcare.

My immediate reaction is that it’s tight but do-able.

Could you take in a lodger? Or do a live in au pair?

Similar to ours. We're using savings to top it up until the free hours.

It’s a while since I’ve had to do it, so I might be out of touch with the prices, but I would look into finding a child minder who is reputable. They will be almost certainly much cheaper than the nursery fees and will free some money up.

Thanks for the suggestions. Feeling very sad about it all. Last year our energy bills were crazy and I will probably be in debt paying that again this year. All feels pointless.

I know it feels pointless for now but the nursery bill won't be forever. You're best using tiny bits of savings if needed instead of coming out of this 2 years from now with nothing left in your savings and no job! Hold tight, the younger years are financially hard.

You simply can't afford that nursery, you need to look for a childminder or au pair for even some of the week if you want the benefits of nursery. Could you work from home full time with an au pair in the house?

If you earned less I could see why you'd consider it but you earn a good wage and maintaining that good wage will mean once nursery fees are over, you'll be in a comfortable position. If you quit your job in 3 years time I think you'd massively regret it.

Nursery fees aren't forever. Yes it will be tight but with your 15k savings too, I think manageable. Once you're through nursery, you'd have an extra 1400 a month (minus wraparound care ) to build back your savings. Honestly think you'd be crazy to quit your job. You need to think long term not short.

You earn a good wage so don’t give that up. See this as an investment in your future career. Quitting isn’t a solution, what are you going to do once the savings run out?

@sleepyscientist already work from home 4 out of 5 days a week

Similar to me!! It's so stressful juggling all of this!! Don't quite your job now but perhaps look to move to an employer with better hours or workload

Use savings for nursery or to split cost of nursery- it won't be forever!

Get insurance for house stuff like boiler so no surprises there.

Strictly no meals out, unlesss fun money comes in.

Any maintenance that does come in is for fun stuff maybe do another bank account for that.

Is it possible to compress hours at work eg a 0.9 week into four days to avoid one day at nursery?

There is an end in sight to these expensive years

@mellysq what about food, bills, insurance, petrol, broadband, Tv, clothes, phone etc?

What about a childminder rather than nursery? That looks very tight, but not working and living off savings doesn’t sound good either.

Grit your teeth and get through it. Free hours will kick in before too long, and then they start school and it gets easier again

I had to pay mortgage plus childcare for two and it was grim and i skipped meals (ex rarely paid his maintenance) but I am so glad I kept working. A few promotions later and with minimal childcare costs now I am in such a different position financially.

How would stopping work solve anything?

You'd get rid of nursery bill but not your other costs, and you'd have no money coming in at all plus losing pension etc. What would you live off? You won't just get given benefits to cover everything indefinitely - you'll come under pressure to seek work sooner than you think.

The childcare years are temporary. Cut any spending you can, accept that you'll need to chug through your savings to cover the leanest years and do everything you can to progress at work.

Could you work from home full time with an au pair in the house?

You can't use an au pair as full time childcare!! They only get paid pocket money for LIGHT childcare duties (this means things like a bit of wraparound for school aged kids). Don't be one of the arseholes who abuses au pairs by using them as cheap childcare and failing to pay them minimum wage, its a scummy scummy thing to do.

You have £15k in savings, you aren’t going to be in debt paying your heating bill.
You need to reframe your thinking.

I just don't get how you think stopping work helps. Where will you get money from, the magic money tree?!

Most people living solely on benefits would give their right arm for a decently paid job & 15k of savings to get them through the worst couple of childcare years.

Also - your nursery is expensive. Childminders are much cheaper - look for a childminder. Many don't charge you when they are on holiday so you can match your holidays with theirs and save a month or so of cost each year.

How old is dd

If you go back after ml you have 2yrs of full fees

The £1400 that's a month for how many days so what is it per day

A cm may be cheaper

You say you can't extend mortgage - can you see if can have a 3/6mth break while she is young to help with childcare costs

Have you checked with uc to see if get any help with childcare costs or any uc

You haven't added child benefit so that's an extra £90 a month

Or pay less into pension for a year