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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Telling someone on holiday that they're sunburnt

75 replies

Wahwahwahwahwah · 01/08/2023 13:29

We're on Crete at the moment and it's HOT. I've seen a lot of very burnt people. Today we were by the pool and a very fair / blond haired girl aged probably about 15 or 16 was asleep on a sunbed on full sun. Her back was already very red. Her family were nearby (which is my excuse) but basically I'm British so decided to mind my own business but should I have woken her? Do you think it's the decent thing to do? Or would it piss you off if someone did that?

OP posts:
Thatboymum · 01/08/2023 13:31

I would mind my own business because it’s not my responsibility or problem the family were stupid enough to let their child sleep and burn in full sun personally.

Cas112 · 01/08/2023 13:36

I would get irritated if a random woman I didn't know woke me up to tell me to put sun cream on or get out of the sun

Annaishere · 01/08/2023 13:41

I would appreciate it

DinnaeFashYersel · 01/08/2023 13:43

If I had fallen asleep and was burning I would be very grateful to be told.

Batbatbatty · 01/08/2023 13:44

Oh lord, people are daft.
The only safe tan is a fake tan.

I can't say whether you should have said anything or not, I wouldn't but feel like I should?

Hermanfromguesswho · 01/08/2023 13:45

I would appreciate it. My children are currently in Crete with their father and his partner. They have a different style of parenting to me. My teens/pre teens are neuro diverse and I know that one of them has already got badly sunburned from speaking to him.
Id very much appreciate strangers helping them to keep themselves safe as they struggle to do it independently!

YetAnotherSpartacus · 01/08/2023 13:45

I have in the past and have been told to F Off.

RitzyMcFitzy · 01/08/2023 13:46

I'd appreciate being woken if I'd fallen asleep in the sun and was obviously burning.

Cheesusisgrate · 01/08/2023 13:48

I am not sure how so many people in a literate countries, so they can read, cannot comprehend sun exposure=suncream needed. People have UV levels on basic weather phone apps🙄

I would also not say anything. Wouldn't want to end up in argument on holidays

SamW98 · 01/08/2023 13:49

YetAnotherSpartacus · 01/08/2023 13:45

I have in the past and have been told to F Off.

I had same. A charming woman in Kos when I mentioned her son (aged about 12) years as going red told he ‘that’s his problem not yours so butt out’

TheGoodBanana · 01/08/2023 13:49

I think I would have mentioned to the parents, oh your daughter is burning there, then they could throw a towel over her/move a parasol/wake her up as appropriate.

CurlewKate · 01/08/2023 13:56

I would absolutely say something. I can't understand why you wouldn't.

BillaBongGirl · 01/08/2023 13:59

I would have said something. Lots of people can’t tell they are burning and in all the times I’ve spoken up, everyone has been genuinely thankful. No one has been frosty or gotten a mind your own business attitude.

ArcticSkewer · 01/08/2023 14:00

Does it really matter if someone tells you to eff off? It's not a big deal. I'd risk it and wake someone up if they were going really red. Melanoma kills. Words don't.

Zebedee999 · 01/08/2023 14:04

I would definitely appreciate it. It's easy enough to ignore your advice if that's what I want to do.

Mind you the last time I "poked my nose in" was when a Pakistani origin 18 year old in my office married his 14 year old cousin in Pakistan. When I mentioned that to management as to what I should do I was told I was being racist to think it unacceptable. So I do tend to keep quiet nowadays. But I don't mind people giving me unsolicited advice which I can ignore as I see fit.

Zebedee999 · 01/08/2023 14:05

SamW98 · 01/08/2023 13:49

I had same. A charming woman in Kos when I mentioned her son (aged about 12) years as going red told he ‘that’s his problem not yours so butt out’

Show quote history

Why on earth are people lik ethat? Always so aggressive straight from the off.

HarrietJet · 01/08/2023 14:05

Cas112 · 01/08/2023 13:36

I would get irritated if a random woman I didn't know woke me up to tell me to put sun cream on or get out of the sun

You sound quite unintelligent, then, if you'd rather burn on obliviously.

WhateverMate · 01/08/2023 14:08

If someone woke me and said, "Hi, sorry, just a bit concerned you've nodded off and don't realise you're burning".

I'd have no problem with that.

DeckingTheHalls · 01/08/2023 14:08

A tanned skin is a damaged skin, as they say. So few people understand how dangerous sunburn can be, and how deadly melanoma can be.
Having said all that, if it was a stranger I wouldn’t say anything. If it was friends or family I absolutely would. But like previous posters have experienced, I’d be worried I was going to get a mouthful from a horrible individual and that’s not what you want on holiday!

Liz1tummypain · 01/08/2023 14:10

I'd appreciate it. Sunburn is flipping painful and I'd want to be spared it if possible.

SirenSays · 01/08/2023 14:10

Wouldn't bother me. When I went to do a house sit the lady saw I was sunburnt and before I knew it she was chopping up an aloe plant to rub all over me.

Fbshe · 01/08/2023 14:11

I have quite red skin naturally. On my last holiday I was told constantly by strangers that I was looking burnt, I wasn’t burnt. I also had several people make jokes because they assumed it was sunburn. It just made me feel pretty shitty. One older woman spent the afternoon tutting at me because I didn’t take her advice to put on more cream and sit in the shade, I had put factor 50 on moments before but she looked like leather. I would mind my business.

KimberleyClark · 01/08/2023 14:16

I remember when I was working people coming back from their holidays lobster coloured and other people would say “You look well!”

Only fucking idiots let themselves get burned.

Hayley0203 · 01/08/2023 14:22

Fbshe · 01/08/2023 14:11

I have quite red skin naturally. On my last holiday I was told constantly by strangers that I was looking burnt, I wasn’t burnt. I also had several people make jokes because they assumed it was sunburn. It just made me feel pretty shitty. One older woman spent the afternoon tutting at me because I didn’t take her advice to put on more cream and sit in the shade, I had put factor 50 on moments before but she looked like leather. I would mind my business.

This.

Wednesdaysotherchild · 01/08/2023 14:25

KimberleyClark · 01/08/2023 14:16

I remember when I was working people coming back from their holidays lobster coloured and other people would say “You look well!”

Only fucking idiots let themselves get burned.

I get burnt if I leave the house, even in factor 50! I’ve been sunburnt within a lunch-hour on a cloudy day in January, some of us can’t avoid it without the full burka approach.