Page 3 | Telling someone on holiday that they're sunburnt

Spendonsend · 01/08/2023 17:44

I'd be delighted if you let me know I was burning or offered me suncream or spotted my kids were burning.

I fell asleep on a beach once and burned my legs horribly. It did ruin the rest of my holiday and I am suspicious skin cancer awaits.

HalloumiLuvver · 01/08/2023 18:04

ArcticSkewer · 01/08/2023 14:00

Does it really matter if someone tells you to eff off? It's not a big deal. I'd risk it and wake someone up if they were going really red. Melanoma kills. Words don't.

Yes this. I wouldn't care if I got a bit of attitude. But I might get thanks and save someone a lot of pain.

LlynTegid · 01/08/2023 18:25

I'd be happy to be warned, and if I warned someone else I would not care if they were upset.

Gerwurtztraminer · 01/08/2023 18:54

I was on holiday with a friend who's had melanoma. Caught in time luckily.

She warned someone they were burning - just "did you know" and they got humpy back. So she turned around, pointed at the huge scar at the top of her calf behind her knee, (it really looks like a shark took a bite out of her leg) and said, "well up to you but this is what can happen if you burn".

Woman's face was a picture.

Hollyppp · 01/08/2023 19:53

I would always say something. I can’t bare to see burnt people and I would just shrug it off if people were rude by knowing I did the right thing

natura · 01/08/2023 19:59

I'd really appreciate it.

I also go red before I go brown, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

And I'd find it really reassuring that society hasn't gone so far away from communities looking out for one another than we'll just let everyone get hurt for fear of repercussions.

But I know that's not the case for everyone.

I think in cases like these I always ask myself: "if society worked the way I'd like it to work, what would I do?" Be the change, and all that.

I do get what people are saying about being constantly told things that aren't relevant – but if it's 'in service of a greater good', I can suck up a few inconvenient conversations.

LaCerbiatta · 01/08/2023 20:03

The UK has non existent education or awareness of sun protection. People think that keeping cool by the pool / sun cream / some shade are all that's needed to protect themselves. The other day there was a thread here on how to survive Greece in the heatwave and people were recommending to take extra sun cream 🙄.

The safe way to be in the sun is to be INDOORS between 12am and 4pm, not in the pool, not at the beach under a shade. I despair when I see the brits go to the beach /pool at 11 and then shower up for dinner at 5pm!....

GreyTS · 01/08/2023 20:06

My mind is absolutely blown by the amount of people that admit that they burn in any amount of sun exposure but still do it! I would literally cover myself head to toe and avoid the sun completely if there was any possibility of burning. No matter where I holiday you can always spot British and irish families, fair freckled skin burnt bright red, the damage must be horrendous

Missingmyusername · 01/08/2023 20:10

I would appreciate it. I fell asleep once when I was 21. I burned my back so badly it bled, skin was black and peeled off.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 01/08/2023 20:13

I have rosacea and I am sick to death of people telling me I am sunburnt, particularly when they argue with me when I try to tell them it’s something else.

It’s ironic because I am one of the most sun avoidant people I know.

If you MUST go up to strangers and make personal comments about their skin I implore you don’t make it worse when they demur by saying ‘But you look really red!’

isthismylifenow · 01/08/2023 20:22

Perhaps they did speak to their dd, but 14/15 year olds are notoriously defiant.

I worked at a Spanish holiday resort for a British company for few years. In the introduction we always mentioned about being in the sun and burning and how dangerous it can be. Mentioned the hours to try avoid the heat of the day etc. And fairly often were told to stfu and not tell people how they should spend their holiday.

Also made many a trip with holidaymakers to hospital for medical emergencies due to severe sunburn, heatstroke etc.

Some people would appreciate it being mentioned. But some will not.

SquirrelFan · 01/08/2023 20:55

I fell asleep in the sun as a teenager and my friend didn't wake/tell me. I had a terrible sunburn and spent most of the next few days in a cool bath. She said later, 'oh, I thought you were getting a bit red...' 🙄
I would definitely tell the person, even at the risk of being given an earful.

Lavenderandbrown · 01/08/2023 21:02

I would not say anything. It’s well known re: sunburn risks aging skin cancer and yet many people squinting sunning burning and baking themselves. My coworker burned her face multiple times a summer while watching her children’s sports. She was complimented on “got some color”. Her face peeled! 45 years old and peeling patches off her cheeks and nose. She knew I was a sunscreen hat no exposure advocate and I felt she was waiting for me to comment but I didn’t. Burn away I say if you don’t care I don’t need to either

Dovetail40 · 01/08/2023 21:02

Wahwahwahwahwah · 01/08/2023 13:29

We're on Crete at the moment and it's HOT. I've seen a lot of very burnt people. Today we were by the pool and a very fair / blond haired girl aged probably about 15 or 16 was asleep on a sunbed on full sun. Her back was already very red. Her family were nearby (which is my excuse) but basically I'm British so decided to mind my own business but should I have woken her? Do you think it's the decent thing to do? Or would it piss you off if someone did that?

Would be 100% grateful if you yold me or my family.

Skin cancer is so deadly and some advice could save a life and heartache.

fivelilducks · 01/08/2023 21:58

Annaishere · 01/08/2023 13:41

I would appreciate it

Me too, I have bubbled up without realising before. The pain was horrendous

Jakadaal · 01/08/2023 22:32

If her family were nearby I wouldn't intervene. I have fair skin and wear all day factor 50, a hat, stay in the shade during the hottest part of the day etc. last year in Greece a very tanned German lady kept pointing at me in the swimming pool commenting on my colour! I wasn't burnt but tend to go deep red then fade. I was very embarrassed how she drew attention to me. I retreated under my hat and parasol. I'm not sure she was being solicitous to be honest.

So in reply to your query I would not intervene - but if someone was by themselves and clearly asleep I might clomp past loudly in flip flops to try and wake them up!

Zebedee999 · 02/08/2023 09:14

GiraffeLaSophie · 01/08/2023 14:48

Did he bring her back to the UK?

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Yes, I don't know how as some say it's impossible but once married at 14 she was brought over to live here in London. She'd call the office and ask for him by name, I'd say he was at lunch, she just repetitively said his name as she wasn't allowed to learn any English until I just put the phone down. I'd suggest to him to teach her English but he said she didn't need to as she wasn't allowed out without him. I said "but what if she wants to go to the dr", he said that he'd go with her. I assume she is still a house prisoner now some 20 years later and still not speaking English. He was an otherwise lovely lad, albeit very naieve and dim. But I'd not try and riase this again as no one took any interest aside from calling me racist for not accepting such cultures. Same happened with Rotherham Police and the grooming gangs. It's best to just mind your own business.

GiraffeLaSophie · 02/08/2023 13:14

Zebedee999 · 02/08/2023 09:14

Yes, I don't know how as some say it's impossible but once married at 14 she was brought over to live here in London. She'd call the office and ask for him by name, I'd say he was at lunch, she just repetitively said his name as she wasn't allowed to learn any English until I just put the phone down. I'd suggest to him to teach her English but he said she didn't need to as she wasn't allowed out without him. I said "but what if she wants to go to the dr", he said that he'd go with her. I assume she is still a house prisoner now some 20 years later and still not speaking English. He was an otherwise lovely lad, albeit very naieve and dim. But I'd not try and riase this again as no one took any interest aside from calling me racist for not accepting such cultures. Same happened with Rotherham Police and the grooming gangs. It's best to just mind your own business.

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Oh, I didn’t realise it was 20 years ago. If it does happen again (hopefully it won’t) then the police or social services should be interested!

CrazyFrogDingDing · 02/08/2023 13:28

I once had an American lady tell me that my back was burning when I was on holiday, in the most marvelous southern drawl.
I appreciated her concern and we ended up having a lovely conversation.
I would tell someone with as much tact as I could that they were possibly burning. If I get abuse in return, well there's nothing I can do about it, but hopefully they would be ok with it.

mauveiscurious · 02/08/2023 20:21

I was once in Greece where a family had a baby and toddler in full sun and were red burnt. God knows how the baby got on later that day.

bellac11 · 02/08/2023 20:34

Gerwurtztraminer · 01/08/2023 18:54

I was on holiday with a friend who's had melanoma. Caught in time luckily.

She warned someone they were burning - just "did you know" and they got humpy back. So she turned around, pointed at the huge scar at the top of her calf behind her knee, (it really looks like a shark took a bite out of her leg) and said, "well up to you but this is what can happen if you burn".

Woman's face was a picture.

Im not surprised it was a 'picture'

No one knows what on earth other people have had in their lives previously or what experiences, medical history etc

It certainly wouldnt be well received by me but Im too polite to say anything so my face would be a picture too no doubt

What other medical conditions do people think they've got the right to imply someone might get if they dont change what thet're doing, lung cancer, obesity, bad teeth

I might go up to people eating burgers and ask them if they know they're eating fat and carbohydrates in excess and you'll get fat just like me (flashes massive stomach)

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 02/08/2023 21:08

The thing is people are often convinced you are burning when you’re actually red for another reason.

You would think that if you explained people would be like ‘oh right, sorry’ but in my experience they’re not- they are more likely to dig their heels in and go ‘no, you’re definitely burning, you’re really red.’ If someone then proceeded to lecture me about melanomas my face would be a picture too.

KnittedCardi · 03/08/2023 22:00

Thing is would you point out to random people:

You're smoking
You're drinking alcohol
You're fat

No, but all high risk for cancer.

natura · 03/08/2023 22:26

KnittedCardi · 03/08/2023 22:00

Thing is would you point out to random people:

You're smoking
You're drinking alcohol
You're fat

No, but all high risk for cancer.

Sure, but which of those is as likely to cause intense pain and discomfort in the next 6 hours, and potentially ruin their holiday and the following weeks?

To try on the alternate version of the 'but would you' game: would you not point out to someone if they were about to put their hand in a fire? Fall off a cliff? Slip in a puddle they hadn't seen and hurt their ankle?

Flibbertigibbettytoes · 03/08/2023 22:45

HarrietJet · 01/08/2023 17:38

If somebody had told me on holiday, whilst she was (admittedly, very) red that she was sunburnt I would have been sorely tempted to tell them to fuck off
But why? Why is aggression like this your starting point instead of a simple "It's ok, she's just hot"?
I know you don't owe a complete stranger an explanation but there's no way they deserve a "fuck off" either. Are you happy to model that behaviour to your 10 year old?

Exactly this - why is aggression the default?

I'm pale and get red easily. No-one has ever suggested I was burning but I have been asked if I'm ok at park run as I go bright red even when feeling the pace is pretty comfortable. It's a bit embarrassing but I just say I go red because I'm pale and no-one has pushed it.