AIBU to think this car park should ONLY be for mothers?

[HuwsLineIsItAnyway]

Our local big hospital has a maternity unit.

There is one small car park in immediate proximity to the maternity unit. No other departments have an entrance from this car park.

There are three large car parks on site but all are either on the other side of the hospital or the next closest to the maternity unit means climbing a massive hill to the Mat unit.
Every single time I've been here - both in this pregnancy and my previous ones - the small car park is chock full of visiting relatives, leaving a number of heavily pregnant and postpartum mums to either have to navigate the entire hospital or tackle the hill.

I view it the same way I view dads sitting in the waiting rooms and leaving pregnant women to stand.

It would be so easy to adapt the existing barriers to scan a pass (they scan staff badges) given to expectant mums.
I'm just being grumpy and sore and refluxy but AIBU to think it?

That's what I think.

Visitors who don't need to be there?
Do people go to hospital for fun?
The visitor might be sitting with someone dying / receiving bad news.
The parent with kids might have no one to look after them.
Hospital car parks are for people who drive to hospital and need to park the car

It's worth a reminder on this thread too that we never know what disabilities or health condition someone is battling. Many conditions are invisible .

The only outward sign of my health condition (disability )is that my eyelid droops a bit, but inwardly I could be anything from so well I can walk several miles to so unwell I might need to be admitted to ICU . People with my condition often post about how they have been scolded for parking in disabled spaces even when prominently displaying their blue badges, because they are assumed to be healthy even when seriously unwell

You've got to love the empathy! Men will never understand it but you'd like to think another woman has your back.

The op is pissed off, tired, hormonal etc. But no as per usual let's roll out the hidden disabilities which is pretty obvious she wasn't referring to. Don't get pregnant and if you do don't moan or vent about it because women should just get on with it! I'm with you op. Makes me thankful for where I gave birth.

Want and need are different things though. I might have wanted visitors but I didn’t need them.

The pregnant women need to be there.

Obviously if visitors have a disability that’s different but most can walk from the further car park.

My visitors actually all came by train as it happens but o realise that doesnt help people in isolated places

Is this your hospital?

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Fundamentally, there’s a woeful lack of parking at nearly every hospital I’ve ever visited. They all need massive multi-storey car parks building on site, ASAP.

It is definitely a physical change of state of though.

It would make sense of patients to use the car park not visitors.

Yeah pregnancy can be truly miserable. But that should really make us more aware of what it's like for those who deal with such problems long-term. Not think that pregnancy deserves special treatment at a hospital. Where people are, y'know, dying.

@HuwsLineIsItAnyway out of curiosity are you in Scotland? My local hospital is exactly the way you describe.

As a group, pregnant women are probably among the most able attending the hospital. We really really don't need special treatment above other patients.

I agree. I remember once reading a comment on MN about how pregnancy and parenthood are such mammoth changes to women's lives that sometimes it makes mothers start to lose sight of genuinely vulnerable members of society. I think there's a lot of truth to that. You see it all the time on those jaw-dropping threads about wheelchairs on buses, where people honestly seem to believe they shouldn't have to fold a buggy to make space for a wheelchair in the fucking WHEELCHAIR space.

So we can't complain ever because someone is worse off? It's not going to happen. But I'd have thought a bit of solidarity amongst women should be a given.

If the op said the car park is used for people dying to ensure they have a quick access and she demands it for pregnant women I'd be very much in the entitled much opinion! As it is the op is on about random visitors, routine stuff. That would piss most pregnant women off. If your mate moaned to you would you give her the same lecture? (Don't answer that as I have a bad feeling you would)

Oh absolutely complain! Whine away, god knows how many posts you'd find if mine under how many usernames doing that.

But don't argue that pregnant women need special treatment over other patients at a hospital, because that's the exact opposite of empathetic.

I think a few folk missed the fact that anyone attending non-maternity medical appointments enters is one of the three main entrances on the front side. (Where the three large main car parks are)
Only people going to maternity enter via the back entrance.
As I happens I was there for an ECG and other specialist appointments today because I'm higher risk.
Pregnancy may not be a disability but it puts tremendous strain on the body, particularly in the later weeks and even in women that don't have the issues I do.

And for those asking how I know people are visitors, the fact that they were bailing helium balloons, teddies and gift bags in shades of blue and pink is a bit of a giveaway 😂

Our trust likes to get folk out asap (at 12 noon I was giving directions to a couple leaving with a baby that had been born at 4am!). No one in for that short a time NEEDS visitors (quite frankly I was in for 5 days last time and even I didn't need them, didn't get a choice though)

Fully believe it. Drove me crackers during covid with all the social media campaigning about visitation rights for partners at maternity wings.

Now I had a baby in July 2020, I had appointments alone, I waved goodbye to DH as we left recovery after I had a section and hemorrhaged and DD was resuscitated. I get it. But I also lost a parent to cancer a few months later and knew just how much time they spent in hospital alone.

By all means try and improve things for patients but don't campaign solely for the healthiest group.

Please read my posts and the ops. It's not about the people seriously ill. It's about those who can't be arsed and carrying the congratulation balloons.

I'm not arguing pregnant women are worse off, that's awful. I do think they deserve special treatment though. Way better than they/we get to be honest!

I don't know of any hospitals with ample parking. Make that carpark patients only and then those visitors will be filling the other carparks making it harder for the other patients. Making the maternity unit the only unit with designated parking makes zero sense.

We are all different, you might have been fine without visitors but others won't be and we know how vulnerable new mothers are to PND so let them have support if they need it.

So was every car in the car park newly parked with people getting out with their balloons? Or were most of them just parked and you had no idea who they belonged to.

We get it you are fed up you couldn't park but that is a problem for most patients/visitors at most hospitals.

So if Mom is in hospital and baby is in NICU, Dad has to park miles away cos someone can't be expected to walk to their 12 week scan?

And the only thing uncomfortable I remember from my twin pregnancy was sitting down on hard seats.

Ok. Do you think the new grandparents should park right outside the cancer ward instead? Or near the emergency department so those rushing to get to their injured child can't park? Near HDU to block those whose brother is dying? Stop the elderly from parking near orthopaedics?

It's a hospital. Every space might be wanted by someone, and there are never enough spots. If you want to have a system to indicate true need, then it is an awful lot more complicated than telling people where to park.

It's hyperthetical! It's a moan. If the op was sharing a link for a petition I'd get your point. She's not. She's pregnant. It sucks. If only people would think outside their lazy little box it wouldn't have been an issue. My dh would definitely park there. I wouldn't. Because I remember how hard it is. (We have the same carpark setup where I am, hence why maybe I can empathise)

But that's my point - if you park elsewhere at the hospital you're blocking someone else. If you don't park at the hospital (I usually parked at Asda or took a taxi after nearly missing an appointment in the carpark queue) then fair enough.

No one is parking at a hospital for shits and giggles.

Maybe there should be a priority system. So when you arrive you give your details and they conclude from that where you should park.
Standard ENT appointment-at the back
Broken limb-middle
Unconscious-at front

Of course things change both in the condition of the patient and everyone else arriving. They could reassess regularly and announce over the tannoy.
"Mr Smith-you've now come out of recovery and have drunk a cup of tea. You're no longer entitled to priority parking. Please move your car from the front to the middle as we have more urgent cases coming in."
😂