To think our current way of living is unsustainable?

[goldenlikedaylight]

The number of sick days in 2022 was at a record high. I myself had 2 months off from work last year because of my mental health just crumbling beneath me. I've heard of so many adults who have also taken sick leave for mental health, or have had to take time out from working because of it. I just think the way modern life is set up at the moment is not sustainable, and it's breaking people. Does anyone else feel the same?

How would you change it though? People are chasing material possessions to the detriment of family and community but I don't think anyone will want to change. Plus times have always been hard, perhaps there was a golden period in the latter half of the 20th century but would you rather live in the 1930s or in the 19th century?

So what do you want to do to change it?

My mental health is fucked and I've had 3 days off in the last 10 years because I had (proper) flu. I'd rather crack on if it's all the same to you.

What is your set up? Maybe yours personally is unsustainable and it is an issue with your workplace or it could be that type of work doesn’t suit you at all. Like having a a socially anxious person having a front facing role where they are forced to mingle with a lot of people every day. Or it’s possibly your home set up,with just too many demands on you.

What do you think needs to change?

Which bit isn’t sustainable and what would you change? Hope you’re better now.

Yes it is, but not just in a personal, mental health sense.

It's unsustainable in terms of the human race.

Sadly hardly anyone wants to confront this and therefore we are (as Private Fraser often pointed out on Dad's Army) DOOMED!

Have a read about Economic Degrowth and the movement behind it.

This would transform many people’s lives.

I think it very much depends on the individual. I work long hours, in a stressful job, as do all my colleagues. In 25 years, amongst my immediate colleagues, I know of only one person who had to take some time off for stress. The rest of us get tired of course, we're all juggling households, DC and usual life stresses and strains, but seem to manage OK. I think it's down to choosing a job that works for you, as PP suggested. If you enjoy your work, intense periods (which happen in every job) don't seem so stressful. I suppose the industry that we're in also attracts a certain 'type' of person and we all accept it's the nature of the work.

What generation are you picking as "this generation"? I don't know the research but unless it's predominantly people within a decade or so on age, there's no"uh it's this pathetic snowflake generation, don't know the meaning of. hard!" or your words to that effect.

Interesting responses from people who all seem to be coping and there judging anyone who isn't as weak.

I agree that current life isn't sustainable - the demands and expectations on workers are far beyond the same from recent history - we are a capitalist society and that is driving increasing performance demands on staff (both private and public sectors it seems). One of my 5(!) businesses that I run has a budget this year of 30% profit growth compared to 2022 - and this with the same size team and massive negative structural changes driven by the board wanting more profit.

And then there is the 'keeping up with the Joneses' lifestyle (that I am completely guilty of) which is often driven by contemporaries inheriting sums from the previous generation who may not have had the same demands placed upon them but benefitted hugely financially. I have read that we are the first generation in recent history to be in a worse off position than the previous generation - something is going wrong with our society!

When I stopped being a student (finally) at the age of 26 and joined the world of work, I couldn't believe how so much of it was completely pointless. Mainly the commuting and being in the office at the same time everyday regardless of whether that was useful or not.
I'm very lucky because Covid completely changed my way of life. Now WFH and I'm in a job I enjoy and have worked hard for. It is stressful but I get satisfaction from it. No more endless hours on trains, getting stressed because they're delayed, starting work at 9am because that's just what we do.
So yes I do agree with you that it can be soul destroying to spend your time in completely pointless ways at work, and get no satisfaction, which can lead to stress.
Sometimes you can change things though and derive greater fulfilment from life. I think you need to start with thinking about how you want to spend your time at work and what you enjoy doing. It can be easier said than done. Take care of yourself 💐

What?

You think people today have to work hard?

Tell that to the children who did 12 hour shifts, six days a week down the mines, or who regularly lost limbs working in textile mills.

The vast majority of people today don't "work hard", they might not like their job, but nobody who works in an office environment "works hard", same for schools, universities, shops, restaurants, you name it. None of it is "hard work", boring perhaps, but not "hard".

You could quit your job and get another if you don't want to do it anymore. The 30% can be someone else's problem.

That's my point, this whole "I'm too stressed to work" thing. Most people who say it don't seem to be able to back it up with anything tangible.

A firefighter who says "My mental health has been affected by the last decade of pulling dead bodies from the wreckage of cars and burnt out buildings" they have a point.

But someone saying "I can't work, my mental health is too fragile from that new admin system they introduced, I'm so stressed", well that just sounds like nonsense in comparison.

I think a lot of it comes down to the failure to value traditional female work. Motherhood but also bolstering the community through social contact, volunteering, using local shops etc.

I'm not in any way proposing a return to two gendered spheres but there should be a way to value domestic labour and caring work, whether paid or unpaid, more.

A four day week would be a good start.

The demands and expectations placed upon workers are much easier than those expected in any other time. My grandparents generation retired in their 60s and were lucky to physically survive for 5-10 years afterwards. Mining and industry was not as regulated in the 60s, 70s or even 80s as it is now. Although we don't actually even have any mining in this country anymore!

That being said, I think there is an expectation on both parents to work nowadays and for mothers to still provide the same standards of homelife as SAHM whilst ALSO working a 40 hour week!

@onefinemess I hate this idea that somehow we are less resilient. It's rubbish. There are a lot of social factors involved in the issues here, for example:

• poor housing and insane rents / cost of living - less permanent situations = more stress
• people expected to be online for jobs outside of regular working hours - before email and internet this would not be expected
• people more isolated than ever - either living far from their families or less likely to go out (post covid etc), WFH without seeing anyone all week
• wages don't go as far as they once would have historically in terms of rent, mortgage etc in terms of what they pay now vs historically
• divide between rich and poor worse than ever even if our basic standard of living has improved in some ways, we have a much more precarious situation in general
• poor healthcare and difficult to get seen if you do have a health condition (NHS care much worse)
• social pressures to conform to various "norms" of achievement higher than ever with social media etc, leading to poor mental health

And so on...

I agree OP. Never before have we had the 24/7 pressures we have now with the internet. Add to that the breakdown of family units meaning there's never any help and many people are lonely. Especially women imo - men can have it all, women do it all.
We may not be down the mines 12 hours a day, but we work/will be working decades longer than people in the past, and work follows us home.

I don't have a solution but I do think that most people are trying to cram too much in. Most people seem to be working more just to cover the basics and with both parents working I don't know how anyone can keep on top of the house work or cook anything beyond frozen meals. It just becomes a grind, and no matter how much extra effort you put in it doesn't feel like you can ever get ahead.

I just work 3 days as I know I could not work longer hours. Self employed and 60 soon. No way could I carry on 5 days like some of my friends my age! I prefer to have less money and feel in one piece. No mortgage no car though. Nor any holiday but I can live with that. The tranquility I enjoy is more important.

You think people today have to work hard?

I think some people do, yes. Some people are working in two or three manual/physical jobs just to make ends meet. Probably mostly not the ones talking about it online.

None of which is serious enough that it would affect your mental health.

We don't have poor housing in the UK, even the most rank, damp, dodgy, bodged in over an off-licence with questionable electrics is a Palace compared to normal housing for 98% of the people on the planet. In fact, by WHO standards, if you have a roof over your head, a fridge and some spare change in your pocket, even 10p, then YOU are wealthier than 98% of the people currently alive.

You think working at a computer is stressful! 🙄

You can leave your house anytime or God Forbid! talk to your neighbours, that's self imposed isolation.

Wages don't go as far? Yeah, that tends to happen sometimes. When I was in Uni, I lived in a house share and ate pot noodle with mayo for three years (and for the four after) the kitchen sink was live, something to do with the earth wire attached to the plumbing, we git around it by turning off the mains when we needed to do the dishes. But the economy ebbs and flows, in a few years it will be OK again.

We do not have poor health care. You might have to wait a few hours in A&E, but your broken leg will be fixed for free. In other countries you would just be crippled for life or have to pay thousands for a doctor.

As for social media causing stress! Yeah, maybe don't use it. Poof! social media stress gone!

You are setting a very low bar for society there. We can do much better, it's not a race to the bottom.

And working in an office can be stressful and boring at the same time. It's not the same stress as being chased by a wild animal but if it's enduring and persistent it can be extremely harmful to health.

This is my experience too. Even amongst friends and family I don’t know anyone who has been on short term or long term sick.

You think working at a computer is stressful!

Do you think burnout is bollocks then? Yes, it can be stressful. Mental exertion, constantly changing expectations and processes, accountabilty, lack of ability to control what you’re doing, presenteeism… all stressors that can apply to desk jobs.

Would I prefer that sort of stress to working on an Icelandic fishing boat in the 19th century when sleep deprivation meant people could lose their grip on reality to the extent they killed each other? Or six days a week down a mine? Obviously, yes. Doesn’t mean that there can be no health impact though.