Partner called me a c*** and f-ing b****

[Whatislifegw]

am I in the wrong

partner and I were play fighting I tickled his neck and he was bent over and then pinched the back of my leg which went up and accidentally kneed him in the eye which is when he started swearing and shouting at me for an accident.

I think his language is disgusting and not acceptable no matter what happened and he is angry because I refused to apologise for accidentally kneeing him after he started swearing at me.

am I in the wrong?

we’ve had arguments in the past about his language use and tbh I feel like just saying we’re not meant to be together and I’ve had enough.

Perfect. There's also a child involved. FFS.

Silly to play fight in front of your toddler I think.

I'd be telling my kids that you apologise if you hurt someone even if it's an accident.

Toddler saw dad hurt and mum sworn at - not good.

Personally, I'd forgive the language if it was said as a knee jerk reaction to pain but not if he thought calling you that was ok, not if it's regular, not if he'd say it to the toddler if they dropped a toy on his foot.

I'd swear too if someone kneed me in the face, accident or not

If you hurt someone, you apologise!

Using your child for sympathy votes and points over your husband...

I kneed him in the eye, he swore, I did not apologise, but my child was there, PROOF HE'S A MONSTER!!!

You both sound a bit ridiculous. Also you shouldn’t play fight in front of your child who doesn’t know the difference.. then had to witness you refusing to apologise for hurting your husband and him swearing at you. Neither of you were great role models here.

Underrated post 🤣👍🏻

Baffled at these responses as always. Calling someone a cunt and a fucking bitch is a bit different from an an instinctive “oh fuck that hurt” don’t you think? No, you’re not being unreasonable for expecting your partner to not call you names for an accident.

I don't think its the swearing that's the problem exactly, I'd swear too in that situation.
Its calling the OP a cunt and a fucking bitch that's the problem.
I'd probably swear but I don't think what was clearly an accident warrants that.

Exactly this.

And this is why I tell all the kids at school play fighting is a bad idea.

Ffs, Play fighting? Why??

Kids "playfight"
Adults should know better

Yea his language was awful.

Don’t play fight and for heavens sake don’t do it in front of your child

Playfighting in front of your child? Wtaf? You think that’s appropriate?

This. No wonder you read about so many shit relationships here.

"Fuck that hurt" in the second you get hit? Fair

Calling someone names when it was a silly accident, especially calling your partner a cunt or a bitch? Come on. The bar is on the floor.

I know I'm the fun sponge sorry not sorry but play-fighting is an idiotic thing to do as adults. Especially in front of a child. It is frequently a cover for DV and even when it's not, WTF is it for? Your 2 yo doesn't know it's not real, particularly when you've kneed someone in the eye and they are livid about it.

Stop this utterly ridiculous nonsense. And apologise when you fuck up. Even when it's a mistake. Which means you apologise for hurting his, he apologizes for swearing at you. And neither of you does it again.

God help your poor child in school, with this example.

A general "Fucking hell" I think is fine, but it sounds like he went way beyond that.

Having said that, if you refused to apologise, accident or not, that's pretty shitty too.

Moral of the story is: you both sound a bit shit.

For gods sake, there’s nothing wrong with play fighting, I think most happy playful couples do this from time to time as part of a HEALTHY relationship. It’s called having fun and letting your inner child out. It obviously depends on the circumstances but I don’t see anything wrong doing it in front of a toddler either when it’s clearly just play not actual fighting. However your partner massively crossed a boundary by using that disgusting language to you and definitely in front of your child. That’s bang out of order and I think you need to establish boundaries with him in future. On one hand I can kind of understand an overreaction to pain in the heat of the moment (although not to call you names like that) but to continue not to see that he’s being a fucking twat, sorry no. You’ve done nothing wrong, he needs to apologize to you for his behaviour. As for all those perfect people on here looking down on you/judging for having a playful side to your relationship, get a life. I pity your sad, humourless existences.

I pity your sad, humourless existences.

Yet no one gets kneed in the eye or called a cunt at mine's. [shrug]

So you smack at and tickle each other, then one hurts the other and the hurt one screams, name-calls, and carries on while the other refuses to apologize?

You are both very unreasonable for having a toddler when the pair of you still act like toddlers yourselves.

Is it a fetish?

I sometimes wonder how some people manage in the real world.
He was hurt. He swore.
I can't get worked up over that.

Just imagine the pain of knee to the face. Particularly when up to that point you were having a laugh.

I can't believe your aromatic response WASN'T "OMG I'm so sorry!!!!"

He swore, not ideal. But to use that to avoid apologising? That's a bit on the crap side op.

And I agree that play fighting is just asking for problems. I have instinctive responses that would have flattened my ex. He learned very quickly that startling me deliberately was not a good idea (illustrated perfectly with a smack to the nose nose when he scared the crap out of me).

So your partner called you a cunt and a bitch in front of your 2 year old, but that didn't seem important enough to mention in your first post?

You both need to grow up. Poor kid.

YABU

You physically hurt him - an accident.

And he reacted verbally - a reaction he couldn’t help.

He has more right to be upset than you do but even that would be ridiculous.

I don’t know why you’re making it into such a big deal.