Page 4 | AIBU - child in white dress a wedding

sweetdevil90 · 2023-07-21T22:26:32+00:00

So obviously it's a no-no for a grown up to wear a white dress as a wedding guest, but would I be unreasonable to put my 5 year old in a white dress for a wedding? It's not too frilly or fussy, and she really wants to wear it. Would it be a massive Faux pas, or can a 5 year old get away with it?

JenniferBarkley · 22/07/2023 13:24

DappledThings · 22/07/2023 13:21

So much overthinking. If I dressed DD in a white dress and someone thought I was trying to make a point I'd consider them just as daft as a bride actually objecting to it. And their talking about me would me just as meaningless.

Life's too short to give any headspace to such nonsense.

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The thing is there's a wide range.

Distant friend's daughter in a white cotton sundress with a blue cardigan, while the bridal party are in pink - no one will bat an eyelid.

Niece of happy couple in puffy white number with sash that matches the bridesmaids, then it does look like a point is being made.

Personally, I wouldn't want anyone to think I was making some sort of petty point with how I dressed my child (because whether or not you would think it, some people will) and so I would pick an outfit to avoid it.

ApolloandDaphne · 22/07/2023 13:38

I wore a white dress to a wedding when i was a tot. In the photos i look adorable. My DM tells me that moments after those photos were taken i decided to roll down a grassy slope in front of the hotel. It appears my dress was a delightful white and green marl for the rest of the day! Be warned!!

FarmGirl78 · 22/07/2023 13:43

takealettermsjones · 21/07/2023 23:39

If I saw a child in white at a wedding I would assume they were in the wedding party.

This!

General rule of wedding attire is "If you have to ask whether it's suitable then the answer is no".

LittleMonks11 · 22/07/2023 13:45

Can we see a pic of it?

Pottedpalm · 22/07/2023 13:46

Seasideanticscanleadtosandybuckets · 22/07/2023 10:27

Better than fuchsia pink..
The colour of choice of a friend who brought her 2 x dd's to my dc free wedding. Her pink dd is like Where's bloody Wally at the side of every photo.... Not still miffed after 8 years honestly..

DH’s aunt brought his cousin to our child free wedding, despite asking twice and bing told no children. She dressed him as a page boy in bluesatin pantaloons and a frilly shirt 🙄

LittleMonks11 · 22/07/2023 13:48

PP your DH aunt cracks me up. That's insane

Maray1967 · 22/07/2023 13:51

My 10 year old cousin wore a (classic plain not frilly) white dress to mine - not a problem. My aunt asked me if it was ok. I only wanted one bridesmaid who was an adult so she couldn’t have been mistaken for a flower girl.

loobylou10 · 22/07/2023 13:54

@NancyJoan 1000 apologies

AppleCinnamonBagel · 22/07/2023 13:58

UrsulaIsMyQueen · 22/07/2023 10:51

I couldn’t have cared less what the children guests wore to my wedding (within reason, I probably would have raised an eyebrow at a Spider-Man costume for example). Can’t see an issue with fuchsia pink either. Surely no bride is going to moan about being upstaged by a 5 year old?

I'd have loved a small child dressed as Spider-Man at my wedding!

Less so if it's your 22 yo nephew I guess 🤣

DinnaeFashYersel · 22/07/2023 14:00

5 years old will be fine.

There's no danger of her being taken for the bride 😂

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/07/2023 14:01

Does anyone really even notice what a five year old is wearing? That is really weird.

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 22/07/2023 14:02

Prescottdanni123 · 22/07/2023 10:59

You could run the risk of her looking like part of the wedding party if the flower girls/young bridesmaids are wearing white.

I just don't understand the problem with that. Why on earth would anyone care whether a little girl dressed up in all her finery is part of the wedding party or not? What does it matter?

randomsabreuse · 22/07/2023 14:03

5foot5 · 21/07/2023 23:34

I can't imagine putting a five year old in a white dress anywhere TBH. If she is anything like my DD was at that age you will take your eyes off her for a nanosecond and next time you look it will be smudged with chocolate or biro or mud or grass stain or something.

This, I go for colours, ideally with a pattern for a reason!

WeightoftheWorld · 22/07/2023 14:07

Never occured to me this could be an issue. Sure an adult is different but a little child is fine surely. I put my then 3 year old in a fancy white dress for a friend's wedding a few years ago. Another relative had bought her the dress ages prior and it was so fancy really only a wedding was a suitable occasion to wear it so that's why I put it on her. She wore a gold cardigan with it and I can't remember what colour shoes. Everyone said she looked cute.

ErrolTheDragon · 22/07/2023 14:10

ApolloandDaphne · 22/07/2023 13:38

I wore a white dress to a wedding when i was a tot. In the photos i look adorable. My DM tells me that moments after those photos were taken i decided to roll down a grassy slope in front of the hotel. It appears my dress was a delightful white and green marl for the rest of the day! Be warned!!

And I'm sure guests with an ounce of sense were delighted to see a small child with the evidence of having had fun on her!

A tot in still-clean clothes at the end of a day is a bit sad. Let your child enjoy her white dress for a day, OP!

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/07/2023 14:11

ErrolTheDragon · Today 14:10
ApolloandDaphne · Today 13:38

I wore a white dress to a wedding when i was a tot. In the photos i look adorable. My DM tells me that moments after those photos were taken i decided to roll down a grassy slope in front of the hotel. It appears my dress was a delightful white and green marl for the rest of the day! Be warned!!”

That sounds fabulous 😃

UrsulaIsMyQueen · 22/07/2023 14:31

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 22/07/2023 14:02

I just don't understand the problem with that. Why on earth would anyone care whether a little girl dressed up in all her finery is part of the wedding party or not? What does it matter?

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Exactly this

Original poster

sweetdevil90 · 22/07/2023 20:29

Thanks all, I'm gonna speak to the brides mum, see what bridesmaids/flower girls are wearing and see what her thoughts are on it, and go from there! Don't want to ask the bride and her feel like she has to say its OK if she's actually not ok with it.

OP posts:

ApolloandDaphne · 22/07/2023 20:32

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/07/2023 14:11

ErrolTheDragon · Today 14:10
ApolloandDaphne · Today 13:38

I wore a white dress to a wedding when i was a tot. In the photos i look adorable. My DM tells me that moments after those photos were taken i decided to roll down a grassy slope in front of the hotel. It appears my dress was a delightful white and green marl for the rest of the day! Be warned!!”

That sounds fabulous 😃

It is a memory recalled with humour and love. I was very welcome in my grubby white frock.