What benefits can a single father claim

[XStardustX]

Asking for a friend.
He dosent work as he has an injury and can't work and suffers from really bad anxiety around people, he dosent really go out of house. He already gets benefits. Not entirely sure but i I think he gets pip anyway. Not sure what else.
I'm just wondering what all would he be entitled to? So that I can mention this to him.he lives in Swansea so Welsh government if that helps.
He just told me today he got paid and all his money went on bills. He's had no food for the past week and I had to lend him a tenner to go to the shop to buy some food. He has two children. 14 and 11 , two boys who stay at weekends but he told me he hasn't been able to have rhe boys around in few weeks because he hasn't had any money to buy any food for the house to feed them. Can't he get like any child benefit? Or is it only the mother could claim that since they are with her full time and his Friday to sunday

Well what a load of rubbish. Literally any parent can make an application for a child arrangement order.

My advice is to give him the link to claim ESA that I posted upthread, and stop giving him money.

He'll only be able to claim contribution-based ESA, or UC. You can't make a new claim for means-tested ESA.

If he rents and is already getting housing benefit, and has paid sufficient NI contributions in the relevant years, it might be worth claiming ESA, but I'd have to do a calculation to be sure.

If he rents but isn't getting housing benefit, he needs to apply for Universal Credit and submit "FIT notes" from his GP initially. He should answer "Yes" to the question that asks if he has a disability or health condition that puts him at a disadvantage in getting/keeping a job, and he'll get a "capability for work " questionnaire to fill in. He'll get assessed after a few weeks and his money will go up if he's found to have limited capability for work and work-related activity.

Because the children are mainly resident with their mother, he can't get anything for them.

If he hasn't already done so, he should apply to the council for a reduction in his council tax.

Well I'm just going on the information you've provided. You said he can't have them to visit as he doesn't have enough money. So that means he only sees them occasionally, right?

If hes giving his ex so much money that he can't afford to see his own children, perhaps he needs to take a look at what the CMS would calculate he should pay. If he's on full benefits, I think it's just £7 a week.

But I also wonder the same as previous posters - if the mother of the children is so terrible, why on earth has he left the children with her?

Why should he get free money when he only has them weekends?
Loads of people work with injuries, myself included plus I have incurable condition and awaiting an op. I also work with people with missing limbs etc, who do really physical work like catering. Also have severe anxiety and PTSD from DV.
He has children...he should work for them.
Imagine a new type of benefits existing for weekends only !! I think you are a troll.

If I was majorly concerned about my husbands ability to care for our son I wouldn't be leaving him in his care never mind having him live with him.
You can't claim benefits fir kids that don't live with you.

So why hasn't he got custody?

Why does he have no choice? What on earth is stopping him from protecting his sons from what sounds like a monster of a mother?

Why doesn't he make sure there's food in his house for his children before paying her? Why doesn't he apply for custody? If the mother is so horrible, how can he leave the children with her?

There's always a choice! He's chosen to leave his kids with an awful mother

Let me clarify I have never said he dosent see the children. I said he hasn't had the children around to stay

He can't just take the kids whenever he feels like it. Those were the days he was awarded

So there is a Child Arrangement Order in place?

Hmm. If his ex is so terrible, why did he leave the dc with her?

Mind you, with his anxiety and inability to leave the house, is he any better a parent?

Poor kids.

Exactly.

New boyfriend, eh? I'd probably not get too involved and let him sort it out for himself.

His circumstances have changed presumably since he agreed how much to pay the ex. Now he earns way less as he’s on benefits.

If he has the kids Friday night to Monday morning why is he paying any money to their mother? Surely he doesn’t have to pay at all?

That’s the problem. He needs to go to citizens advice urgently.

You can make appointments for phone conversations with them on line I think. That’s be his best option to discuss it all from the safety of his house.

Perhaps you could help him to do that. If he wasn’t giving her money he could use the money for food. Then he could see the kids again.

Is his doctor aware he can’t go out? He could refer him for online counselling or something to help him? It’s all phone apptmnts now where I am so that’s suit him if wakes us like that.

Whatever happens this situation can’t go on. I hope you can get help for him. And he can resume work, even if it’s a computer based job like admin from home.

@StephanieSuperpowers nope! You assume wrong. Absolutely not romantically linked to him. I'm married

So he wasn't awarded custody in court. So the tales about the monstrous mum and heroic warrior dad are all bullshit.

It’s amazing how many ‘wonderful fathers’ leave the kids with the vile abusing ex on mumsnet.

Are you the new partner perchance?

if he’s paying his bills then giving mum money he’s not ‘financially supporting’ them, he’s contributing. There is a difference.

A court has clearly deemed her a fit parent if he was ‘awarded’ certain contact and they were left with her.

Dont get me wrong, it’s a shit situation for him, but slagging her off won’t improve anything.

Op can you offer to sit down, go through his bank statements with him?

See exactly what he has coming in and what’s going out?

You seem to know a-lot about what’s going on. But also not a lot. He may be getting everything he is entitled to. He may not be. It could be a budgeting issue. It might not be.

No one can advise what he might be entitled to, as you are really sure what he already gets

@XStardustX

I think the responses would be different if it was a female with no money & anxiety.

If he can't afford to feed the children then he's probably giving too much to the mother. She will be getting a lot more support financially from child benefit, tax credits or UC. The children likely get free school meals so that's one less meal for her to provide compared to a weekend day.

He may need to look at local food banks & could see if a local charity or Salvation Army type organisation could support him.

Citizens Advice is probably his best bet.

@Rachie1973 it's also very easy to judge a situation on mumsnet that you know nothing about. I asked for advice on what benefits he might be able to claim while he gets back on his feet. I don't know why you feel the need to criticise someone you don't even know. He does financially support them. He pays for all their classes, eldest goes to karate and youngest goes to piano , she dosent. He paid for their school kits last year aswell, amongst so many things. Birthday parties ect, while she blew money on 3 holidays that year and going out . The eldest is fully aware and has told my son ( they are friends) that he wants to stay with dad. He's a fantastic father , nobody could fault him over the years. He's fallen on very hard times these last few weeks.
There are lots of parents who aren't fit , but when it comes to custody , you'll have one hell of a task convincing a court to remove children from their mother to give to the other parent . I've had several friends go through court after divorces over custody .
And no, you assume wrong. I'm not involved with him romantically at all.

Your point about court is incorrect.

If she was such a poor mother as you describe there would have been social services/cafcass involvement and likely a section 7 report. The court has deemed her fit to have primary residency regardless. This is despite the fact that statistically men are more successful in residency applications should they choose to apply. The majority don't as it suits them for their ex wife to do the donkey work..

You need to think about that because this has red flags all over it.