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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dry spell

3 replies

Solsticesummer · 19/07/2023 19:47

for context, two children 7yo and 4months. DH and I probably have sex on average 1-3 times every fortnight. We’ve just hit a 3 week dry spell and I have no sex drive at the moment whatsoever.

DH asks me what’s up tonight and I explained that I was feeling the awkwardness around this, that I was sorry but I have no drive and I went onto open up about some possibilities like my weight concerns but also that it might be because his sex drive is through the roof.

We are not usually affectionate without it turning sexual, a kiss often turns into a snog, a cuddle turns into a grope, he slaps my ass everytime he walks by and I darnt give him a kiss goodnight in bed without it turning into sex. I did open up about this and asked to tune up the romantic affection and turn down the sexual cheap thrills! He didn’t say a word except some dig about us living like we’re old pensioners…!

AIBU to be annoyed that I’ve opened up and he’s just acted completely uninterested/pissed off? Or should I just try to go along with the constant innuendos and be appreciative that my husband is interested?!

OP posts:
GardeningIdiot · 19/07/2023 19:55

YANBU. He sounds immature and uninterested in your feelings and experience. I think you'll need to be direct, if you haven't been already: "it's a massive turn off when you slap my arse and I can't even give you a goodnight kiss without being groped."

Is the sex any good for you when it happens?

Solsticesummer · 19/07/2023 20:01

Thank you! Yes it is very good! No complaints in that respect. I just don’t have a massive sex drive in general and I think I react more interested when there’s a bit of work my end rather than it being offered on a plate 24/7!

OP posts:
GardeningIdiot · 19/07/2023 20:14

Tell him that then. And also that you don't want to be living in an episode of The Benny Hill Show - dated and not sexy!

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