To think shop workers shouldn’t have to deal with this?

[ItsCalledAConversation]

Overheard in higher-end supermarket this afternoon. A boomer-age woman shopper being helped by a student-age woman shop employee. As you do in supermarkets, we seemed to be taking the same route around the aisles so I overheard their convo a few times.

Employee repeatedly and calmly tried to help shopper: E.g, finding items, comparing prices. Shopper complains loudly, rudely and vociferously about: finding items items in shop. Availability of items on her list. Price of items. Whereabouts of staff. Whereabouts of employee as if she should be by her side throughout and acting as her personal shopping helper.

The poor employee, to her credit, kept her cool throughout this barrage and seemed professional. I was shocked by the level of vitriol and abuse. Her calm demeanour seemed to imply she was used to this kind of treatment. I almost said something (along time lines of “are you ok? You shouldn’t be speaking to her like that” but was with young DS and didn’t want to embroil him in a scene. I felt so so sorry for the employee.

Is there anyone here who acts like this toward people in shops? Is this in any way explainable? Or acceptable? I am shocked.

YABU - be kind because everyone is fighting their own battles. The lady was having a bad day and grumpiness is ok.
YANBU - nobody deserved to be treated that way at work.

YANBU. I wouldn't have given it much of a second thought though tbh. There are sone rude, entitled people in the world. This woman was clearly one of them.

My friend works in a clothes shop and someone did a poo on the floor in the changing rooms before. How awful is that for a retail worker to deal with! I can't be doing with rude people and she sadly is probably used to it.

Yabu to ask such a question as it is a given that nobody is going to say treating people in this way is fine and that shop workers should have to put deal with this.

YABU for saying boomer age.

I work in a supermarket. Every week, at least once, people complain about the prices, the lack of stock, lack of staff etc. I tell people that pricing is beyond my remit and if they wish to discuss the stock or staffing levels they need to speak to a manager. They rarely do, they just want to vent.

Thereare lots of vile people out there unfortunately and its not until you spend a day in the life of a retail worker(and many other roles) that you relai3se this!. Ive vowed never to work in a retail role again for as long as I live !.

One of my dc recently resigned from a farm shop because of this type of behaviour,its appalling shop assistants aren't personal staff !

People who work in public facing roles unfortunately have to put up with entitled idiots here and there; it's annoying and not excusable, but I'm sure the assistant was used to it.

And btw entitled idiots come in all ages, so maybe less of the ageism?

"Boomer age" 🙄

@User1864876 Why is saying boomer age unreasonable? She was of the baby boom generation.

@Thewarrioress I guess it’s U or naive of me to raise this. The YABU viewpoint, which I can see, is that this shopper may have additional needs/had a hard day/ been frustrated at the service she was receiving and someone would come along to tell me she was somehow justified in her behaviour. There must be people on here who have acted like this in the past, I was hoping to gain some insight on their perspective.

People have always been rude to retail staff. It's not something new and certainly nothing to do with her being a "boomer"

@DoctorWoo describing someone as an age isn’t ageist, it’s just factual. I implied no negativity toward her age, I was simply painting a picture. As I was by saying the employee was student age, but you haven’t pulled me up on that. Please explain how you have drawn an assumption of ageism from my post.

I worked in HR for a big supermarket years ago and the shit treatment shop floor workers got was eye opening and depressing. I had so many in my office in tears. They had abuse (physical, verbal and sexual) regularly. Once had a frozen chicken thrown at someone working a till. People doing disgusting things in toilets and changing rooms and leaving it for staff to find. Had a regular flasher coming in with his dick out. Honestly just a horrible job. This was a very posh area, the nastiest were usually the richest!!!

It's an ageist remark, often used as a derogatory term on Mumsnet, does it really matter the ages of the people, student age, boomer age.

If you want people to take your thread seriously, stay away from ageist remarks

Sadly, it's all too common. Some customers think they can speak and treat you like utter crap and all you can do is smile. If I were you, I'd let the store know about the great customer service you witnessed from this employee, so hopefully they could be recognised in some way. Most places do a customer survey online you can fill in. In my place of work, this is the way our bonus is paid, in points form, which can then be turned into vouchers.

What is her age got to do with anything, my DH who is 74 runs a charity shop, I am 68 and often volunteer on a Saturday both us have been verbally abused by younger people mostly in their 30s/40s some people are rude and entitled, some are pleasant

YABU ..... Boomer age woman....🙄 I fall into that category (just)and wouldn't dream of treating anyone like that.

Try again with .... rude woman......

The fact you have mentioned their ages and sex suggests that you think these facts are pertinent to your story.

The fact that you have observed one interaction, and extrapolated from this the idea that all - what, people? women? women aged over 60? - treat all shop workers - or, all female shop workers under 25 - like shit, suggests your critical thinking skills need some work.

I agree - it's ageist and I have reported it to MNHQ

This is also common. The things that have been found in fitting rooms never surprised me. Dirty Nappies, used sanitary products and puddles of diarrhea, It's disgusting.

The baby boom was immediately post war, so the shopper must have been well into her seventies to be a ‘boomer’.

bet she wasn’t , though.

I work as a manager for a charity shop .Believe me all human behaviour is with me on a daily basis. Entitled,bullying behaviour is a given I’m afraid. From crap left outside that you need to go to the tip with but think we should accept ( think dirty shoes with holes in and deep fat fryers complete with congealed oil 😠to hammering on the door when we are closed for the day because I can’t open without volunteers .To thinking ‘the needy’ their words will be grateful for dirty icky clothes.
We have to be polite and smiley it’s our job. But my volunteers shouldn’t have to put up with bad behaviour. I think everyone’s behaviour is worse generally since covid though. I used to work in heritage and visitors can be equally entitled there too.
I always treat people like I’d like to be treated.

Unfortunately some people just assume shop employee means a person who is beneath them.

When I worked in a shop, I remember some horrendous snobbery from customers. Assuming you wouldn't have heard of exotic products such as tahini!
People dumping their coffee cups or spilling drinks on shelves but not reporting it to staff.

Allowing kids to unbox toys and then leaving them alone to play in the toy aisle. Getting arsey if you then asked them to supervise their kids.

One memorable Xmas eve a kid was massively sick on Christmas decorations, the family just walked off, didn't report it and carried on shopping. Then another customers poor kids put their hands in it as they picked up the decorations. So bloody irresponsible and selfish of that family.

Some truly vile treatment of staff with various disabilities. Getting impatient and huffing and puffing, if the staff member took one second longer to deal with something than the customer was willing to tolerate.

There is a horrible snobbery towards retail staff, carers etc in this country.

OK. The term Baby Boomer used to be commonly used to describe people born in the years after WW2. It faded out of everyday use and was rarely heard post 1970s, but has recently seen a resurgence as "boomer", and is generally used in a derogatory way, e.g. to dismiss the opinions and experiences of older people: "OK boomer".
If the age of the woman was genuinely irrelevant to you, there was no need to use it at all; as it is, it seems that there's a message of "old bad, young good" in your post.