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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you park like this?

167 replies

Wertie · 15/07/2023 18:36

Second time I’ve had a disagreement at my local station. The spaces are narrow and the carpark is very very popular. Gold dust spaces, but Tbf there is a carpark 4 min walk away that’s bigger. The station one is pokey car park not really suitable for many modern cars.

On a number of occasions I’ve found very large 4x4 cars right up to the white lines. I have an old low car, thin doors. I’m slim. I can park between two of them and get out without touching their car with my doors. It’s a squeeze, but no contact at all.

Im guessing their thick doors and higher doors make this difficult, particularly if they aren’t petite. As it’s not a disabled space I’m restricting (there are wide separate spaces the other side for disabled drivers) I just park if I can park, and don’t concern myself with other cars. If I can fit, I’m in my own space I see it as fair play.

Twice I’ve come back to moody car owners of the huge cars.

My view is if their car is huge/ they struggle to get in then they should use the half empty nearby car park as it has wider spaces and you can park at the back without neighbours. I don’t see why I should walk it, if I have no needs for extra space.

Ive just had a really screamy outraged woman shouting I should consider the space taken if I’m blocking access.

I’m maybe an arsehole, as I laughed it off. But do others agree? Do this?

OP posts:
JudgeRudy · 15/07/2023 20:34

I'm with you. Essentially these big zar owners are saying they want 2 spaces.

Echio · 15/07/2023 20:38

I've got a car with massive doors - not an SUV, it's just an old bmw with 2 doors and the doors are very wide - there's even a little feeder device to bring the belt forward for you to reach to put on. When I got it, I thought nothing of it.

But it's honestly the bane of my life in the car park closest to my work - I can get in the space, but either I can't get out of the car at the start, or can't get in at the end of the day! Unfortunately i'm a bit overweight so this definitely makes the squeezing in worse!

But so long as the vehicle on the side of me is in their lines, I cannot blame them at all for my problem. The problem is 3 fold - my car, my weight and the car parks with narrow spaces. None of the problem is the person legitimately parked next to me.

You're fine as you are OP, carry on!

RecycleMePlease · 15/07/2023 20:40

If you are between the lines, you are fine.

You are lucky that they're not bastards who just open their cars into yours though....

I have kids, so I always find an edge space, or park a little ways away (like if I was with the kids, I'd use the further carpark), since they can't be trusted to be careful.

RedRobyn2021 · 15/07/2023 20:52

Yes this is fine

Snugglemonkey · 15/07/2023 21:55

I drive a big car. Tbh, it is the kind if car I used to hate and think there was no need for. Now I live on the edge of a village in Scotland. Single lane roads are common around here. There are frequently floods on one of the two routes out. The other route out is partially up a mountain, so during winter, there are huge drifts of snow. So I take back all I have said about 4x4s before!

I need mine and am unapologetic. However, I do struggle in some car parks. Since having my baby and needing the door quite wide open to get her out, I sometimes go home if there are no family spaces and the carpark is very busy. Otherwise I just park on the far edges and hope no-one else can be arsed with the walk. Doesn't work if it is busy, though!

LotsOfThingsToThinkAbout · 15/07/2023 22:00

YANBU
My car is wide so I take extra care to park carefully.

Original poster
Wertie · 15/07/2023 22:04

For those saying they’d bang their doors, believe me: they didn’t have the swing for it. I could only slide out myself like a snake wrapped around my car

It would be flat face on contact if they tried it, with a boxy heavy old car. I’ve had people rear end it without visible damage.

I’m glad even Aibu agrees, that’s a true test 😂

OP posts:
Squiggo · 15/07/2023 22:07

My car is big and wide, I have a (hidden) mobility issue so I will park further away to find an easier space. Especially if I have the children with me as they’re a bloody liability.

SmirnoffIceIsNice · 15/07/2023 22:12

The sheer audacity of that woman telling you that you should consider the empty space as taken so as not to block her when she returns! Entitlement at its best.

DiscoDeborah · 15/07/2023 22:35

Wertie · 15/07/2023 22:04

For those saying they’d bang their doors, believe me: they didn’t have the swing for it. I could only slide out myself like a snake wrapped around my car

It would be flat face on contact if they tried it, with a boxy heavy old car. I’ve had people rear end it without visible damage.

I’m glad even Aibu agrees, that’s a true test 😂

I think if you're sliding between the cars to get out then you're too close. Yes you might be between the lines but the car next to you might have had to park close to the line because of the car next to them and on it goes.

I really like the idea of everyone parking against the line in the same way.

Coolblur · 15/07/2023 22:56

I don't know. On the face of it you're being reasonable as they've parked too close to the lines, but to park in a way that you know will prevent the driver accessing the car next to you is not ok.

When I was pregnant I got back to my car to find someone had parked so close to that I couldn't get in due to my bump (I'd parked reasonably, they hadn't). I couldn't climb over the seats either for that reason (I tried). So I just had to stand there waiting until they came back. It was humiliating and upsetting. They were embarrassed but barely managed an apology.
Don't do that to someone.

Clymene · 15/07/2023 23:35

ttcat37 · 15/07/2023 20:22

Seems like the unpopular opinion but I always leave plenty of space on the driver’s side. I don’t want to get my car dinged, and I don’t want someone to struggle getting into their car, whether they’re old and can’t nimbly slither in, pregnant, fat or whatever really. I think it’s inconsiderate to not leave enough space. Blame the people who paint the spaces- I have a Vw golf which is a fairly average sized car I think and even that is almost up to the lines in some places. The best car parks are the ones that have spaces between the spaces for opening doors!

There's no such thing as the driver's side in a car park. You have no control over whether other drivers go in forward or reverse

SarahAndQuack · 15/07/2023 23:42

bitchinaldi · 15/07/2023 19:52

Parking wonky IS deviant behaviour Wink

Show quote history
Grin
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 15/07/2023 23:53

You were within the lines, they weren’t. Therefore YANBU.

”Consider the space taken” my arse

Catsmere · 16/07/2023 03:29

eldorado02 · 15/07/2023 19:19

In the US, some car parks have spaces that are labelled for “compact” cars only, i.e. not for giant SUVs or minivans. With the ubiquity of massive cars becoming ever greater here, perhaps we should do the same, or (given how little land we have) put signs up warning tank drivers that they won’t easily fit in the lines.

Same at a couple of multi-storey carparks I've used here in Australia. I have a wheelchair permit so don't generally have to bother looking for them, but it's good to know they're there. I can't stand those huge SUVs. I can't even see my teensy Corolla behind them!

Original poster
Wertie · 16/07/2023 08:42

Clymene · 15/07/2023 23:35

There's no such thing as the driver's side in a car park. You have no control over whether other drivers go in forward or reverse

Show quote history

Yep, both sides were drivers sides. One car had backed in and one was In forwards. I parked exactly in the middle I’d say, straight, with equal space to either car. I think, didn’t check, with the size of the cars they were just filling the narrow spaces, rather than anyone parking unevenly.
There was the option of parking elsewhere for them as I said…. I’ve had five children and I’d have never parked that way in pregnancy myself

OP posts:
JaceLancs · 16/07/2023 08:50

Many of our local multi storey car parks were built in the 60s when cars were much smaller
it’s not the lines that’s the problem it’s the pillars - it’s got so bad that they have marked some spaces as “small car only”
I have a big saloon but it’s more length than width
if you are in the lines and can get out yourself they are in the wrong!

grass321 · 16/07/2023 08:58

I'm the other car. Mine is stupidly wide and so much bulky interior trim that I need a decent width to get out.

As a result, I park in the empty parts of the car park as I appreciate it's my issue. I also have restricted movement due to arthritis so clambering over the boot would not be easy. What then annoys me is when another car ignores the 40 empty spaces and parks right up next to my car. Just why?

I don't want my car to be scraped so I don't park in tight spaces where I think the other driver will struggle to open their door. Or I reverse in/go in forward if it means I can leave more room on their driver side.

Peony654 · 16/07/2023 09:00

As long as you’re in the line. Their choice to have an unnecessarily big gas guzzler

megletthesecond · 16/07/2023 09:01

Yanbu. I'm a skinny little thing and can shimmy out of a small space too.
If they're driving a big car they need to use a quieter car park.

ttcat37 · 16/07/2023 10:02

Clymene · 15/07/2023 23:35

There's no such thing as the driver's side in a car park. You have no control over whether other drivers go in forward or reverse

Show quote history

Erm, the driver’s side is the side that the driver gets into the car. The driver’s side of the car, clearly. Nobody refers to the driver’s side of a parking space.

Original poster
Wertie · 16/07/2023 10:13

grass321 · 16/07/2023 08:58

I'm the other car. Mine is stupidly wide and so much bulky interior trim that I need a decent width to get out.

As a result, I park in the empty parts of the car park as I appreciate it's my issue. I also have restricted movement due to arthritis so clambering over the boot would not be easy. What then annoys me is when another car ignores the 40 empty spaces and parks right up next to my car. Just why?

I don't want my car to be scraped so I don't park in tight spaces where I think the other driver will struggle to open their door. Or I reverse in/go in forward if it means I can leave more room on their driver side.

Yes, I’m not an arsehole. If there’s a few space that’s wider I’m going to use it. I don’t want to risk rain and getting soaked as I shimmy in!

OP posts:
grass321 · 16/07/2023 12:30

Yes, I’m not an arsehole. If there’s a few space that’s wider I’m going to use it. I don’t want to risk rain and getting soaked as I shimmy in!

Fair enough. I also think it's basic courtesy not to choose a space where the other cars parked can't open their doors.

Good news is that my stupidly-wide car is in the garage for the fifth time this year (two months and counting) so it's not terrorising other car park users. Lesson learnt for my next car.

Original poster
Wertie · 16/07/2023 14:01

I’m not remotely fussed what others drive, I’ve never felt terrorised. I just don’t feel like I should take on the responsibility for their choices.
I can park and shimmy off as happy as Larry…

OP posts:
grass321 · 16/07/2023 14:49

But I think you do care about the size of the car if you're saying it's our fault for driving a wider car?

Would I be pissed off if you parked second and I couldn't get into my car? Yes, I would (I'm also pretty slim and able to squeeze through gaps where possible).

As I've said, I'd usually be in an emptier part of the car park for that reason. But if that's not possible, I'd hope not to be blocked in by another driver.

When I'm in a smaller car, I extend the same courtesy to larger cars if they're already parked. If they couldn't physically get into their car, I'd park elsewhere.