Roll your eyes at the drama!

[MondayblueFridayyellow]

Some of the parents in our children's class have very kindly organised a surprise leaving party for the year 6 children.
The 'surprise' has unfortunately been leaked by one of the children. One of the mothers has sent a message to the whatsapp group (please see below. I have changed the names)
Do you think this message is a bit over the top? I feel for whoever's child it is as they will now be picked on.

The Message:

Evening all I have some very upsetting and heartbreaking news to share with you. 😢💔

It’s come to my attention there a couple of children who have access to this and the other PARENT group chat and have spoiled the surprise. Especially one child in particular I know who the child is and feel like naming and shaming!
They have shared all the information from the day of the party, time, what’s happening there and the hoodies.
They have even shared the sizes and colours to the children and that is sensitive information.

Myself, Parent 1, Parent 2, Parent 3 have all worked incredibly hard over the past few months from calling venues, DJ’s booking things and surprises.
We also all work full time have so much going on in our personal lives and it hasn’t been easy.
To say the least I’m extremely hurt by this as we have even kept all of this away from our own children. It really feels like a kick in the stomach. It’s been so stressful and now I personally am fuming all hard work has been wasted.
Parent groups are for parents and there are other conversations on the groups that aren’t for children’s eyes or ears.
We have expressed time after time this is a surprise and that our children do not know.

The jumpers have been a nightmare amongst other things going backwards and forwards to suppliers etc.

I really really hope the person that has done this is ashamed of themselves and comes clean to the parents and apologises!

For me the excitement has gone and if this information had come out even a week ago no would have cancelled the whole thing.

The school haven’t taken on the stress of organising any of it and we stepped up if it wasn’t for us the kids would just be having that one last thing together at flip out and nothing else.

I’m sorry to rant but I hope you can all understand how hurt we are feeling.

💔💔💔

@CJat10 my intention wasn't to cause harm. It was too see others opinions.
How do I get the thread deleted?

Surprise parties are always for the people arranging them, so they can enjoy the reaction.

Like stupid sitcom plots where someone is ignored and feels down all day because no one remembers thewir birthday but then SURPRISE! There's a party after all and it's all nice.

Except it isn't, because those the party is for could have enjoyed anticipating it, made plans about outfits and expressed preferences etc.

The message is OTT because it calls the work "wasted" purely because the organisers can't have their dopamine hit of saying Surprise! The children still get the party, no work has been wasted whatsoever.

Witchhunting the parent or child who spoke about it is just petty.

I agree she was completely over the top and reading this was a bit cringeworthy... but I have to admit I too would be absolutely gutted if after all that work the surprise was ruined, so I totally get where she's coming from in that respect.

Miraculously not only
Are there two apparent posters in the group chat also but one also knows who the OP is. Unless there's only 3 of you in the chat I don't know how you could possibly identify the OP

OP don't worry about it. Who cares

Oh don't worry, I guarantee you that in a few years the parents will still be laughing about it, nothing to do with a thread on MB. It's amazing 😂

She sounds unhinged OP and so do the people on here saying you're mean for posting. People post threads about other people all the time.

If she woman didn't want such dramatic responses she had to be talked about she shouldn't have written such a batshit message. I think it's funny 😂 and even funnier there's another poster in the same WhatsApp group!

I don’t think anyone is laughing at the woman organiser per se, it’s more the fact that the OP found the reaction to the leaking of the surprise completely over the top and of course it is. She’s made the party entirely about herself. She may not think that but to post her displeasure in such inappropriate language has made her appear completely self absorbed. MN were asked their opinions. Some agree and some don’t

I know I'm a little bit older than 11 but I flippin hate surprise parties.

That’s hilarious.

Secondary school is so much better OP. The kids sort things themselves, no more contact with the crazy parents. 😬

You’re being deliberately obtuse. No one has said you’ve SAID anything unkind, it’s the act of posting a verbatim message that was intended only for the members of the WhatsApp group that was unkind.

Yes, the organiser was completely OTT and she’ll probably look back in a couple of weeks and cringe when the initial disappointment has dissipated. But further spreading the information so that we can all “eye roll at the drama” seems really mean-spirited. Surely you can see this?

@tunbridgeoutrage I have not been mean. I'm sure everyone in the WhatsApp group will have forgotten (which you are clearly part of). I'm not sure the child will forget.

Also I am not responsible for other peoples opinions on here. I have not been mean and I am happy for the post to come off. I did not know that it would be so popular.

tunbridgeoutrage · Today 15:01

OP. For being mean and posting something that everyone in the whatsapp group would have forgotten about by now.

PAH! They certainly would NOT! It will be remembered and giggled about for a long time

This WhatsApp tantrum will be the gift that keeps on giving

I would reply.

Didn't read your full message but your first paragraph sums it up, THEY ARE A CHILD! You are an adult so please don't name and shame and encourage bullying. I'm sure it was leaked through excitement and nothing else

plus op says this woman does amazing stuff for the kids, but feels it OK to criticise. Op, you are quite nasty to post this

Don’t get the thread deleted @MondayblueFridayyellow you have done nothing wrong.

I still don't understand why anything bad would happen to the child? The other children presumably all know who it is already, because that child has told them about the party. They might get in trouble if the organiser tells their mum they've been on her phone.

Jeezo, a child found out a secret and told their friends. It is hardly a hanging offence and neither the parent or child need outed or need to apologise. It is unfortunate and a bit of a shame if it ruined anything, but the adults should just get over it.

With a positive attitude the party can still go ahead and everyone will have a great time.

But, pull the crap in the message and it just makes everything awkward. The message reflects terribly on them. They are focusing too much on themselves and their "hurt" rather than the children, who probably don't give a toss whether it is a secret or not.

@MondayblueFridayyellow I think it's mean you've posted her WhatsApp message word for word which would easily identify her and probably embarrass her if everyone saw her being slated on mumsnet. Like I said I agree that she's a bit OTT but if she saw this thread she'd probably be upset and that would because you outed her on the internet, which I think is a bit mean. You could have discussed the situation with a bit more discretion or moved on like I'm sure most other people who read the WhatsApp have.

Thankyou. I really was not posting this to cause trouble. I just wanted people opinions and it has blown up.

How would she be outed? It’s an anonymous forum.

I don't think you've been particularly mean @MondayblueFridayyellow though other people have been. It's only outing for people who are already in the group chat and know who the woman is, and they've all seen it already (and presumably have their own opinion).

I think @tunbridgeoutrage has outed which town this school is in by her username!

I think it's mean you've posted her WhatsApp message word for word which would easily identify her

oh come on, this is becoming silly.

The people who have read the original message will recognise it. They already know about it (and probably shared it with a few friends for a laugh), and they know who wrote it. It's not an anonymous post on a group somewhere.

The people who don't have access to the whatsapp group aren't any wiser.

There's nothing "identifying" here.

Or she might take a minute and think if all these people think my reaction is OTT maybe I need to rethink how emotionally involved I'm getting in this.

Even if the person in the Op recognises her message - no one here still knows who she is in real life or knows who the OP is, other than a parent on the group.