Cakes and Treats at Work

[WhatTheFlipToDo]

I have worked at my current work place for about a year. I have been consistently a size 12 in clothes for two decades yet I have put on over a stone in that time and size 14 clothes are getting tight. The only variable between this job and my last one is a permanently well stocked table of ‘treats’. So, biscuits, those little M&S tubs of cake bites, donuts, Rocky bars. You name it.

It is a job where you end up incredibly tired sometimes and I have little will power around chocolate at the best of times but when I'm tired it’s a million times worse. Essentially, I eat far more sweet things now due to this bloody table of junk food. Obviously, as I eat things I replace them but then I just eat them again. I don’t know what to do. I’d like to ask the team to save treats for an actual occasional treat but, simultaneously, if I’m the only one who has no will power, is it fair to request they adapt their behaviour for me?

I feel the views in this article sum up my own well. https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2023/jan/17/people-should-not-take-cakes-in-to-the-office-suggests-food-watchdog-chief

Am I being unreasonable to want the team to cut back on the treats so I don’t get even fatter or is this my problem to manage? Genuinely contemplating leaving as I just will not be able to manage my weight without a change in workplace culture.

One bite would just open the floodgates for me. My old office used to do cake Friday (each staff member taking a turn to go to various places) and after a few months of this I said thanks for the offer but I’m going to opt out as I like a cake/dessert treat a week and look forward to having it when I socialise. Almost everyone agreed and one lady in particular took the huff that I had ruined her treat. I apologised if she felt that way but I didn’t really love a cake from greggs or a piece of Costco cake and I felt it was ok to opt out.

I think there needs to be a mindset change on snacking. We can't smoke anywhere near our site, and the Friday drinks beer fridge has gone, but the irresponsible promotion of cake and pizza lunches for staff in sedentary roles remains.

I have one line manager with iron willpower who brings in fruit, and is on the receiving end of a lot of banter because of it.

Countries where snacking is not a regular thing are thinner.

I work in a SEND school which is physically and mentally challenging and very different to an office environment, so i can’t speak for those who work in offices.

We have sweet treats at least once a week.

I always eat it but I don’t overeat on it because it’s for everyone and not just me.

I always bring in a healthy lunch and eat healthy at home so I can enjoy these treats without the guilt.

I also tend to not sit down after lunch because of my job but if I was in an office job I would try and get some exercise on my lunch break anyway after sitting down all morning.

I find that allowing yourself treats keeps you at a healthy weight.
I always struggled with my weight and it was only when I started eating treats as part of my diet did I lose weight and keep it off.

I also use MyFitnessPal just to keep an eye on my calorie intake and if I do happen to go a bit silly at work then I have a lighter meal in the evening or slightly less calories the next day.

Oh bugger off and learn some self control 🙄

You can’t compare drinking and smoking to snacking. Smoking causes cancer and affects everyone around you, drinking affects your faculties and thus your performance at work.

You don’t want snacks? Just don’t eat them. It really is that easy, but if you’re finding it so hard don’t try and punish everyone else around you for your own failings.

For me the word "treat" implies something that happens not very often, such as less than once a week.

Not every day or every other day!!

I worked somewhere similar. Just don't eat them.

Best thing I did was go vegan as suddenly I couldn’t have any of the office treats and I had an excuse as to why as sometimes people can pressure you to have something as well.

I hate the fact that if you don't want to eat something, there is some hilarious "banter", and you are expected to give a reason why you don't want to eat something.

I'm not a failure thanks. And I won't bugger off because you don't like my opinion.

The snackers who eat themselves into obesity related disease are crippling the NHS, so it is an irresponsible behaviour with effects on society.

Go and comfort eat that.

OP, I think you're getting a hard time. Of course it's up to the individual to exert self-control, but as others have said, there's a happy medium. Yes, you probably are being unreasonable to expect to veto snacks for everyone but I think the following 'rules' might help make it easier for everyone in the workplace:

• treats should be placed/located in a designated area away from the usual kettle and coffee machine - eg a cupboard somewhere you have to make a bit of an effort to go. I know from my experience that it's 'out of sight, out of mind' but if they're right next to the kettle and I'm tired, I'll struggle. Tough luck if they need to go in the fridge - people shouldn't bring in treats that need to be in the fridge!
• or as a compromise and a nod towards healthier culture, there should be designated occasions when treats are brought in, such as birthdays or celebrations related to the workplace (end of project, promotions etc etc).
• Whoever brought the treat in should be asked to take the leftovers home at the end of a day or possibly 2, or at least palm them off on someone else to take home.

Please don't suggest I'm a cake-fascist here - I do know I can't make rules. These are just my suggestions for a better work/treat balance which would help everyone to get what they want. We would be sensitive to people struggling with alcohol addiction etc and not leave bottles of booze around for them so, in view of the concerns about obesity, I think it's fair to make indulging in sugary snacks a definite, conscious decision and not put people who might be struggling to to the right thing through torture every day!

OP I agree with you. I worked in a place where it was socially acceptable to bring in treats all the time, anyone with leftovers brought them in, half eaten boxes of chocs after Christmas etc. The people who brought them in did not do so to be generous but to avoid eating them themselves at home and knowing that fools like me would eat them instead. Its all very well saying don't eat them but I would be sitting there constantly craving feeling anxious unable to focus because I could see them and I'd eventually cave. Yes it was my issue but it was unfair. The gambling analogy is accurate IMO. I never said anything but then a new manager brought in a healthy eating policy banning all sugary or fatty items in the office and had a bowl of fresh fruit arrive instead. Everyone said how relieved they were, it was amazing how many people disapproved of the former practice but didn't want to say.

I hear you OP, I've worked damn hard this past 2 years to lose weight, my willpower is totally shit if there's something I like put in front of me and due to where I sit in the office, they are in my view all day. Currently on said table are 4 packets of Bourbon biscuits, 2 packs of custard creams, tub of cornflake bites, tub of millionaires shortbread bites, tub of mini rolls, bags of pretzels, Jaffa Cakes. Fair enough eat them, but why can't they keep them on their desks or in their drawers?

I know it's my problem but when you've had eating disorders, binge eating, zero willpower, it's really annoying. I don't think about eating crap until it's right in front of me 😓

And this is daily.

My suggestion to get a fruit bowl and top it up daily (management would pay for this) was met with disgust lol

Ok, one problem with point 2. Where I work almost every F-ing day is a birthday, retirement, promotion, work celebration etc. etc.

I mean, my workplace in the UK was like what you describe. I get it. You're still being very unreasonable to expect your lack of control to be your colleagues' problem.

Of course YABU. Why should other people stop sharing snacks with one another just because you've put some weight on? It's not their problem.

The snacks are optional, not mandatory. You choose to eat them, and apparently in quantities that cause weight gain. That is your issue, not anyone else's. I've got terrible willpower when it comes to food, but I don't blame anyone else for that and I certainly don't complain when other people put a tub of M&S Brownie Bites on top of a filing cabinet. Nobody else has to modify their social eating habits to suit you.

I think there needs to be a mindset change on snacking. We can't smoke anywhere near our site, and the Friday drinks beer fridge has gone, but the irresponsible promotion of cake and pizza lunches for staff in sedentary roles remains.

That's not been done out of care for the health of the smokers or drinkers though. Smoking affects those around them (and I imagine they want to discourage regular smoking breaks from work as well), and drinking affects performance.

I'm not saying all the snacking is fine, but I doubt employers will care in the same way.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to answer my question. As someone whose weight has fluctuated over the years I do find this an interesting subject. I do agree that a little bit of what you fancy does you good but I feel treats are being pushed on us all the time. If someone offers me something they’ve brought in for their birthday or they’ve made themselves and I say no to it I feel awful. It’s like I was saying I don’t give a shit about your birthday and your home baking looks like crap. I don’t know why I feel like this. It’s not logical.

Which countries are these that don't snack and are thinner?

Be it free booze or cake etc, i see it as my choice how much i put in my body. It's up to me to exercise some form of self control

I hear you OP.
There is a HUGE snack culture at my work.
I have been bringing in my own pots of nuts as snacks. This way I can refuse the snack culture because I have my own healthy things without anyone raising their eyebrow at me, and I also share them around as they do the sugary treats.

Diversion tactics and no one is missing out or being cajoled. It's working so far.

Of course YANBU and I am flabbergasted at the comments.

The UK has an obesity crisis, I worked in an office like this and it's not just a simple case of saying no thanks.
Some people are really pushy and it's uncomfortable having to say no to them, even though you have said no like 3 times.
Some people have depression and are prone to comfort eating so not a simple case of "exercising some willpower".
Some people have binge eating disorders and can't limit themselves to just one..it's a compulsive act to eat to excess and hard to control.

So yes I think there needs to be a limit personally on how often unhealthy food is brought into the office.

Thanks, but I actually have the ability to regulate myself, and, astonishingly, willpower too!

So no comfort eating as a size 6 over here 😉

Some people being unable to regulate themselves should not mean it is spoilt for the majority who actually can.

it's uncomfortable saying no

That's at least part of the issue. The British culture of being seemingly uncapabale of saying no to other people, afraid to cause offence. That still doesn't mean that it's other people's responsibility to limit access to snacks. Personal responsibility and accountability is a thing. Or, it should be.

Am I being unreasonable to want the team to cut back on the treats so I don’t get even fatter or is this my problem to manage?

It's your problem. God nothing worse than some misery guts who moans about cake because they can't say no.

Its bad enough when you don't allow treats in the cupboards for your family at home because you can't stop at 1 portion, don't drag your coworkers into it too!