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AIBU?

Cakes and Treats at Work

494 replies

WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:19

I have worked at my current work place for about a year. I have been consistently a size 12 in clothes for two decades yet I have put on over a stone in that time and size 14 clothes are getting tight. The only variable between this job and my last one is a permanently well stocked table of ‘treats’. So, biscuits, those little M&S tubs of cake bites, donuts, Rocky bars. You name it.

It is a job where you end up incredibly tired sometimes and I have little will power around chocolate at the best of times but when I'm tired it’s a million times worse. Essentially, I eat far more sweet things now due to this bloody table of junk food. Obviously, as I eat things I replace them but then I just eat them again. I don’t know what to do. I’d like to ask the team to save treats for an actual occasional treat but, simultaneously, if I’m the only one who has no will power, is it fair to request they adapt their behaviour for me?

I feel the views in this article sum up my own well. https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2023/jan/17/people-should-not-take-cakes-in-to-the-office-suggests-food-watchdog-chief

Am I being unreasonable to want the team to cut back on the treats so I don’t get even fatter or is this my problem to manage? Genuinely contemplating leaving as I just will not be able to manage my weight without a change in workplace culture.

People should not take cake into the office, suggests food watchdog chief | Health | The Guardian

Food Standards Agency chairwoman likened culture to passive smoking, and said offices should be a ‘supportive environment’

https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2023/jan/17/people-should-not-take-cakes-in-to-the-office-suggests-food-watchdog-chief

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Notimeforaname · 14/07/2023 00:22

I have little will power around chocolate at the best of times but when I'm tired it’s a million times worse. Essentially, I eat far more sweet things now due to this bloody table of junk food

You are not overeating because of them. You are overeating because of you. You just said you have no willpower. It's you not them.

Ridiculous to want other people to cut back because you wont.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:26

But, if it wasn’t there I wouldn’t eat it. I have no issue regulating my food intake normally (in so far as I don’t buy it to have in at home and therefore don’t eat it) but don’t most of us struggle when there is ‘all you can eat’? Don’t most people come back from an AI holiday a little heavier? And this is my work place - I basically work next to the desert cart of an AI buffet!

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Pawpatrolsucks · 14/07/2023 00:28

It doesn’t work like that.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:28

(Dessert)

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M4J4 · 14/07/2023 00:28

I agree a regular table of food is much more tempting than having to go out and buy a treat, so I can appreciate the difficulty.

But if this table of food disappeared, would you not just transfer the temptation to something else?

I was a total sugar addict but I have managed to limit myself to a bite of cake at the office for a few months and have lost 25 pounds.

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blueshoes · 14/07/2023 00:31

Take a teaspoon of vinegar diluted with water before you eat those tasty sugary treats. Apparently helps to prevent sugar spikes.

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Notimeforaname · 14/07/2023 00:32

The problem is your lack of willpower and responsibility for your choices. Itll never be anyone elses fault what you put in your mouth, except yours.

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Notimeforaname · 14/07/2023 00:32

The problem is your lack of willpower and responsibility for your choices. Itll never be anyone elses fault what you put in your mouth, except yours.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:32

Being honest, no, I don’t think I would. I don’t work anywhere close to where I could go to get anything similar in the time I get for lunch so I’d just eat the lunch I brought from home, grab a cup of tea/coffee and be done with it. I don’t really need/want these things but they are there, right next to the kettle, calling to me!

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GlitterSquid · 14/07/2023 00:33

I work with a team of savages, there's a daily 'breakfast order' bacon butties, breakfast trays etc.
Then someone's off to Tesco and comes back with a bag stuffed with sharing crisps, donuts, hot chicken, the lot.
Then someone's brought in a huge bulk buy bag of reject wine gums from the local sweet factory.
Then its 'anyone want KFC/Maccies/Chippy/Domino's for lunch. DAILY.
Then its 'should we get kebabs' if it goes past 7pm.

I NEVER indulge. Ever. Not once. Honestly. It's a slippery slope!
It's just a stock 'no thanks'.

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Kiwiandstrawberries · 14/07/2023 00:33

Not very fair on the other staff if they go without because of your own lack of willpower! I work in a care home and the residents always have a freshly made sponge at tea time …I use my own willpower not to have a slice every shift. It’s a massive fail 5/10 shifts.

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Azandme · 14/07/2023 00:35

You want to control the adults in your workplace because you can't control yourself?

YABU.

You're contemplating leaving your job rather than working on your issue. If that isn't a big enough hint that you need to work on yourself, I don't know what is!

And what if you get another job and it's the same? Keep switching?

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Pawpatrolsucks · 14/07/2023 00:36

Pack a high protein lunch. It is easier to not eat if you are full. I am ok if I don’t eat any treats, but if I eat one I will just stuff my face.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:39

I’ve worked in a number of similar places over the last 15+ years and none have had the sheer quantity of cakes/biscuits daily! The odd cake for a birthday or a pack of biscuits to share on a Friday but this is a completely different level.

I’d be fine turning down the Dominos/Kebabs/breakfast cobs a previous poster mentioned. It’s just sugary things!

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Notimeforaname · 14/07/2023 00:41

OP the problem is not the people in your workplaces or what they choose to bring in. Leave your job if you want but unless you work alone from home, you cant control this.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:42

@Pawpatrolsucks Yep, I know the feeling! I just don’t want to have to feel like this at work all the time. It’s a crazy amount of food available all the time.

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EmotionalSupportWyrm · 14/07/2023 00:44

I've started volunteering at a place where the fridge is FULL - and I mean packed full - of chocolate treats for the volunteers, plus a big box of packets of crisps. We do 4-5hr shifts. I've done 10 shifts so far, not had a single snack or treat, and only seen two other people have any.

You have a choice.

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Deathbyfluffy · 14/07/2023 00:46

WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:26

But, if it wasn’t there I wouldn’t eat it. I have no issue regulating my food intake normally (in so far as I don’t buy it to have in at home and therefore don’t eat it) but don’t most of us struggle when there is ‘all you can eat’? Don’t most people come back from an AI holiday a little heavier? And this is my work place - I basically work next to the desert cart of an AI buffet!

Have some self control. It’s the same where I work, but just fight the urge.
This is a you issue I’m afraid

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:50

Yep, me and the chair of the Food Standards Agency! 🙂

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PoseyFlump · 14/07/2023 00:50

Go vegan 😂 it's the same in my workplace but none of the treats are ever vegan so it's easy for me to resist.

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WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:53

Ha ha! That’s what I suggested to DH I might do! Bet some well meaning team member would find some vegan biscuits for me!

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PoseyFlump · 14/07/2023 00:55

True 😂 don't tell them hobnobs are vegan!

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Sunsetandsunrise · 14/07/2023 00:59

WhatTheFlipToDo · 14/07/2023 00:50

Yep, me and the chair of the Food Standards Agency! 🙂

I agree with you. They are of course entitled
To bring in lots of sugary treats but it would be better for you, themselves and everyone if they limited this.

I used to work in social services, the office was filler with these kind of “treats” on an regular basis especially in the run up to Christmas, and after very stressful situations with young people it was very easy to grab another slice of cake.

I was very active back then and my job involved a lot of walking between schools and homes so I still stayed a size 8, but I don’t think all the snacks was good for my emotional or physical health. I think at one point a manager asked people to slow down on bringing in snacks.

it’s all very well people talking about having great restraint but some people have less self-control partly because of past trama
or ACES/ their upbringing /ND etc and they may be working on it but while they are it’s kinder not to have a table full of cakes staring at them every day.

I have never drank, taken drugs, gambled etc but I realised a while back food was my self-medication. I’ve taken steps to address this but glad I was able to do so without being in an office like the one I used to work in.

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AprilDecember · 14/07/2023 01:01

This is a you problem. Your employer and colleagues aren't your mum and dad.

I say this as a lifelong fatty. I've lost a couple of stone in the last 3 months even when the office is full of cakes, sweets, doughnuts, pizza and, frequently, booze, because at this point in my life being healthier is more important to me than stuffing my face. I still enjoy the odd scoff, but within my calorie limits. And I take a packed lunch every day so most of the food noise passes me by. I also came back from an all exclusive holiday just one pound heavier, again because I took responsibility for my own restraint.

I've been obese but that was my responsibility and my problem to fix. It wasn't for my colleagues to go without in the workplace. If it had been, I'm sure the blame would have been shifted elsewhere.

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AprilDecember · 14/07/2023 01:02

Inclusiv not exclusive

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