Please help with my addiction it is too much now

[meowed]

I am always on my phone. I’m a lone parent and have constant low level anxiety. I find myself scrolling for literally hours, 7-11pm just to avoid my thoughts after dc is in bed. I’m not really reading things properly on it! Even when he’s awake in the day I will have it glued to my hand, checking banking, texts, social media. I’m not really doing anything on it, it’s literally compulsive.

I’ve tried switching it off but then I have anxiety that I’m not contactable for family. My parents won’t accept me saying my phone will be off, they’d forget and then worry if I didn’t respond for a day.

I just want to cut back. It’s averaging a horrific number of hours a day. I feel so much better when I’ve had even fifteen minutes away from it. I feel so sad I can’t control it, anyone had this? What to do?

Keep yourself busy, put limits on apps that don't allow you to go past your selected usage.

Take up reading, find programmes to watch on tv, listen to music, find a hobby that you can do from home when DC is in bed. I feel so much better when I don't spend hours on my phone, and it's just a bad habit OP. What about housework? I always find it passes my evening very quickly for me. Some self care, bath, face mask, do your hair?

I also found deleting Facebook drastically reduced the length of time I spent on my phone.

They're made to be addictive aren't they. I use my phone too much. I have screen time limits set on it but they're too easy to override. I try to put it up high in another room. I find I'm on it less when I've got a book on the go.

Can you do an online course so you have some thing worthwhile to do in the evening?
Studying Open University free courses is a good way of learning new skills while slowly weaning yourself off mindless scrolling.

If you want to, you could go cold turkey, ditch the smartphone and get a basic ‘dumb phone’ that can call and text.

I’ve pondered it often enough myself.

Someone at work gave their smart phone to their son, put the apps on a tablet and used their “old school phone”.

The only thing that they still miss, is WhatsApp.

Get an old style non smart phone, just a Nokia 3310 which you can call and text on but no internet. Then your loved ones can get hold of you but no temptation to doom scroll. You don’t need a smartphone.

I'm v similar! Also a lone parent. Not sure if that makes a difference but I'm sure it must do a bit. I'm not accountable to anyone or have anyone to talk to after the DCs are in bed and it's lonely. The only thing that I have found helps a bit it listening to audiobooks. It has to be one that requires concentration or it's too easy to scroll when you are listening. But they do get me to sleep at night - I do also play a lot of on line scrabble - but it's still on my phone!! But seems more fun than just endless scrolling

I'm addicted to my phone (here i am!) But a book totally distracts. It's not actually that hard to be without it, it's not a chemical addiction (like smoking or drinking iyswim). It's really doable so back yourself 🤗

You can put limits on apps I believe (although they're easy to override). Alternatively rather than going a whole day, which makes your family worry, could you set yourself intervals? Get yourself a locker or box for home/work and say you will only check your phone at say 12.30 when you have lunch, and 5.30 when you finish for the day, and then once again at 10pm before you shut it off for the night. That way people aren't waiting long if they need a response.
Another option is to delete all but the most necessary apps so you're only using your phone for the basics.

I started listening to podcasts. Phone is on but it’s quite nice to listen to stuff whilst cleaning bathroom etc. I’m much more productive.

Stay focused app. Pay for the one off premium. Great app. I use it to limit distraction because my attention span is really bad and procrastination is even worse

Watching this thread because I’ve just overriden the limit I put on MN 🙄

I find it’s worst when I’m anxious or unhappy, the scrolling kind of fills up my mind and stops me thinking too much.

My attention span was always crap even before smartphones existed, not sure what the answer is!

@NoraLuka try that app above. You can't override it if you set it to strict

A smart watch helped me. Knowing I wasn’t going to miss emails/messages but being unable to call broke the habit.

Though I am on MN but that’s because DD2 has chicken pox so I’m off work, and all she wants to do is rest on my lap and watch Peppa 🤦🏻‍♀️

• unable to scroll

buy one of these and lock it away for the evening

https://www.amazon.co.uk/iDiskk-addiction-temptation-Multi-Function-Students/dp/B08HZ4LYHM/ref=asc_df_B08HZ4LYHM/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=475148984837&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=8060996593946896109&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006502&hvtargid=pla-1003104388307&psc=1

Turn off wifi and mobile internet so you can only make calls / texts. Delete all apps.

I'm terrible this way too. Whenever I find myself getting bad, I make my phone live in the top drawer in the kitchen where it's not easily reachable from the sofa. I can check it for messages whenever I want but I don't sit down with it. It goes back in the drawer.

Replace the smartphone with a Nokia or similar.

Turn off WiFi (change the password to some string of letters and numbers you can't remember and hide it in a difficult to access place)

Exercise - I find that really helps!

Do something creative - painting, knitting, whatever

Watch BBC iPlayer or a movie

I'm with you OP. I find myself going up to bed between 10 and 10.30pm at night but before I know it, I've been scrolling mindlessly on my phone for at least an hour and it's nearly midnight!
I'm re-reading the book "How to Break Up with Your Phone" on my Kindle just now - the research in the first section is very eye-opening and there are some really good ideas about how to be more mindful when using your phone instead of just mindlessly scrolling all the time.

I used to be a bit like this in the evenings then I took up crochet. It might sound silly but I could never even pay attention to watching a film or TV show, my mind was always wandering and whirring so I would be on my phone when watching something to calm it down. Now I crochet and watch something and I can follow along with tv shows and because I'm also busy crocheting there is no room left in my head for stupid thoughts and I have 2 new blankets. It's a bit niche so maybe it won't be your thing but it really has helped calm my mind.

I do that, I thought that was normal these days?

try to find a good tv series to watch instead of phone scrolling.