Exactly this really.
Been in a hybrid job for about a year. Go on visits and then do paperwork at home. whole things been dofficult (I miss having a workplace and working in a team )
Anyway added to this I can’t help but feel sexual chemistry/ tension with the manager. A few of the following things:
- Imtense eye contact.
- text messages outside of work days/ hours.
- Just a feeling. Like he will start off a convo when others are around all serious- like how’s the family- then huuuuge smiles, twinkly eyes etc
- goinf out of his way to find me
- double entendres
- when carrying out a visit together (literally only one we’ve done)- sparks when touching.
- awkwardness
- him blushing and getting all flustered
- him leaning in close, touching, brushing arms, and just seeming to be around a fair bit.
- glances accross rooms
sometimes I feel pretty excited about it but it’s wrong and no good can come of it. He’s my manager. I’m married with kids as is he.
So far I have tried focussing on his negatives, went for around a month avoiding the office so not seeing him and only communicating about it specific work things via teams, responded to one of his texts worth a very lighthearted reminder that it’s a day off and I’d see him in the office which stopped the out of work messages (I was enjoying them a bit too much) etc which I thought had worked- Then we had a work social which seems to have sent the whole thing into overdrive- worse than before- and since then I think it’s really bloody obvious.
Anyway I want to nip this in the bud because I think it’s affecting work (I honestly think he’s over valuing my work, is either incredibly supportive going out of his way to help or incredibly distant).
So thinking a little combo along the lines of ‘there’s nothing awkward here/ no beef is there?’ Just to acknowledge the situation without acknowledging how inappropriate it is without shaming anyone or
makinf it a HR issue etc.
AIBU to think this is a good idea? Or any other way of doing this? Thanks for reading this far.