To feel angry at celebrating the NHS

[TaylorSwifting]

The NHS is falling apart and today people are all full of glee at the NHS yippee 75 years today, it’s making me so angry!!!!!!!!!
My family member has been diagnosed with cancer, 2 months down the line and has had no treatment and terrible delays for tests…..still yet to see an oncologist. 2 months!!!!!!!!! Family member only has pain management because us family have begged and fought to get it. It is an utter disgrace and I had no idea how bad things were until this awful diagnosis in our own family.
We are not alone / it hasn’t been a mistake or being lost in the system by accident! Record high cancer patient delays - this is what so many people are facing. I am in utter disbelief!
I won’t be celebrating today.

Oh…and add to that demoralised staff leaving in droves in both the NHS and the social care sector too.

Theres not going to be enough staff for the thousands of people that need round the clock care… so what’s the plan realistically?

Wr have to open up more about death and the realities of old age. I know I sound heartless and clinical but I’m really not. Trust me - watching people fed by tubes, unable to do anything for themselves and Being on ABX 24/7 plus doubly incontinent and basically rotting away yet being kept alive at all costs isn’t something you would want for yourself, your parents or your children.

more needs to be done in changing this attitude that the NHS is there to keep all patients alive whatever the cost.

I agree but that’s about the family. Mine knows that in the event of my receiving a dementia diagnosis all bets are off. No condition of any kind is to be treated. My GP also knows it, there’s a document in my notes to that effect.

@Blossomtoes I agree. I have a couple of health conditions and have a TEP in place. Obviously it currently states that I am for resus. But should my conditions get worse, and they will as I age, I have already expressed me wishes to my kids and have written extensively that in the event of a stroke or something else that could leave me incapacitated, I want pain management and that’s it.

A dementia diagnosis is also included in my plan - as in I’d like to check out as quickly as possible and leave with my dignity intact. I don’t want to “live well with dementia”. Most people don’t even fully understand what that means and it’s a real rarity. Nearly all the patients I saw via work or see now as a patient myself, deteriorated very quickly and became a shadow of their former selves pretty sharpish. The amount of drugs you have to persuade them to take when they’re co bin Dd you’re poisoning them or they don’t understand the reasons why they need the medication… it’s heartbreaking and frankly, you wouldn’t keep a dog like that so why this incessant need to keep humans alive in this manner?

As you say it’s mostly down to the family but a lot of it is down to the NHS as well. There has to be changes across the board - not just in elderly care.

I see the elderly-basher has reappeared. Always one fart away from advocating euthanising your granny. Utterly repulsive.

I couldn’t agree more. Dementia really, really frightens me having seen my mum go through it. It’s absolutely horrific. To be fair, I had no problems with interference in her care, when she was dying there was no coercion to let her go into hospital and I was adamant that it was the last place I wanted her to be. The thing that made me really mad was having to get really shirty with an OOH doctor before he’d prescribe morphine for her. She was dying - who cared if she was constipated? Seriously?

I had a skirmish with a practice nurse because I refused a pneumonia vaccination because it confers lifelong immunity. She couldn’t get her head round anyone foreseeing that pneumonia might be very welcome one day.

More utter rubbish! I know a lot of people over 80 and the majority are doing just fine, out and about, socialising, living alone and coping well.

From your posts it seems you really know very little about aging.

I think that poster has been pretty provocative throughout this thread. It would be a mistake to give any of their posts much credence.

This particular poster has a very black and white view of aging, and doesn't seem to have a clue regarding the fact that if you treat someone to give them quality of life it actually saves money in the long run.

Whoops - I should have said "that" particular poster - I didn't mean you @Blossomtoes

@Blossomtoes yeah, no dementia is an absolute no from me.

Im sorry if I’ve offended with my posts - it’s not granny bashing. I’m all for anyone fit and healthy to live their best life whatever age. My mum is 78 and a lot fitter than me because she has no illnesses.

But from working in the sector for over a decade, and now being disabled myself, I’ve seen the care on offer and I don’t want it for me. I don’t want it for my mum ( neither does she) and I didn’t Want it for my dad either. He was poorly for a long time with various illnesses, on o2 24 hours a day pretty much, no quality of life at all and then came a bowel cancer diagnosis. The drs offered him treatment!!! ( As Dad said to me on the phone, “they can fuck that. What’s the bloody point??”

He said outright to his Consultants “absolutely no treatment”, signed an updated DNR regarding hospital admission and resus and then dropped dead about 3 months later.
No more pain, no more suffering and no more indignity. Surely that’s what we all want? A good death?

But by continuously intervening in nature’s course, we are just prolonging agony. It’s not granny bashing - it’s being realistic.

Oh and also, if you saw the amount of unused medication that goes in the yellow bags for incineration every month in homes up and down the country as well as hospitals…this costs the NHS millions a year.

If we don’t start being open and realistic about what the NHS should be treating, there will be no NHS left, it’ll all be privatised and we will all be fucked. The change isn’t going to happen within the NHS and certainly not within this shitshow Government. Therefore, the changes have to start with us.

Agree. When a GP came out with a sonorapher (who needs 7 days to produce a report) but should have said as knows far more the then GP or gynae, what the hell in 2023.

Yeah there’s some people on here who clearly don’t know many “elderly” people. These days there are many who are thriving in their 80s with very little medical interference because of access to healthcare when they have needed it.

what about the people who flat out refuse to see a doctor when they need something checked, refuse to wear sun cream, take illegal drugs, smoke, vape, don’t exercise, have a poor diet, are morbidly obese, injure themselves doing risky activities… the list goes on. There are thousands of people with avoidable illnesses but they never think it will be them. What about the money they use up, the services they are are overcrowding?

I think another issue is that it varies so wildly from trust to trust and the whole “postcode lottery” thing is dreadful.

Did I say that or even hint at it? If so do show me where.

If you're angry, stop voting tory.

If only it was that simple
the bigger problem is there’s a lack of personal responsibility for our health we are one of the fattest and unhealthiest populations hence the massive demand

no one wants to pay anymore look at the outcry over the NI increase

the NHS literally burns through money because they waste a staggering amount ask anyone who works for

to be blunt people who think it’s literally don’t vote Tory are delusional if they think that’s the fix

Agree. The system is unfair.

THIS!

Despite me and DH paying into it all our lives and never really needing it, the TWO times we have needed it, it hasn't been there for us and we have had to rely on private medical insurance which, ultimately, saved our lives. I frankly would have died if my care had been left to the NHS.

Sorry, but it's not the 'sacred cow' people want to believe it is.

To be honest if they have this attitude let them go… let them go and tell Aussie over 65s they don’t deserve a chance to live or say goodbye, and leave the decent doctors here

I wouldn't call it worship . Constantly getting an ear bashing or abuse from people like you and a shit salary.

Offensive or not, this viewpoint is broadly where my mother ended up after nigh on 40 years as a GP. I don’t know what the answer is. I do know that chucking resources at people who have lived long lives but whose minds have gone while neglecting children and families is not serving us well.

It’s not offensive. What is offensive is the suggestion made earlier in the thread that all people over a certain age have no quality of life and would be better off dead.

I think looking at it on a case by case basis is the way to go. I'm 55 and in good health, but if I were diagnosed with dementia or a major form of cancer, I'd DNR myself like a shot. But then I work in the NHS (non-clinical) and have done the MERC, so I have some slight inkling of what CPR really involves. And in real life it's way worse.

Solidarity re the cancer treatment, @TaylorSwifting. I recently lost a dear relative much too young. So much back-and-forth leading to late detection, treatment delays, missed problems etc - it really was a shambles and we were quite shocked by it. Hope your family member has a good outcome.

That wasnt what was said at all and you know it.