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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do the people on here lie about their size?

133 replies

qualitychat · 02/07/2023 21:20

Anytime I am in AIBU everyone seems to be a size 12 and under. They exercise, don't drink and eat a very healthy diet. I have been looking at the Style & Beauty section. The vast majority of posters are plus size. Am I missing something?

OP posts:
VyeBrator · 02/07/2023 21:53

I'd say it's a bit the opposite on MN, OP.

I seem to be forever reading people saying they struggle with their weight, which makes sense given over 60% of the UK population are overweight.

What I do find a tad strange is how many people claim their kids are built 'like a rake', given the rise in childhood obesity.

VyeBrator · 02/07/2023 21:55

TrueScrumptious · 02/07/2023 21:30

On here, if you are slim, you’re accused of competitive undereating.

This is also often true.

EvilElsa · 02/07/2023 21:58

qualitychat · 02/07/2023 21:48

As women we are obsessed with our weight and size. I go out a lot with three other couples and their DHs. They all go on about their weight - we are all menopausal. None of the men are slim but they don't give a toss. Why do we torture ourselves?

Because you only have to look at a women's magazine from the 80s/90s (and before, but I mention these as I happened to watch a YouTube video the other day of the old teen mags like Mizz and More) to see how toxic the content about weight was.
Articles interviewing men about their opinions on "real women" bodies and faces. Diet ideas, ways to look slimmer, movies about the fat person being the loser and the joke, fashion aimed at the very slim, heroin chic. It's actually shocking to look back on. It's been pushed on us for years and years. Not just weight, but having the perfect make up and perfect boobs and perfect hair. It's not surprising we have issues.
When I was at my most unhealthy I got the most compliments about my figure. It was difficult to come away from that, vanity wise I will admit.

bellac11 · 02/07/2023 21:59

TrueScrumptious · 02/07/2023 21:30

On here, if you are slim, you’re accused of competitive undereating.

Equally on here if you're fat or losing weight somehow you have disordered/dysfunctional eating

mondaytosunday · 02/07/2023 22:06

I don't find people lie about there size - at least there seems to be plenty of people saying they are size 18 plus asking about diet advice.
But it does seem like no one drinks - 'oh I drink maybe one glass a month' and if you say you drink a bottle a week you are 'binge drinking and need help' (as I sit here polishing off a bottle of delicious red).

NewPinkJacket · 02/07/2023 22:06

bellac11 · 02/07/2023 21:59

Equally on here if you're fat or losing weight somehow you have disordered/dysfunctional eating

Show quote history

And if you don't allow your kids to snack, you're controlling and will give them an eating disorder.

PurpleBananaSmoothie · 02/07/2023 22:08

If you’ve been on MN for any length of time, you’ll know AIBU doesn’t leave you feeling great about yourself, even if you didn’t start the thread you can still find a comment that makes you fee shit about yourself. So for me, any sort of weight related topic in AIBU I avoid like the plague. I don’t need to read a hundred comments about how I’m lazy, lack discipline, fucking disgusting and generally a drain on society. It doesn’t make me like myself any better and any attempts to lose weight need to start with bettering your own relationship with yourself.

Style and beauty is a different environment. People only go in there if they are interested in those topics and so the environment is generally supportive or helpful constructive criticisms. If someone is feeling insecure about their body, they will likely head to a supportive environment on how best to style it.

EmeraldFox · 02/07/2023 22:12

mondaytosunday · 02/07/2023 22:06

I don't find people lie about there size - at least there seems to be plenty of people saying they are size 18 plus asking about diet advice.
But it does seem like no one drinks - 'oh I drink maybe one glass a month' and if you say you drink a bottle a week you are 'binge drinking and need help' (as I sit here polishing off a bottle of delicious red).

Disagree about the drink. There was a thread about how many bottles of wine for five? people and there were suggestions of 6 bottles of red and 6 of white.

Ellie1015 · 02/07/2023 22:12

I think the people on style and beauty give their size because it is important to the advice they are asking for. So you will get a wider range.

The people who are comfortable about their size will give that information as part of their advice on other threads. More often these will be 10-12 people as that is the number not seen as too big or too small.

MilitantMommyBFArmy4Life · 02/07/2023 22:15

JockTamsonsBairns · 02/07/2023 21:29

Don't know about pp themselves, but I'm never sure about how everyone seems to have teenagers who "inhale" vast amounts of food, but are beanpoles.
I have four older brothers. My mother could never have afforded for them to inhale food - everything in the fridge was earmarked for a meal. They were all active, but none of them were beanpoles.

I suppose I just don't understand the science behind it? And it doesn't stack up with the teenage obesity stats.

Some people can eat healthy and are still bigger

Some people eat loads and gain slowly and are thin

It's exactly the same both ways

Height plays a big role, and sometimes people are just built a certain way

BogTrollAtLarge · 02/07/2023 22:15

Persiana · 02/07/2023 21:49

Maybe larger sizes post on style and beauty because it really is harder to find well fitting clothes that flatter larger sizes? I'm not criticizing larger sizes, just that I've noticed they are usually looking for advice

I think this is right- I used to be thin and finding clothes was easy, I never really struggled to find what I wanted- now I’m very fat I’m often thinking ffs where can I get xyz thing. It’s much better than it used to be though in terms of availability.

radiatorpipe · 02/07/2023 22:16

I love the way everyone is the same size as Kate Middleton 😆 But then everyone has sons who well over 6 ft & stunning daughters. Plus they could read at 4 months.

I don't think it's lying as such just perhaps a trip
to Specsavers is needed.

SabrinaThwaite · 02/07/2023 22:17

From observation S&B is about providing practical advice about clothing that suits your shape and style.

AIBU will tell you all kinds of things that are irrelevant to your question, and won’t make you feel better about anything.

radiatorpipe · 02/07/2023 22:17

Also there's a weird obsession with size on here when size is really only relevant once you take into account height. A size 10 who is 5ft 2 looks quite different to a size 10 who is 5ft 10

MelonsOnSaleAgain · 02/07/2023 22:18

I don’t think I’ve really talked much about my size and weight on here. It’s not really that relevant to stuff I want to chime in on. I haven’t weighed myself in over a year and it’s not something I worry about. I’m naturally slender, not sure why I’d need to lie about it.

radiatorpipe · 02/07/2023 22:21

On here, if you are slim, you’re accused of competitive undereating.

Nope the competitive undereating is to do with the "I only have carbs once a wk", "fruit is my treat" 🙄

Plus loads of posters manage to exercise for 2 hours, work, cook from scratch, take their dc to activities & DH also gets to do his hobbies daily. Oh and see friends. It's like Quantum Leap
is real!

Mummylovesmonkeys · 02/07/2023 22:22

qualitychat · 02/07/2023 21:20

Anytime I am in AIBU everyone seems to be a size 12 and under. They exercise, don't drink and eat a very healthy diet. I have been looking at the Style & Beauty section. The vast majority of posters are plus size. Am I missing something?

65 year old grandma, size 22/24 and drink like a shoal of 🐳🐟 I believe the last 2 are linked 😂

AllOfThemWitches · 02/07/2023 22:22

BeverlyHa · 02/07/2023 21:22

it is very easy to slim down once you just stop the bread and cake.

😆😆

MavisBeacon1234 · 02/07/2023 22:23

BeverlyHa · 02/07/2023 21:22

it is very easy to slim down once you just stop the bread and cake.

Take a day off please

radiatorpipe · 02/07/2023 22:23

The other conundrum is all the 6 figure salaries but the mortgage threads are always full of people with tiny mortgages

CallieQ · 02/07/2023 22:24

I'm a size 16!

lljkk · 02/07/2023 22:29

We're all sensitive to something different.

What I can't reconcile and seem to encounter loads, is people about my height who say they are 20-40 kg heavier than me "but don't look fat."

Yeah sure you don't love. I'll just sit on my hands & not type a response to that one.

Terryer · 02/07/2023 22:31

Everybody lies

(House)

BogTrollAtLarge · 02/07/2023 22:31

lljkk · 02/07/2023 22:29

We're all sensitive to something different.

What I can't reconcile and seem to encounter loads, is people about my height who say they are 20-40 kg heavier than me "but don't look fat."

Yeah sure you don't love. I'll just sit on my hands & not type a response to that one.

Do you get the urge to tell them they must look fat?

TroysMammy · 02/07/2023 22:33

I don't lie. I'm 55 and 1/4 inch under 5 foot. I weigh 10.5 stone. My boobs have grown over the years and I'm 34E. I usually wear size 14 but my work top is size 16 as it's polyester and I don't want it tight under my armpits. I recently bought a size 18 top from Tu as I didn't want it showing lumps and bumps and my shoe size is 4. I enjoy food, I don't exercise and I don't give a stuff about what people think of me.