My SIL makes me feel uncomfortable

[mummypie17]

I am close with my brother and I generally get along with his wife. We have a WhatsApp group together and try to meet up when we can. However, she sometimes indirectly makes comments about my parenting and compares it to her own sister (who she admires deeply).

Some examples:

I put my ds in nursery when he was 2 years old whilst I was working. SIL's sister didn't put her ds into pre-school until he was nearly 4 (which is absolutely not an issue as to each their own). She will tell me that it's so much better for kids to not go to nursery until they're older and she'll ensure she does the same as her sister.

I have never sleep trained my 2 DS. My SIL will tell me how she's sleep-training her DD like her sister did and I should consider it to make my life easier.

I gave my 5 year old DS a chocolate cookie and she commented that her sister's DC don't even know what chocolate is.

I obviously won't say anything to my brother as I don't want to cause a rift. My brother has told me that his wife has always been in awe of her older sister. This is fine but I don't see what it has to do with me.

Would it be unreasonable for me to just distance myself from her as sometimes after speaking to her, I feel uncomfortable?

“Thanks for your concern but I am happy with the way I chose to parent my child thanks”

… said very calmly and evenly … not snarkily … but look her in the eye when you do it and sit up a bit. And don’t be tempted to fill the silence afterwards. She’ll get the message hopefully.

I know this is an old post but it's popped up.

What did you do, did you distance yourself or have it out with her? I personally couldn't keep my gob shit, I'd be having the the b*tch!

We can't always avoid family so I think it's best to say something. Tell her the way she is always making comments sounds like she is trying to undermine you as a parent and her comments aren't appreciated. Her comment about your mum is awful, she's saying these things because she can, you are letting her away with it. Stop her NOW!

Shut not shit

The main question I have is why don't you say anything? There are loads of great responses on here. Some funny, some put downs.

She speaks freely to you. Sounds like she says exactly what she wants. You don't respond. Why the imbalance?

You allow it. That's not a positive relationship to be in or to have your children around.

You're right, she's testing you. Like a bully.

Firstly and most importantly......go smuggle that kid some chocolate in 😅 secondly laugh it off let her be in awe. I on the other hand would have to find fault with some things just to shove that in her face ie...gasp 4yr + oh dear u do u realise that could impact in there social skills bla bla but hey I'm petty 😁