Punching boy at school

[BackAgain2023]

Looking for some advice... there's a boy in 6yo DS class who keeps hitting him (and another couple of children) and calling him names. It's been going on off and on since the start of the year. DS tells the teacher each time and has been trying to stay away from him. Previously the teachers had been encouraging everyone to include him but I've given DS permission to not play with him as he won't stop hitting him.
I know the child and his parents well unfortunately so it's quite awkward. I've spoken to the school and I don't feel they're taking it seriously tbh.
DS friends parents have given their wee boy permission to now punch the boy back and they'll deal with any trouble from the school. My husband thinks we should tell DS to do the same thing and that it's just self defence and if the school won't do anything then DS needs to protect himself.
It feels so wrong telling my child to punch someone but maybe this is the only way the boy will leave him alone?
For further info, the boy has no known special needs but has a bit of a chaotic household and siblings with special needs. He seems like a very angry child which is sad but I need to protect my child from being assaulted on a near daily basis.

DS couldn't have effectively hit back as he was a lot smaller and lighter and would not have been confident to do it. The only choice I had was to blow up at the school. It helps that I'm a confident professional able to assert myself with headteachers, I realise not everyone wants to do that.

After years of bullying , one of my DS's thumped the bully in the head and literally nearly killed him. It is easy to cause horrific injury by punching someone.

1. Primary school children are not going to kill another child by punching them.
2. It's a risky business being a bully. Live by the sword, etc...

The boy quite badly hurt another child yesterday. No doctors required but an ice pack and had to be collected from school early. After that he still had the chance to kick my son and to try and punch him.

I’m the very opposite of combative and confrontational. I’m actually a bit wet and people pleasey, but the way I would blow up at the school for allowing this to continue would be one of epic proportions. This is just not okay, your child has a right to be safe in his school and it’s the schools job to safeguard their students! They’re failing at that evidently.

This child clearly isn’t going to stop so I think you’d need to really kick off or take it further. I’m unsure where you could turn to if there’s no governor’s though? That makes it very difficult. Maybe you and the other hurt child’s parents could work together to make the complaint?

The boy quite badly hurt another child yesterday. No doctors required but an ice pack and had to be collected from school early. After that he still had the chance to kick my son and to try and punch him

This is sounding really serious. I would be looking at forming an action group and getting a group of people in front of the head teacher. It is only a matter of time before he hits somebody that falls badly and gets seriously hurt.

Do they have facilities to get this kid on solitary confinement?

Primary school children are not going to kill another child by punching them

The punch is not the problem. A subsequent falling and hitting your head as a result most cetainly can.

Far more likely to fall and hit their head from being forcefully pushed which is what many are advocating as the way to deal with the bully.

A punch in the face from a young child is extremely unlikely to have enough force to floor the bully but would hopefully bust their lip or smash their nose, etc.

What a move from an 8 year old

I love all the posts saying for the child to hit the bully back instead of reporting it to a member of staff🤣

@ButterCrackers
''The bully’s parents can pay for your babysitting costs''
That's a funny idea lol

*Teach him how to box.

I punched my bully in the nose when I was in year six after she cornered me and started hitting me. She left me alone after that. Wish I had done it four years earlier.

As a teacher. tell him to punch back.

The best option is to push away and say, “Stop it X!” so an adult can hear. Keep a diary at home of when it happens as well. This can be very helpful to the school, especially if you include what’s happened immediately before and after the child is hitting people. You say there’s no known SEN but it’s relatively rare to get a diagnosis at that age, there may well be one further down the line. There may also be consequences for the child that others aren’t aware of so it’s not certain that he’s getting away with it.
Interesting how many people are referring to the child as a bully. Bullying has a very specific definition which isn’t really being met here. The behaviour is clearly unacceptable but requires something different to the bullying policy.