Fatty McFat Face - help

[Usertumster]

AIBU to think I can turn my weight around?

I’m 5’3 and 18 stones. I know.

I have two pairs of jeans that I wear on rotation. Both now have “chub rub” holes at the top. I have 3 long sleeved tops that I wear on rotation.

I'm pretty much a size 20/22.

I’ve lost weight and put weight back on. Before children I was a trim size 10. I weigh so much more now than I did when 40 weeks pregnant!

Today is the first day when I’ve felt overwhelmed with the heat.

People say “gosh, aren’t you hot in jeans!” “Put some shorts on!” etc etc etc. 99% of the time they mean well but it’s SO depressing - I don’t have shorts and they would look so awful that I wouldn’t wear them. Ditto skirts (they really looks bad) but also the chub rub would mean I couldn’t walk for more than a few minutes without a lot of pain.

Im so over it all. And yet apparently not enough to lose weight.

So yeah. Help? And if you have a fat friend in jeans, don’t ask why they’re not in shorts. Please.

I have done Fast 800 before which worked. It’s just sticking to it that’s tough. I don’t have a partner and no one to cook for me. DC too young to cook and obvs I need to cook normal meals for them (they’re healthy weight and sporty).

Im better if I’m on a plan that I know what I’m having every day. Fast 800 ended up with me eating a mainly vegan diet and I felt amazing. Why do I go back to cake….

Thanks for reading this far.

Practical stories of help/people who have lost this amount of weight are welcome. So are tips for dressing a short fat mummy in the summer. Links would help too!

Slimpod and chub rub shorts from https://www.thebigbloomerscompany.co.uk/ or snag is what you need. Then you can frock your way through summer.

I agree you need to be kinder to yourself, not make jokes at your own expense and allow yourself some nice clothes that are comfortable and fit well. It's going to be easier to make some lifestyle changes if you are not feeling unhappy. Not saying you have to be super happy all the time, but not having too many things that get you down. Being nicer to yourself and making some changes to improve your situation not just try to improve yourself. Are you getting some time to relax and do some fun and interesting things you enjoy? As a mum sometimes all your time and energy is given to others and you end up exhausted and eating some high energy snack you can just grab. Or it could be that you are stuck at home with the kids feeling a bit lonely and comfort eating. It's going to be a lot easier to form good habits if you first find some ways to make life a bit nicer for yourself.

Snag tights shorts. Get that, and some clothes you’re comfortable in, then you might feel like moving around more. Jeans are so uncomfortable.

maybe just be nice to yourself and think practically- get come tracksuit bottoms and go for a walk. Primark do thin ones for summer.

Fast 800 is great for2 weeks to give you a kick start and to get you used to being conscious of your calories and weighing/measuring food. I have never found it sustainable long term because I start feeling deprived and then I fall of the wagon.

Do a TDEE calculator online, that will tell you how many calories your body needs to exist, take 500 off that and use it as your daily allowance. Mine is 1700 a day and I'm losing about 2lbs a week eating that.

Increase your activity by doing brisk walks or vigorous gardening or whatever gets you moving and raises your heart rate about 3 times a week for 30 mins.

Reduce carbs because they decimate your calorie allowance and don't leave you feeling full. Eating protein and fat will fill you up more and be lower calorie.

Keep low calorie, easy to grab foods in the kitchen. Boiled eggs ready to go in the fridge, beef jerky, portion of homemade bolognaise (5% fat pork mince, loads of mushrooms, carrots, tomatoes or whatever other veg to bulk it out) in the freezer. That way you won't default to a bag of crisps or chocolate bar for convenience.

Ps, laddered tights cut into cycling shorts, are great under dresses. My dad wears them to school. Feels better than just underwear.

dd, not dad. Christ.

Honestly I was like you but there ARE clothes out there now that fit. I'd check out YouTube for inspiration. I don't know her and am not promoting her but check out "I'm just me Marleen" on YouTube. She has saved me. I have dresses nowI have all sorts . Your best friend is chub rub shorts. They have changed my life and I'm not joking lol. U can wear them under dresses and be comfy all day long. Layers are your friend. Shein has been my savior. Take your measurements and order some dresses off shein. Don't worry what size they are. Get some chib rub shorts on Amazon or even primark. I wear a light shirt over a dress if I'm conscious of my arms. It doesn't need to close wear it like a jacket. Check out Marleen though she honestly changed my life and my wardrobe ha ha.

Get some of those loose fitting cotton jumpsuits from amazon, and some long floaty dresses and some chub rub/cycling shorts underneath

Noom, my fitness pal, any calorie counting style diet will be best for maintaining weight loss

Lol imagining your dad wearing cut off tights under his trousers to school ha ha ha

Ah it's so hard. I'm 5ft2 and a 16/18 - have just lost a bit of weight and hoping to lose a lot more.

I've found that although I am very curvy - particularly my thighs and bum are big - tight midi/maxi skirts with a loose top work quite well. Then I feel like I'm not (and I know I shouldn't feel this way about my body, but I do) forcing people to see loads of skin. I wear shorts underneath - you can actually buy them in most places now eg I'm sure some of mine are from M&S, primark would prob do them too. They're slightly thicker than tights material so you don't get too hot.

Next have lovely comfy linen trousers in, they do a petite length as well. Having to get over my fear of tight T-shirts but it doesn't actually look too terrible (hopefully!)

I get weight off by walking - 13,000 steps a day will do it.
A friend uses the Zoe diet: https://joinzoe.com/ They pay for it but I believe there may be a free version.
Another friend uses the 5/2 diet: https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/howto/guide/what-52-diet

Oh also, I have a few pairs of leggings from Love Leggings (think they've recently changed names but if you google they'll come up) - they do petite lengths and do capri, 7/8 length etc which I think look quite flattering on me compared to normal leggings - not quite sure how they're different! They're not see through as well and have a sort of panel at the tummy which makes me feel really secure and comfy.

Same size and weight as you and I know how you feel - I know what works, I just can’t bloody stick to it because I don’t see results quick enough!

Clothing wise, I wear dresses with chub rib shorts underneath or cropped leggings. Funny you mention Fatface as I live in their cropped chinos in a variety of colours. Also have some really nice jumpsuits but be careful - Popsy ones make me look like a tellytubby whereas Sugarhill Brighton ones and randomly one I got from Shein look great. You have so many options; you don’t need to be in jeans. Don’t torture yourself!

It must be really hard, it's so hard to break bad habits, I think even harder when you're single so you can literally do whatever you want with no immediate judgement.

Do you meal plan?

Also, have you asked the GP for help? They can sometimes issue diet plans for free if you qualify

If you want to lose weight then I think the best way is to find out your TDEE and work on reducing your calorie intake and maybe upping your activity a bit if you want to, even if it's just walking.

I'm currently in a calorie deficit and I'm still eating the things I enjoy, just smaller portions or slightly modified versions.

Beyond that I'd say wear what you're comfortable with, don't worry about what other people think. If you want to wear a dress/shorts etc then do x

Well starting with the heat … I hate to break it to you but wrapping your body in heavy stifling fabrics isn’t hiding your shape. You may feel like covering it is, but it isn’t . You’d do well to get yourself a couple of floaty maxi dresses as all the girls I know who are larger look good in them and they’ll keep you cooler. I’ve lost lots of weight and kept it off simply by maintaining a slight calorie deficit and going for a stroll in the evening at the usual time I got the munchies. It was double effective because I wasn’t eating and I was gently exercising at the same time. Also I shrank reasonably neatly and didn’t end up with loose skin because it was steady and slow. Bin the jeans. What are you wearing on your feet? I felt that lightweight , proper sports shoes made me feel lighter and more inclined to move around than more feminine sandals and shoes, so go for the trainers and summer dress look for a while it doesn’t have a size or age limit . Batch cook so that the kids can have reheated meals and you’re not tied to the kitchen so much. And please please remember that lots of women are your size and nobody other than you really cares so just enjoy life and try to be active , go swimming, take up a sport you fancy because you won’t be the only heavier one there and it absolutely is the way to improve your health and happiness.

Also remember that no one knows the size of the clothes you are wearing.
Buy something that fits and is comfortable, work on your health of course, but don't focus on the garment sizes while you are working on being back to your healthy body.

This isn’t what you’ve asked, but Snag make a brand of thin tights in “shorts” style which they actually call “chub rub”. Game changing for wearing with dresses and skirts.

Buy yourself a couple of pairs and some nice jersey cotton dresses on vinted and enjoy the summer. Whatever your weight you deserve to be happy and to live your life.

If you start feeling better, getting out there walking, you will also find it easier to diet. It’s a win-win

Loose cotton trousers are cool and flattering .No need for jeans (so un comfy anyway!) Im quite short and plump (not fat!) Be nice about yourself .Yes I could do with losing weight now and then ( Who couldnt)! but buy the best makes I can afford(On E Bay ) and usually "size up" Apparently looser clothes are more flattering.Lots of ladies arent "fat" but have a rounder shape when they have had DC

You can do this OP, but your family need to be on side and support you all the way. Get a bin liner, and chuck out ALL the rubbish food and UPF. Chocolate, crisps, biscuits, ice cream, you name it, it's gone. See a dietician and get him/her to draw you up a sensible diet plan that you feel you can stick to.
Exercise - get a friend to join you. It doesn't have to be the gym, find something you enjoy doing and make it fun.
You can do this!

Get yourself some light-weight crops that cover your knees. Size 18/20 isn't that big really but I get the heat can be oppressive.

Can you do 800 on just a few days a week as a permanent thing?

Or 16/8 is good.

Hi Op
I recommend the work of Paul McKenna for weight loss
Book - I can make you Thin (comes with code for nightly hypnosis or CD)
App - Thin which cover the same system as the book but with daily and nightly guided meditation (£7.99)
The bottom line is you can eat whatever you want, whenever you want as long as you savour every mouthful, chew at least 20 times and when you think you’re full - Stop 🛑
Paul McKenna will explain why diets don’t work and why weight returns - his system is intense as in you have to keep at it for life and get used to being unpopular because you will likely eat five mouthfuls and be full or take longer to finish your food than everyone else- but it does work.

For exercise I recommend Les Mills. I found them during lock down and just use the online videos - they do beginner to advanced plans of 4-6 week, after two weeks the stored fat of my back and middle was melting away without any diet restrictions.
I stopped for a couple of years but recently restarted- and same again, 2 weeks in and it changes your body composition. They show you variations and you just work to your own level. They also have guidance on the best food to feelgood and they have a gorgeous meditation series.

I hope these help 💐

I can't walk far due to injury but have a gym membership and am swimming every day gradually building up the time after illness. I think it's about finding an activity you can do and doing it regularly

Honestly all the fasting/low carb/quick fixes are why I ended up obese in the first place.

I can eat enough cheese in one day to gain weight.
I can eat in enough in a “six hour window” to gain weight.

i saw it as a way of justifying my overeating and still expected to lose weight.

what worked for me is subscribing to a diet plan. I used diet chef mainly because it was cheapest. I got a 3 month deal, and offset against what I normally spent on food anyway if wasn’t that expensive.

so portion sizes controlled. Days eating set out the night before. Breakfast, lunch and dinner, snack, plus fruit and veg. I’d normally do a stir fry or a salad with the evening meal to bulk it out.

i laid off the exercise apart from walking as much as possible, because exercise makes me HUNGRY. You are allowed to offset, eg 40g of rice with evening meal if you’ve done a 10k run or whatever, but I am better mentally if I stick to the meal plan exactly.

lost 2 stone in those 3 months. I’ve continued with a more flexible version on my own, but it reset my eating habits and portion size completely. I recognise the feeling of hunger, and when to eat before I go past it into binge mode.

I’ve lost another stone since, sticking to the toast or cereal for breakfast, soup or salad for lunch, stir fry/baked pot or similar or dinner. I’m now bordering a normal weight, and have slowed down to 2 or 3 pounds loss a month, but I feel like I’m eating “normally” again so all good. Picked up the exercise and am fitting easily into my clothes