H spending a whole day ( the only day he has ) mowing the lawn

[yawnlawn]

Is it necessary? Does it take the whole day?

He spends the whole day out there. I occasionally go out with the kids, but as they're young, they get in the way and it becomes stressful too. He's probably spent about an hour with us today.

He always finds something else to do.

We have a big garden with several lawn areas. With a decent petrol mower it takes about 45 mins. Unless the OP lives at Downton Abbey all day is ridiculous.

What happens if you secretly take a half day off next week just before his free day and mow the lawn for him? I wouldn't be surprised if he either gets angry over something or starts doing something else to avoid you and the kids.

When you say “all day” can you literally see him pushing the mower/strimmer around for hours or is he just outside all day and when you ask him wtf he’s been up to he says cutting the grass?

This is what I'd do but I'd mow the lawn myself (I do, and ours doesn't take more than an hour, and it's a fairly big garden) if he still finds a way to avoid the family then you need a serious chat as to why he does it

Ge this ride on mower and he can take at least one child with him. My dc lived riding with grandad on the mower

We only recently got a lawn mower. I've not used it yet.

We used to have a Gardner who did it every two weeks and it was fine. He's off sick at the moment, so H has really taken to it all.

He's out there mowing and using the blower. He's not mowing the whole day, but manages to spend the whole day out there doing stuff. We don't have any plants. We just have a lawn for now. It's patchy so he puts stuff on it and waters it etc. I guess he's trying to make it nice and he says he really enjoys it. I think it's nice he has found something he likes to do. But he's jusy leaving me to look after the kids all day on my own. And that's had too. I'm really tired. He's come in at 7 pm and kids were playing up and he just can't handle it and I have to handle it every day before and after I work a stressful job and also all weekend. Love my kids, buy it would be great to have some support and a bit of a break sometimes.

So once he's finished with lawn mower go out with the kids. He can potter doing whatever and the kida can play outside.

Just cause he was outside doesn't mean yoi can't be. And if the kids get in his way 🤷🏼‍♀️

So what did he say when you told him you’d looked after the kids all day on your own?

So now he's come in, find an important chore you need to do (as you haven't had a chance all day) and he can do bedtime.

Have you told him how you feel? If so what has he said.

Well this isn’t about the lawn at all Is it…

we have a ridiculous one and it takes us about three hours, at least twice a week - because it’s a show garden that has visitors each year.

it’s clear he’s avoiding parenting (or you?)
man’s it’s clear you need to kick the kids out the door and tell them to play outside while you have some time.

No more than an hour.

We have quite a big lawn. I have just mowed it and actually gone over it twice to suck up bits of cut grass that have sprayed out. It's taken me just over an hour?? Can't see how it takes all day. Is that literally just cutting grass or is it weeding etc too?

Camilla, is that you?

I would so do this 😂.

And then tell him on Saturday that isn't it great you've done it, as now he doesn't have to worry about it and can spend the whole day playing with the children.

Get a robot lawn mower. Then he'll have no excuse.

I've seen all the fathers of young kids, on my street, do this for 20 years. It's so obvious they are avoiding the children.

My grass areas are the same size and I can mow, trim and sweep up in less than half an hour. And I'm 20 years older than most of these men.

Clearly this isnt about gardening, he doesnt want to spend time with you & the kids...or maybe just he kids

Pay a teenager to do it on Friday afternoons before he gets home from work. He'll have no excuse to absolve himself from family life ... or he'll look for another way to do so which should confirm his behaviour to you. Then you'll have a decision to make about your relationship...

😂

🤣🤣🤣

Have you actually spoken to him? Obviously he’s not mowing the lawn all day, my husband can cut about 90 acres of silage on a Saturday and still be home for a bbq late afternoon.

why don’t you get involved with the gardening, my 3&5 year olds love planting and weeding and have their own pots- it’s a good way to get them interested.

I thought I was the only one with this problem. Every time the lawn needs mowing it turns into this huge drawn out saga taking most of the day, and I end up in sole charge of a two year old. Exhausting and infuriating. So no advice sorry OP but solidarity

Well I'm just so tired this week. I'm in a really bad mood now and was also last night. My kids have been sick this week. He keeps having a go at me for being in a bad mood. I said I am sick and tired of always being the one to watch the kids on my own and him always coming up with all sorts of important jobs he needs to do. Now it's the lawn. Next week it will be the cars and garage need sorting. I'm so tired this week and in a mood. He says these are important things that need to be done and he needs to do them. And that I'm always on his back and he can't do anything in peace.

No doubt he'll want sex later and then throw a strop if he doesn't get any ( he won't get any ) I want to be ALONE when my kids go to sleep and I just want to CHILL. I don't want to talk to anyone. Let alone him. Who actively avoids us.

🤣🤣🤣🤣👍👍👍