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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour and big lorry

120 replies

Senzi · 02/06/2023 09:38

Neighbour A lives a few doors down from neighbour B. A runs a business from home and has a weekly delivery where a large lorry enters the street to deliver stock.

B doesn’t like the lorry as she likes her kids to play out in nice weather and worries a lorry is imposing some danger towards her children. B reports A to the local council. Council investigate and finds nothing unreasonable or untoward.

A has since found alternative premises to receive deliveries but has outed B on the neighbourhood WhatsApp group. A has said B is nothing but spiteful and deceitful as could have quite easily had a chat with A and come to an agreement about any concerns or issues rather than reporting A anonymously to the council. B maintains they have done nothing wrong as she just wants her children to feel safe outside their own home.

who is being unreasonable A or B?

OP posts:
GasPanic · 02/06/2023 12:47

Fraaahnces · 02/06/2023 12:23

How the fuck does she cope on garbage day?

The council are probably more interested in how A copes on garbage day.

IamnotSethRogan · 02/06/2023 12:48

I don't see how the lorry is any different from a super market delivery. Every one should have just had a private conversation about their concerns as opposed to reporting and outing people on WhatsApp chats

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 02/06/2023 12:49

Not sure how the vote works but B could have handled it better and as PP have pointed out, for a small window a week it's so trivial.

caringcarer · 02/06/2023 12:55

B

Kugela · 02/06/2023 12:55

B was utterly ridiculous to report a weekly lorry delivery to the council.

A was silly to discuss it on a WhatsApp group, but it’s understandable why she did it.

itsgettingweird · 02/06/2023 13:15

If Bs children are old enough to be playing out in the street unsupervised then surely this is only an issue in the school holidays?

Unless the delivery is usually a weekend when I'd suggest to A that they arrange the delivery for school time and have it at the alternative premises school holidays only. But that's to keep the peace as B doesn't get to dictate what traffic uses a public road!

Bbqshowdownusa · 02/06/2023 13:22

B needs to get a life.

pictoosh · 02/06/2023 13:23

B is a self-important arse.

Readyplayerthr33 · 02/06/2023 13:24

@Senzi
Are you coming back? Are you B?

pictoosh · 02/06/2023 13:24

And A has no obligation to protect her.

autienotnaughtym · 02/06/2023 13:25

B is the worse of the two as they can't control traffic and could have spoke to A directly.

A shouldn't have brought the group into it.

My guess is you are B

Curseofthenation · 02/06/2023 13:36

B is unreasonable and deserved the public shaming. They could at least have posted a private note through the door first. If I were B, I would apologise on the WhatsApp group to A and buy some flowers or chocolates as a way of apology.

TenoringBehind · 02/06/2023 13:49

Both are are unreasonable and have behaved badly.

OhmygodDont · 02/06/2023 14:04

B was and is being a dick, A gave them a taste of the consequences of being a dick.

If B wanted to be in the right they would have spoken to A first or at least had the balls to put their name to the complaint in the first place.

A lorry once a week in a road is hardly going to cause any issues, depending on what the business is they might not even have vans coming on other days either. If it’s bulk raw materials they could be turned into tiny items the neighbour posts at the post office. Even if not, most streets have the Amazon/dpd/Hermes etc vans down their streets daily anyway.

Now an artic everyday to a residential house could be an issue but once a week is pathetic to complain about.

AgentProvocateur · 02/06/2023 14:09

I’m guessing you’re Neighbour B, @Senzi 😂

RoseyLentil · 02/06/2023 14:13

Hilarious 😂
What about the refuse collection lorry? The recycling lorry? Garden waste lorry? They are HGVs.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 02/06/2023 14:14

Neighbour B was very unreasonable from how you have written it.

Forgetmenott · 02/06/2023 14:37

Obviously B is at fault. You can’t control who uses a public road or what deliveries they receive. Once a week is very reasonable! B could have approached A to discuss changing the time of delivery if it was an issue.

taxguru · 02/06/2023 14:46

Thinkwhat · 02/06/2023 09:58

Many domestic properties have covenants on them preventing you from running a business from them. The neighbour might be breaking the covenant, or need to apply for a change of use depending on the nature of the business. I think neighbour B is probably correct, but maybe reported it to the wrong department.

Neither have handled the situation well-weekly lorry deliveries to a residential street are to be fair a bit of a nuisance, and the other should’ve had a quiet word first

I agree with this. It's a matter of what level of nuisance/disruption is acceptable when running a business from domestic premises. Different councils have different views on that, and as you say, some homes are subject to restrictive covenants in their deeds.

The general/common criteria is that you're ok if you're not having customers, suppliers or deliveries to your home, i.e. purely an administrative/organisational base is fine. If you are having "traffic" to your home, then the nature, frequency, etc will determine whether it's enough of a nuisance for the council to take action or for the restrictive covenant to be triggered.

I suppose the question is how big is the lorry? If it's similar in size to other domestic delivery lorries, i.e. from Currys, Argos, Amazon, etc., then it's hardly a nuisance and complaining seems over the top (but then again, how much is it delivering - if it's just a few minutes, no problem, but if it's there, blocking the road, for an hour whilst it unloads the entire van full, then there are grounds for complaint! Likewise if it's a ruddy huge articulated lorry, then again, pretty unreasonable for a housing estate as most other homes won't get that kind of delivery on a regular basis and it would be a nuisance.

Coolblur · 02/06/2023 15:04

People are very reluctant to discuss issues with their neighbours, but quite happy to complain to the council, especially as the council don't disclose who raised the complaint. Ironically our local council website advises speaking to your neighbours in the first instance, but no one ever does. Same goes for anonymous moaning posts in local Facebook groups. Just speak to people if you're worried!

In answer to your question, B is unreasonable, but I probably wouldn't have posted online as A did, rise above it and all that

Original poster
Senzi · 02/06/2023 15:16

Is a neighbour’s WhatsApp group the same as social media? I didn’t think it was

OP posts:
Orchidflower1 · 02/06/2023 15:46

So @Senzi are you A or B😀

Mylifeislikeaboatrace · 02/06/2023 15:49

I don't think we will find out, I'd be too embarrassed to admit to being one or the other after these responses tbh.

KarmaStar · 02/06/2023 16:04

B.

EmpressMoo · 02/06/2023 16:04

A is more in the wrong.

It might have been better for B to speak to A first for neighbourly relations but that rather depends on whether A is a reasonable person... Maybe not, if A is the kind of person to slag people off on social media. Perhaps B felt it was a more neutral way to deal with it if this is how A has reacted to B complaining.

If it is permitted by the covenants, local laws and regulations to run a business that has regular large deliveries, B can do nothing about it. I don't see why she shouldn't speak to the council about it to see if it is permitted if she doesn't like it though. It doesn't harm A if she is doing nothing wrong, only if she is breaking the law/regulations. There is no real harm done by B to A in reporting it to the council if A is doing nothing wrong.

Telling everyone about it on social media is far worse, it's bullying.

How does A know that B reported her if the report was "anonymous"? Or is A just saying that to make B seem underhand?