To ask how the hell you sleep with a newborn??

[PizzaPlease7]

DC3..you would think I had this, but no. DC1 and 2 slept like, well..babies! DC3 however is just over a week old and didn’t receive the memo about sleeping at night and waking up every couple of hours for a feed. He is awake all night long. I try and settle him and as soon as I put him down he’s fussing, trying to wriggle out of his swaddle and then wide awake. He was awake until 3am last night and then up every 40 mins or so until I gave up at 8am. I have had zero sleep pretty much and I’m wondering how people do this?! Is this normal? Was I lucky with 1&2?!

During the day he sleeps like an angel, practically all day and lets me put him down once he’s asleep and he will stay asleep. Any advice welcome I am shattered and not sure if my baby is broken!!!

You were lucky with 1&2.
It won't last forever. Do you have help? Can DH/DP mind the children for a few hours during the day so you can get some sleep?

You were lucky with 1&2. This is totally normal. Do some research on the 4th trimester. It's normal for them to want to be close to you all night for comfort.

Totally normal. Make sure you take him outside during the day to start getting his day/nights sorted but yeah, the first few weeks are just a bit of a blur and time has no meaning with most babies.

Totally normal. My ds1 was like this, awake all night slept all day. Takes time for them to settle into sleeping at night took dd1 8 weeks.

I had a marvellous midwife who showed me how to breastfeed whilst lying down, so I could get some sleep whilst feeding. Did this for my three and that's how I got my sleep. But I fully understand no midwives today are likely to share this advice with you. However, it was a lifesaver with no3.

Currently have a 4 month old, and she slept her in snuzpod next to the bed from day 1, with me (DH slept on sofa and we took turns) she slept like an angel for first week and then just would not sleep deeply enough to be asleep for long periods. Then up until about a month ago my DH has sleep in the bed next to the snuzpod and I sleep on the sofa. I CAN NOT sleep in the same room as her cause she makes noises and shuffles but my
DH sleeps through it all and wakes when she actually wants feeding which now , is very rarely . She generally sleeps through until 4ish and then has some milk and sleeps again until 7.

I have tried this with her in the night, nope she doesn’t do this with me. He has a special method or trained her lol 😂

It really is totally normal. Keep your house nice and bright during the day and make noise even when the baby is sleeping. At nighttime, that's when you want to keep the house dark and quieter.

Are you breastfeeding? Could be she's not getting enough milk maybe?

"During the day he sleeps like an angel,"

You want advice you say...
Well then don't let your baby sleep so much during the day ?

I used to wake my kids when they slept too long .People thought I was mad
Until both my kids slept from 7pm to 7am without any wakings from 7 weeks old and then everyone was jealous and bitchy 😂
If you already have 2 kids.. this might be a life saver for you

But it is not for everyone 🤐

I co slept, it was the only way I got sleep. I know that's not for everyone though. Agree with PP, though maybe she's not getting enough milk. I always found when mine were full, they were very settled. Baby massage before bed also helped. But some babies are just like that honestly. It won't last forever

Thank you for all your responses and reassurance that this is hopefully just a phase!

@SparklyBlackKitten that’s pretty impressive but I’m not sure it’s safe or recommended to not feed a 7 week old baby for 12 hours overnight! Unless you dream fed? Will try and keep him awake a bit more in the day time though..

I think he’s pretty satisfied feeding wise, I can hear him gulping away and he unlatches himself most of the time. When he gets fussy I offer him the breast again and he normally doesn’t want it. Just wants to be held/awake?! I’m thinking he might not like his swaddle (he really fights it!) will try no swaddle tonight and see how he gets on.

Co-sleep so you can bf laying down.

Try to keep him a bit more awake in the day.

Take him outside a lot in the daytime so the sunlight can start getting his sleep rhythms sorted.

Sleep during the day when he is asleep so you can cope with the lack of sleep at night.

FFS. Why is there always one who jumps to this when there is no suggestion of feeding issues.

OP baby is only a week old, it’s normal for them to sleep more during the day.
as others said, it’ll switch over a few weeks.

Your post is scaring me 😂i'm expecting number 2 in the next couple of weeks and my first was really good at sleeping at night vs day, I'm really hoping the next one will get the memo!

Agree with taking baby out during the day. Are you breastfeeding? Apparently the hormones in breast milk change depending on time of day and help babies differentiate between night and day.

Very normal. My dc didn't sleep through until 2yo. It was rough going! Good luck. Hopefully improves for you.

Induce circadian rhythm with curtains closed, lights dimmed at 7pm every night...strict routine. Baby will adapt eventually.

Ours (we have 3) were all born thinking daytime was for naps and nighttime was for being awake, which I think is pretty normal as before they are born they're rocked to sleep by you moving around during the daytime, and then they wake up when you're lying still overnight.

It took 2 of them about 2 weeks to go from that to a more usual baby pattern of sleeping bigger chunks at night in between feeds, and shorter naps in the day. The other one just never slept for more than 20-40 minutes at a stretch. For a year. I hope you don't have one of those.

My second didn’t sleep longer than 15 minutes, day OR night. She didn’t crack a smile for over 2 years either. Strangers walked up to me and asked why she was always awake and always so grumpy. Let’s just say it was hell and leave it at that. She’s now a troublesome teen, give me strength.

Nothing but sympathy from here, Op.

@SparklyBlackKitten were your children breastfed?

I think you should have hope, you said DS sleeps well through the day - so it sounds like he just needs to work out day and night, and then you'll be ok. I agree with the advice of PP, lots of noise and sunlight in the day, quiet and dark in the day. Also lots of playing and talking and eye contact in the day, and as little as possible at night. Good luck!

DS was like this for a couple of months, literally couldn’t put him down night or day (he had reflux in the end and once medicated he was much better)
DH and I took turns to hold him through the night basically so we both got a chunk each of sleep. And then did one night each on a weekend.

Sounds like a normal baby and you were VERY lucky with DC1 and 2!

I had twins for baby 2 and I was so sleep deprived for the first 18 months due to one of them never wanting to sleep! I remember standing at the side of my son's football game crying as I was so exhausted and could hardly stand up!

Distinguish between night and day eg. light, noise, talking to baby v dark, quiet & no interaction.

Have to say co-sleeping was the way we got through and actually found it all easier with 2&3 once I did this. They were also bf which made it much easier for co-sleeping and sleeping generally as there was no faffing in the night just feed and nappy change only if soiled or very wet. Youngest is 8 now though and I've no idea if this fits with current guidelines, although I'd stopped paying attention to them by no 3 anyway 😬.

Ds was like this, with colic aswell 😫he slowly slowly started sleeping longer and longer stretches and by 3 months was only waking once or twice a night. It's painful but it will end, frankly I'm amazed you've had two sleepers! Lucky you!