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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Elderly neighbour v house renovation

195 replies

shazwee · 30/05/2023 15:21

I've inherited a house which had tons of damage, needed new roof, re wire, concrete base new ceilings etc..basically almost has to rebuild, semi detached dormer bungalow. House has been empty for many years. Some things have been done since March, new roof etc..elderly single lady next door is not coping well with the noise of the workmen. It's been difficult as I don't have a massive pot of money to put it right so relying on family and friends etc trying to keep noise to minimum at weekends ( although this is really only the time hubby and I can spare to do bits) I have sent flowers to neighbour, kept her informed etc..gave her some doors etc she wanted , basically I have tried to be as accommodating as possible. Yesterday the plasterer was in and she came round complaining its was a holiday and didn't want to noise ( she is round every time a trade is there complaining about noise) I dont know what else I can do. There is possibility months more of noise to come, plumbers, patio to be laid, new kitchen the list is endless...Yesterday she asked us to tell her everytime noise is going to be made...impossible for us as we're not always there and cannot ask workmen to do so...what can I do, I don't want to fall out but I can't see a way forward..she has had silence from the house for years. I didn't think a plasterer would make any noise 🤔 please help MN friends x

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
CannotDoThisAnymore · 30/05/2023 16:35

Could you take her around your house so she can see the extent of what needs to be done still. Maybe if you can become friendly with her she might be a little more forgiving with the noise. Ask her if the workmen are too loud (voices) or music etc vs drilling/banging

Almahart · 30/05/2023 16:36

Ageism here is off the scale. Of course you can't be doing building work 7 days a week, it's fucking horrible as a neighbour. You are going to have to suck it up and give it a rest at the weekends.

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:36

oh my goodness
what do people not understand about 'there are laws about when you can do work'

don't patronise her with headphones, offering to cut the grass etc

do the work within the legal hours and if you can't afford to, then sell the property

it's straightforward

don't be the sort of shitty neighbour that people complain about on here

saltinesandcoffeecups · 30/05/2023 16:36

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:32

They are a legal requirement. If the OP can't afford to do the house up then she should consider selling it as it is. A big job like this needs professionals.

Show quote history

That a stupid suggestion. The option, if not working in those hours, is to drag the project out for years depending on the work needed.

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:37

NowItsLikeSnowAtTheBeach · 30/05/2023 16:32

Offer to direct her to the purchasing pages of some white noise headphones while the work is going on, but make it clear that the work needs to go on and that isn't negotiable.

the timing will be very much negotiable if she gets a noise abatement order.

Original poster
shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:37

Thanks for all the replies, the noise started end of March with the roof, it's not been going on every day . No work is ever going beyond 6pm. We allowed plasterer to come bank hols to try and speed the job up in hind sight maybe we should have not. The lady is lovely she is 86, no family near by, does not drive or go out. I do really feel for her, as I have been on ther other end...but without us doing bits on the weekend both myself and husband work full time we will never get it moving...funds are a massive issue. It might come to a point where we have to stop for a while, earn more money for the next job.. she even complained to my husband when he was using a drill at 3pm on a Friday to take down some rotten hanging baskets in the garden. Most trades apart.from roofers and scaffold guys are lone workers so no shouting etc...I invited her in yesterday to show her downstairs and she was upset as she thought it would be nearly finished...told her next sat will be noisy as windows and doors are being fitted...I cant give her much advance warning as I say its been mainly friends helping in btw their full.time work. It's just an awful situation that could potentially go on for months and months..even years ! 😢

OP posts:
Crochetpenguin · 30/05/2023 16:37

Having just had a full rewire, boarding of ceilings (who ever thought polystyrene tiles were a good idea!) and then it all replastered I know how noisy plasterers can be. Using the mixer thing upstairs in particular. We were in a similar situation with the elderly lady next door who constantly complained. We did try to warn in advance which trade would be in on which day and she would arrange for her son to take her out. Also lots of flowers, apologies.

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:38

saltinesandcoffeecups · 30/05/2023 16:36

That a stupid suggestion. The option, if not working in those hours, is to drag the project out for years depending on the work needed.

Show quote history

the option is to sell the house to someone who can afford to do it up
or borrow money
or do it over years in the hours where it is legally allowed

the option isn't to decide that you're a special flower and the rules that govern how we live peacefully with our neighbours don't apply to you............

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:38

shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:37

Thanks for all the replies, the noise started end of March with the roof, it's not been going on every day . No work is ever going beyond 6pm. We allowed plasterer to come bank hols to try and speed the job up in hind sight maybe we should have not. The lady is lovely she is 86, no family near by, does not drive or go out. I do really feel for her, as I have been on ther other end...but without us doing bits on the weekend both myself and husband work full time we will never get it moving...funds are a massive issue. It might come to a point where we have to stop for a while, earn more money for the next job.. she even complained to my husband when he was using a drill at 3pm on a Friday to take down some rotten hanging baskets in the garden. Most trades apart.from roofers and scaffold guys are lone workers so no shouting etc...I invited her in yesterday to show her downstairs and she was upset as she thought it would be nearly finished...told her next sat will be noisy as windows and doors are being fitted...I cant give her much advance warning as I say its been mainly friends helping in btw their full.time work. It's just an awful situation that could potentially go on for months and months..even years ! 😢

Can you fit windows and doors between 8am and 1pm? assuming your council has the same hours as most, if not, then you shouldn't be doing it on a Saturday.

FlounderingFruitcake · 30/05/2023 16:39

You have to stick the law and not do noisy works outside of these time. Her age or your lack of funds are not an excuse. And no plastering is not quiet if it’s plaster board going up or the mixing of plaster.

NumberTheory · 30/05/2023 16:40

YABU. You need to stop trying to make money by doing up the house at unlawful times. If you can't do it during the acceptable windows, sell it.

NowZeusHasLainWithLeda · 30/05/2023 16:40

shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:37

Thanks for all the replies, the noise started end of March with the roof, it's not been going on every day . No work is ever going beyond 6pm. We allowed plasterer to come bank hols to try and speed the job up in hind sight maybe we should have not. The lady is lovely she is 86, no family near by, does not drive or go out. I do really feel for her, as I have been on ther other end...but without us doing bits on the weekend both myself and husband work full time we will never get it moving...funds are a massive issue. It might come to a point where we have to stop for a while, earn more money for the next job.. she even complained to my husband when he was using a drill at 3pm on a Friday to take down some rotten hanging baskets in the garden. Most trades apart.from roofers and scaffold guys are lone workers so no shouting etc...I invited her in yesterday to show her downstairs and she was upset as she thought it would be nearly finished...told her next sat will be noisy as windows and doors are being fitted...I cant give her much advance warning as I say its been mainly friends helping in btw their full.time work. It's just an awful situation that could potentially go on for months and months..even years ! 😢

None of which is your neighbour's fault.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 30/05/2023 16:41

mycoffeecup · 30/05/2023 16:38

the option is to sell the house to someone who can afford to do it up
or borrow money
or do it over years in the hours where it is legally allowed

the option isn't to decide that you're a special flower and the rules that govern how we live peacefully with our neighbours don't apply to you............

Show quote history

‘or do it over years in the hours where it is legally allowed’

Isn’t that what I’ve been saying? Perhaps you should read my posts before arguing with me. 😉

NowZeusHasLainWithLeda · 30/05/2023 16:42

Whether it's your mates or whoever, you really really need to check your local council laws, because it sounds like you're breaking almost every single one of the ones other posters have helpfully pointed out.

pussycatinfluffyslippers · 30/05/2023 16:47

She's just going to have to accept that there will be some noise while the repairs and renovations continue.
You can't help it.
If you sold the property in its current state, the buyer would have to make the same (possibly more) noise.

milveycrohn · 30/05/2023 16:49

My DS is currently having work done to his house, and I am not sure what document it is (planning permission, or party wall agreement?), it states that work can only be carried out between the hours of 8 am to 6 pm, and Saturday morning. Not sundays and not bank holidays.
Obviously for those doing work themselves, who only really have the evenings, then this can be difficult. However, I consider this to be good guidelines to work to, and only do the rather quiet work outside those hours.

Heronwatcher · 30/05/2023 16:49

shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:37

Thanks for all the replies, the noise started end of March with the roof, it's not been going on every day . No work is ever going beyond 6pm. We allowed plasterer to come bank hols to try and speed the job up in hind sight maybe we should have not. The lady is lovely she is 86, no family near by, does not drive or go out. I do really feel for her, as I have been on ther other end...but without us doing bits on the weekend both myself and husband work full time we will never get it moving...funds are a massive issue. It might come to a point where we have to stop for a while, earn more money for the next job.. she even complained to my husband when he was using a drill at 3pm on a Friday to take down some rotten hanging baskets in the garden. Most trades apart.from roofers and scaffold guys are lone workers so no shouting etc...I invited her in yesterday to show her downstairs and she was upset as she thought it would be nearly finished...told her next sat will be noisy as windows and doors are being fitted...I cant give her much advance warning as I say its been mainly friends helping in btw their full.time work. It's just an awful situation that could potentially go on for months and months..even years ! 😢

You sound really blasé about this! The poor woman.

You cannot let this go on “for years”. That would be completely selfish.
Get the basics done, move in, save up some money over 6-12 months and then get the job done properly.
And why did your husband need a drill to TAKE DOWN a rotten hanging basket? Has he never heard of a screwdriver? Which doesn’t make a noise…

Mala1992 · 30/05/2023 16:49

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 30/05/2023 15:42

It's an 'elderly' neighbour. I very much doubt Bank Holidays, or weekends for that matter, are of any significance to them - unless they've got family round!

You are being very ageist here.

Just what I thought.

The work does need doing obviously, but this discounting of elderly neighbour having a right to be protected by the law on these matters is precisely what makes them vulnerable as a group - just like any group that doesn’t have a voice - or at least not one that people think needs respecting

pussycatinfluffyslippers · 30/05/2023 16:53

The thing is, if you don't do stuff at weekends or in an evening, it will take even longer to finish.

And if she's moaning about a drill in the garden on a friday afternoon 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:55

OMG ...the plasterer was there for 3 hours on bank hols yes I admit this was wrong in hind sight....at no other time has any noisy works been carried out outside of 8 to 6pm or after 1pm on a sat...we are not stupid or self entitled pricks as someone mentioned...the point is as soon as anyone turns up she is round even before they have got their tools out of the van complaining about the noise !

OP posts:
pussycatinfluffyslippers · 30/05/2023 16:55

And why did your husband need a drill to TAKE DOWN a rotten hanging basket? Has he never heard of a screwdriver? Which doesn’t make a noise…
Have you ever tried to remove a rusty screw from an equally rust hanging basket bracket? You can try silently swearing and a screwdriver, but I doubt it would work - it didn't for me.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 30/05/2023 16:55

Heronwatcher · 30/05/2023 16:49

You sound really blasé about this! The poor woman.

You cannot let this go on “for years”. That would be completely selfish.
Get the basics done, move in, save up some money over 6-12 months and then get the job done properly.
And why did your husband need a drill to TAKE DOWN a rotten hanging basket? Has he never heard of a screwdriver? Which doesn’t make a noise…

Show quote history

And why did your husband need a drill to TAKE DOWN a rotten hanging basket?

Well clearly he was within his rights to do so at 3pm on a Friday as others have helpfully posted.

Look if the house in this bad of repair the the neighbor hasn’t been plagued by building noise for years on end. Yes the OP should not be an asshole about it but the neighbor needs to gain some perspective.

The OP may not have a choice to let this go on for years. She has every right to do work on her house (within the law). The neighbor will just have to live with it. If most of the work has been happening on the weekends, then I’m guessing that the noise during the week is minimal to non existent.

Original poster
shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:56

This exactly...

OP posts:
bussteward · 30/05/2023 16:56

It's just an awful situation that could potentially go on for months and months..even years
Bloody hell, show some agency: this is on you. You’re not a passenger with zero control. You’re choosing to do this!

Either stop and save up to do it within reasonable hours by pros, or sell up. You’re out of your depth.

pussycatinfluffyslippers · 30/05/2023 16:58

shazwee · 30/05/2023 16:55

OMG ...the plasterer was there for 3 hours on bank hols yes I admit this was wrong in hind sight....at no other time has any noisy works been carried out outside of 8 to 6pm or after 1pm on a sat...we are not stupid or self entitled pricks as someone mentioned...the point is as soon as anyone turns up she is round even before they have got their tools out of the van complaining about the noise !

Then except yesterday, I don't see what more you could have done.
Just forewarn anyone doing any work there if you're not there to supervise, and stick to the "normal working hrs".