To think reborn dolls are disturbing?

[Hazel2323]

I've just ended up down a rabbit hole on Facebook of people into reborn dolls. What the hell. Ive heard of them before but never knew just how many people are into them and the extent the obsession goes to. Dressing them, doing newborn photo shoots. They are the creepiest thing I've seen in a long time and I just can't understand why anyone would have one. Some say it's a hobby. Some have it after baby loss. Either way it's bizarre and not healthy.
I also don't like that these people are buying baby clothes to dress a doll in and toys/blankets/cots/bottles etc that real families could actually use. It seems terribly wasteful.

As others have said similar if it helps someone and they get comfort from it that all that matters. Just because we don’t necessarily understand it doesn’t make it creepy or weird.

It's much more disturbing, creepy and weird that there are people who actually abuse and murder their own actual, real babies...

People holding dolls as a form of comfort is incredibly harmless

@HowDoYouDoWhatYouDoToMeIWishIKnew

Some people (the OP) are lucky to live in blissful ignorance.
It would be nice though if, when they are educated about what others are going through, they are gracious enough to admit their ignorance wouldn't it?

Well I like them. I haven't lost a baby and I dont have one myself but they are quite popular with little girls and we have two in the family.
They are certainly marmite tho, some of the family are freaked out by them and others, like me are happy to sit and hold them.
And it's much cheaper to buy them clothes, believe it or not real baby clothes are cheaper than all that Baby Alive stuff.

Can't see it's any different to any other pretend toy personally.

@TheoTheopolis23 I worked on a dementia ward for a while, they didn’t really have dolls but a few had those toy cuddly dogs that move like they can breathe, I think they were called pet alive or something like that. But the difference in mood when they had one on their lap. They genuinely thought it was their pet and would sit really happy with them when they might have been lashing out hitting minutes before in an awful temper. I guess those dolls maybe do similar? I’m not really sure but the little toy dogs were very obviously fake to us but to the patients they were absolutely real so it must be the same! I suppose the feel of the doll maybe brings them back to happier times and relaxes them.

But how do you know how you'd feel if you lost a baby if you haven't lost one? You don't know what might help you grieve. And, these dolls can help psychologically. Losing a husband vs losing a child you've carried for x amount of months and planned and longed for is different (not minimising anyone's grief regarding losing a partner or parent or anything). Everyone grieves differently and different things help different people.

The clothes would be available if the people bought them or not. People may also buy second hand sometimes.

I personally like these dolls but I've always liked dolls if all sorts (not sex dolls though lol).

Aww. I think they're extremely cute. I wouldn't buy one but I can see the appeal in dressing and cuddling one. Every book its reader and all.

I’m not really sure but the little toy dogs were very obviously fake to us but to the patients they were absolutely real so it must be the same!

Thanks for explaining.

Why is a life like newborn doll any different to a normal doll? Things always evolve and get better so one could argue these are just more advanced dolls.

The issues I have with them is that some of these dolls are horrific, they look - I can’t even begin to say it, let’s just say they don’t have the (mainly) pleasant skin tone of a small living baby. I am on one of the FB groups, I don’t have a ‘reborn’ but did fancy one. I’ve been well and truly put off.

I mean it's not vastly different to children who have teddy bears or soft toys. My dd is 12, she's had the same favourite teddy since she was a baby.

Indeed.

I can't quite get over the arrogance of op thinking she can grieve 'better' than those of us who have actually been through it.

I very much doubt op will ever admit ignorance, the type of person who would start this thread isn't the type of person who would ever say they were wrong.

They aren't safe for children though. Adults only.

I've seen quite a lot on TikTok. There was this young woman with a much older Husband and they had two.

Exactly what I wanted to say but wasn't sure how to say it without offending anyone. There is a biological want after losing your baby that no amount of counselling can stop. I can't explain the emptiness that I will forever feel in my arms and if someone needs a reborn doll then I certainly wouldn't deny them.

Not my thing at all, I don't find them remotely appealing. Having said that, I still enjoy the odd cuddle with Norman Monkey, he's lovely! Is fluffy Norm really so different to one of these dolls? Live and let live, as long as nobody is being hurt, where's the harm?

BTW, if you have children yourself, you've absolutely no business banging on about the ecological implications of these dolls.

My mum had one of these when she had dementia and loved him. She thought it was her baby son, my elder brother, and she spent hours cuddling and chatting to him. He bought her much joy in the last year of her life. She had lost all her short term memory and I do feel she thought he was real and just asleep. I find the OPs comments quite upsetting, lacking empathy and judgemental. Just because people find joy or comfort in things the OP thinks are weird doesn’t mean they have Mental Health issues.

I also think it diminishes those who do have mental health issues and find them helpful.

Since you have never lost a baby, it’s intolerable that you feel qualified to comment on that tbh.

and your comments about waste are ridiculous. People spend money on all kinds of things.

Something else has just occurred to me - some people really do seem to find comfort in these dolls. I expect these people might have turned to the NHS or Social Services otherwise (or not needed their help any longer). It would be fair to say (IMO) that they have the potential to lessen the strain on these services. Even if it's only a tiny bit. That's definitely not something to be slated.

I find the extent you give a shit about people owning dolls, weirder than said dolls 🤷🏼‍♀️.

I wonder how much of OP's prejudice is against the dolls and how much is against people struggling with their mental health, and in her eyes "not getting proper help".

Like others on this thread, I’ve have had to endure the agony of going home without my babies. I don’t have a reborn doll but I understand why they might provide a tiny bit of comfort.

The mere existence of these dolls doesn’t affect you one bit. Be thankful that you don’t know what it feels like to suffer the loss of a child rather than merrily passing judgement on people who have been through unimaginable (to you) pain

For people with dementia, (I'm mainly talking about Alzheimer's but it can happen in other types too) short term memory is one of the first things to go.

So if a person has progressed to the stage where they are looking for their baby (who is now grown), they won't really be retaining events enough to process that the baby is always sleeping. And yes, the same conversation can happen repeatedly, almost on a loop.

But ideally the process of making the cup of tea will re-focus the person's attention for a few minutes and then you can move on to a new activity when they have finished the tea.

I don't know this will feel any less creepy, but there are also sleeping dogs and cats for people with dementia. They make all different breeds and their chests rise and fall as they breathe. 😁

I find them a bit scary especially the very realistic ones. A bit too uncanny valley for me but I know they can help some people. The only thing I truly take issue with is using real formula for them.