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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband sulking at the coronation

56 replies

NapoliTutti · 06/05/2023 14:14

so i’m not a huge royalist but I’m really into history and this is a historic day. I said to my husband a couple of weeks ago, I know you’re not into it so would you mind watching/occupying the kids while I watch it.
He’s got up this morning and said I’ve changed my mind I’m going to help my brother today, all day. I basically told him no chance, help him any other day but I want a few hours to watch the coronation uninterrupted. Cue him stropping around the house, snapping at me and the kids, not going out with them til 1pm and moaning its a waste of everyones time.
I very rarely ask him to look after the kids for a few hours, whereas he springs that stuff on me most weekends without notice. Its REALLY annoyed me. He’s usually a good if grumpy at times partner and dad. So am I bring unreasonable or is he acting like a total bloody arse?!

OP posts:
grinner83 · 06/05/2023 14:18

He's acting like a total arse. I have a few friends who have partners that do what they like on the weekend and I don't know how they put up with it. Obviously we are all entitled to our own interests and time/space to ourselves etc, but we also need to be respectful of the other people in the house!

Your partner is behaving like a petulant child. I'd tell him later how it's made you feel. Hopefully he'll take it on board.

Sissynova · 06/05/2023 14:21

Husband sulking at the coronation

He’s not sulking at the coronation, he’s sulking at having to be a parent to his own children. Hardly the marker of a “good” dad.

NightIsYoungSoAreWe · 06/05/2023 14:22

I actually think this is controlling and abusive.
Leading you on with the plan then changing at the last minute so you are the one who suffers and cant do what you want just so he can do what he wants, he values his own wants over yours.
Then sulks and acts like a dick when you rightfully put your foot down which is to pressure you into giving into him.
And all of this in front of children.

DustyLee123 · 06/05/2023 14:23

He’s sulking because he doesn’t want to parent his children while you watch TV. He’s a knob.

ilovesooty · 06/05/2023 14:24

He's being asked to parent - hardly unreasonable.

gamerchick · 06/05/2023 14:25

He's sulking at being asked to be a dad OP. He's sulking because you want something for yourself .
You've got bigger problems than the coronation tbh.

I'd be calling him an arsehole and asking if he still wants to be a part of the family since he doesn't seem to want to be.

Ponoka7 · 06/05/2023 14:25

I wish women would stop accepting the grumpiness. He's snapping at the kids, explain what makes a good dad in your mind. I'd be telling him straight later on.

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 06/05/2023 14:29

NightIsYoungSoAreWe · 06/05/2023 14:22

I actually think this is controlling and abusive.
Leading you on with the plan then changing at the last minute so you are the one who suffers and cant do what you want just so he can do what he wants, he values his own wants over yours.
Then sulks and acts like a dick when you rightfully put your foot down which is to pressure you into giving into him.
And all of this in front of children.

This

5128gap · 06/05/2023 14:32

Ponoka7 · 06/05/2023 14:25

I wish women would stop accepting the grumpiness. He's snapping at the kids, explain what makes a good dad in your mind. I'd be telling him straight later on.

Indeed. Grumpy is such an innocuous way to minimise being rude, dismissive, impatient and sharp with women and children who've done nothing to deserve it. Its not a harmless little quirk that's 'just his way'. You and your children should be treated with courtesy and respect OP.

Changingplace · 06/05/2023 14:37

He’s in a strop because he has to parent his own children?? Why is him being in charge of the kids not normal everyday life?

Jesus OP, you’ve got more problems that the coronation!

Original poster
NapoliTutti · 06/05/2023 14:39

Thanks yeah I agree. Im a firm believer in letting him have his space and stuff but it does have to work both ways. To be fair he has just text to apologise for being unreasonable and ‘sulking like a child.’

OP posts:
EvenMoney · 06/05/2023 14:42

Think I would have said OK and don't forget the kids are coming with you.

Agree with others this has nothing to do with the coronation but about him not wanting to help parent.

Fromage · 06/05/2023 14:43

Anyone else read the thread title and thought, That you, Meghan.....?

Glad he has apologised. It sounds like he didn't want you to watch the coronation. Hope you tell him you spent the morning indoctrinating the children into royalism. 😁

Whichnumbers · 06/05/2023 14:47

I very rarely ask him to look after the kids for a few hours, whereas he springs that stuff on me most weekends without notice.

you need to do this more often so he gets used to it, seems there is an imbalance and that needs changing

only ou shouldn't be asking, but arranging as they are his children and so he needs to take responsibility.

justasking111 · 06/05/2023 14:52

I'd have gone to family friends if he has form for this

DemelzaandRoss · 06/05/2023 14:53

Good for you. Selfish git of a DC. Purposely intending to spoil your day. Glad you stood your ground.

Justalittlebitduckling · 06/05/2023 15:10

He’s being totally unreasonable, but it might have made things clearer if you arranged to go and watch it somewhere else. Unfortunately it sounds like he just assumes you’re default parent if you’re both at home.

FernGully43 · 06/05/2023 15:10

Your husband is a prick.

Just like you, I love history but am no royalist. My husband took our toddler out for 2 hours to let me watch it in peace.

Flyingwithoutwings78 · 06/05/2023 15:11

I would love to have watched it, but being a single mum of a child with SEN there wasn't a chance. 😞

raincamepouringdown · 06/05/2023 15:12

Sissynova · 06/05/2023 14:21

Husband sulking at the coronation

He’s not sulking at the coronation, he’s sulking at having to be a parent to his own children. Hardly the marker of a “good” dad.

Yep

Hawkins003 · 06/05/2023 15:20

He was a pickle

willWillSmithsmith · 06/05/2023 15:31

NapoliTutti · 06/05/2023 14:39

Thanks yeah I agree. Im a firm believer in letting him have his space and stuff but it does have to work both ways. To be fair he has just text to apologise for being unreasonable and ‘sulking like a child.’

I hope you have minimised it in your reply. Don’t be saying ‘aw that’s ok honey it’s wasn’t that bad’ etc

WhereYouLeftIt · 06/05/2023 15:36

NightIsYoungSoAreWe · 06/05/2023 14:22

I actually think this is controlling and abusive.
Leading you on with the plan then changing at the last minute so you are the one who suffers and cant do what you want just so he can do what he wants, he values his own wants over yours.
Then sulks and acts like a dick when you rightfully put your foot down which is to pressure you into giving into him.
And all of this in front of children.

"so you are the one who suffers and cant do what you want just so he can do what he wants, he values his own wants over yours"

Worse than that. He's not doing "what he wants", he's doing random shit to stop her doing what OP wants.

Crunchymum · 06/05/2023 15:38

On what planet is a man who rarely has his the kids in his own for a few hours a good dad?

Mojoj · 06/05/2023 15:38

Just another petulant entitled man. MN is full of them, according to their partners.

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