Bum guns...

[LongTermLurker]

...AKA handheld bidets. AIBU to think they're brilliant, and anyone who is content with wiping their arse with dry tissue is a barbarian?

A bum gun is something completely different in my line of work (operating theatres - colorectal surgery).

Nah, it’s all about Japanese toilets. They’re the best.

I guess it depends how they are plumbed.
We lived in a house with a viscious one, plumbed into the cold water. It was chilly in winter!
I didn't use it. DH did in the summer.

Mine is warm, but I don't think I'd be deterred from being de-turd even if it was cold.

Haven't tried a Japanese toilet, but I assume (maybe incorrectly) that the drying takes a while. Unless it's like a Dyson airblade for the butt?

Keep meaning to get one installed!

YANBU I spent time in SE Asia and was converted. They are the height of civilisation.

So how do you get dry after washing? Do you have a special bum towel (one per person surely) by the loo?

It’s usually goes like this:

wipe with tissue first to get the larger prices of residue off
wash with handheld bidet
pat dry with tissue.

best feeling ever!!!!

Pieces!

Yep, dry with loo roll.

The bum gun is the norm in much of Asia and the Middle East, and I think they are on the cusp of going mainstream here in the UK. More people than you think have them in the UK, it just doesn't really come up in polite conversation. Having a bum gun is the new veganism, mark my words.
DH is from an Asian and always had a bum gun growing up, and I got one plumbed in as a surprise for him while he was away on a business trip. He was very chuffed.

*from an Asian country I mean

Please don’t explain you use your version! 😂

Loved them on an extended weekend trip to Finland where they're in every office. Planning to get one installed if I ever get around to renovating my bathroom. In the meantime, a handheld squeezy bottle will have to do - just a nuisance with the constant filling it up again.

This made me imagine people bum gunning at their desks. What a prospect.

There's some issue with getting them plumbed in though, something about valves and backflow of dirty water, it sounded potentially conicated and expensive to do properly. However I have a hand held squeezy bottle one which works quite well.

I installed one after living abroad for years, totally converted! It now disgusts me that people just wipe with dry tissue, that is not clean. And then people talk on here about having sex without cleaning up first 🤮
In the between time of having it installed I used wipes and binned them.

So it sprays poo around your toilet and presumably onto the backs of your legs? Lovely.

No it's a little hose you spray on your bumhole 🤣 while sat down. Feels good and so clean after.

What on earth do you think people are
doing with them? Standing up and having a half shower? You just spray it at your
bum while sitting down 😂😂 nothing is running down your legs or all over the toilet.

People who just wipe with toilet paper are grim. It’s like cleaning dishes with tissue paper 😅🤮🤮🤮

I'm somewhat puzzled by the bum gun technique... posters saying use them while sitting down, but my somewhat large bum entirely fills the toilet seat - I have to half-stand just to be able to wipe with toilet paper. I can't imagine being able to spray without dirty water flying everywhere.

My technique (I'm sure you are interested) is to wash at the sink, and dry with a washcloth. Yes, a different washcloth every time. I picked up this prctice from a Arabic friend, who had a huge pile of washcloths in their bathroom, with a laundry bin for the used ones.

Since, to my bemusement, nobody has commented on "deterred from being de-turd", I'm going to post just to tip my hat for that.

Don’t you just kind of skooch forward to the very edge of the front? Even if larger bottomed I think logistics should work

Yes lean forward, the water only goes in the desired place.