Page 4 | To dread bank holidays?

Nellie8 · 2023-05-06T06:24:57+00:00

I wish we didn't have bank holiday weekends. I've got 2 pre school kids and family stuff I have to go to. I just like our routine and I like my job and I struggle with bank holiday weekends. It just seems too much time to fill. The noise is constant. My mum is difficult and expects certain things. My 4 year DD is very full on and often has mini meltdowns. She just wants to watch screens or she is so hyper (think loo rolls being run about, her emptying the washing machine, stuffing food down the back of the sofa). I just feel I should be all positive about not having to go to work but I miss it. Am I being an old misery guts?

NewNovember · 07/05/2023 16:46

Yabu most people jump at the chance at more time with the family . Have you been to the GP to check if you are depressed?

Snaketime · 07/05/2023 16:50

I live in a tourist area and bank holidays are Hell. Most of the locals dont even bother leaving their homes during bank holidays as there is no point. Both me and my DH work in industries that dont close on bank holidays so are both expected to work while trying to sort childcare for 2 SEN kids. I would much rather lock my doors and hide during bank holidays.
I always hope it rains on a bank holiday.

Whataninsight · 07/05/2023 16:58

Nellie8 · 06/05/2023 07:53

@Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse I think that's the issue...I'm not convinced I actually do enjoy spending all this time with my friends and family. That's awful to write down. But whether its my baby, my crazy 4 year old, my husband, or my snobby mother - I just feel pressure from all of them, on at me constantly. I mean obviously expected of the kids but I find 3 solid days with them all a lot - which is horrible to admit. I would feel better if it wasn't going to rain but taking the kids outside is the only time the pressure eases. Being indoors or at family events feels like a pressure cooker

You don’t sound happy OP

whether that’s on a bank holiday weekend or a Tuesday morning or Friday night.

sounds like you are only happy when you’re at work

Whataninsight · 07/05/2023 16:59

Toottooot · 07/05/2023 15:02

Delighted about it - 3 year old will be in nursery and I have a day to myself. Happy days.

Wow on a bank holiday?

Toottooot · 07/05/2023 17:04

Whataninsight · 07/05/2023 16:59

Wow on a bank holiday?

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Yes - why wow?

cherry2727 · 07/05/2023 17:08

This has nothing to do with the bank holiday but your family life . You need to make some changes on your life in order to feel more relaxed and peaceful. It's only an additional day in a week of 7- it can't possible bring this much distress to your life!

Thepeopleversuswork · 07/05/2023 17:15

5128gap · 06/05/2023 09:14

You're just at a stage where your personal life is harder, less rewarding and less enjoyable than your professional life. Its more common with young DC then people will admit. Why do you think so many men have to work over so often?
Lower your expectations, get through it, and remember that before you know it, they'll be grown up, and the lie ins, pub lunches and adult centred socials to be back on again.

This. Days off when you have small children are always pretty stressful.

But also why do you feel so much pressure to do stuff with your mother? It sounds like you don’t like her and find her stressful to be around. It isn’t mandatory for you to spend all your free time with her.

aSofaNearYou · 07/05/2023 17:26

I'm self employed so they literally just mean my DD is not at nursery and I'm being blocked from getting on with the work I still need to do. Three in one month is taking the piss.

Whataninsight · 07/05/2023 17:27

Toottooot · 07/05/2023 17:04

Yes - why wow?

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No nurseries open around here tomorrow

Toottooot · 07/05/2023 17:32

Whataninsight · 07/05/2023 17:27

No nurseries open around here tomorrow

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Nae luck -but my child’s nursery is open and I will take advantage of that.

Fairislefandango · 07/05/2023 17:32

I love them! I have tons of work to do this weekend, and the 3 day weekend means that I have some time to chill out with my family too. I've never not been glad to have a Bank Holiday weekend tbh, whatever age my dc were.

SchoolShenanigans · 07/05/2023 17:35

YANBU. It's bloody hard work with toddlers. Work is infinitely easier. I think the trick is to have lots planned so you don't feel bad with them having screen time in the down time.

You are not alone!

AgnesX · 07/05/2023 17:37

CreeperBoom · 07/05/2023 16:43

Maybe, but I think is more common in scotland. E.g. when I worked for a UK wide company, Scottish worked got bank holidays as floating days, and English workers had to take the bank holidays. This was because they couldn't make scotland take the English holidays but didn't want everyone is scotland off, when the English offices were all working on the Scottish days.

I don't know anyone who actually has to take bank holidays. Even my DC's school was in on Easter Monday last year. I get the impression that is much less common in England? Irrelevant to the OP though.

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I've lived in both places and had to take bh's in both and regardless of who I've worked for )not to mention the vets and dentist are both closed tomorrow too. Ive always worked for UK wide companies as well, hence organisational. 🤷‍♀️

grinner83 · 07/05/2023 17:55

ConstanceReid · 07/05/2023 15:10

I don't work Mondays, so all these bank holiday Mondays are annoying me.

Aren't you entitled to pay or time off in lieu though? I thought that's how it works with part time people (and I'm a business owner, so if I'm wrong my part time team member has had extra benefits 😂).

Original poster

Nellie8 · 08/05/2023 07:25

@berksandbeyond @grinner83

Yeah I don't "allow" her to act like that. I always tell her to not make a mess. She has zero impulse control. So she'll be drinking a glass of water then she'll pour it on the ground and instantly say "sorry, who did that?" And then start to clear it up (as I always get up her to clear up). Doesn't matter how many times I tell her not to make a mess she just suddenly will do something. I'm trying my best. I'm not lounging around "allowing" her to do stuff. She tells me "I don't know why I did that".

OP posts:

Diymesss · 08/05/2023 07:44

Things my 3.5 yo did this weekend - got a tub of face cream from my room and smeared it everywhere, managed to get her poo on several toys, ran off with a pooey bum and smeared it on her bedsheets. So I get you!

The weather is pants too so now have to take the kids to one of the few indoor kids places in the local area. It will be packed with other screaming kids. But spent most of yesterday playing at home so feel need to escape today! If it was a remotely warm or dry day we’d go to the beach. No none of us find that fun in torrential rain, lightning and wind… for the people who say you just need the right clothes.

Diymesss · 08/05/2023 07:51

Though it’s hard work it has been nice to spend some extra time cuddling kids on sofa though. Usually I have to work full time so they’re out most of the day. I’m single so don’t have husband ‘suggesting’ things for us (me) to do/ranting about things, life is more peaceful since he left!

PollyPut · 08/05/2023 07:54

If she's very physical then I'd be taking her to park/to play sport more and then coming home when she is hopefully more tired and sitting her down with some art. Could you find a mini tennis court (or hire one) and hit balls together? Start getting her into sport?

I did wonder based on your post if you Is your Mum stopping you taking your children out for physical exercise. If so can you discuss with her - can she come too?

sandgrown · 08/05/2023 07:56

When I owned a hotel we were really busy at bank holidays and I envied people who had a day off . When I got divorced and changed profession my ex often kept the DC for the extra day at bank holiday and it could be quite lonely as friends were doing family stuff . Now they are all adults I just make plans or do nothing but I do enjoy the extra day off from my horrible job .

Dollmeup · 08/05/2023 08:04

I know exactly how you feel. I want to take my days off when I actually want them, and it is not relaxing with small children.

Everything is either closed for the day or ridiculously busy. My partner is still working so it's not like we are getting a day off to all spend time together.

My eldest is autistic and has ADHD so this is just messing up her routine. I'll be glad to get back to normal tomorrow!

Maybe I'll enjoy them in a few years when everyone is older and more settled but right now it's just extra stress for all of us.

Slitheringheights · 08/05/2023 08:18

NightIbble · 06/05/2023 09:05
As a retail worker I would love Bank Holidays off!

Snap!!

CindersAgain · 08/05/2023 08:24

AgnesX · 07/05/2023 17:37

I've lived in both places and had to take bh's in both and regardless of who I've worked for )not to mention the vets and dentist are both closed tomorrow too. Ive always worked for UK wide companies as well, hence organisational. 🤷‍♀️

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That’s my experience too, get the choice now I’m in Scotland, didn’t in England.

Hawkins003 · 08/05/2023 08:27

MathsNervous · 06/05/2023 07:27

This is the third week of this for us now. Getting fed up with it.

Then why click, and comment or even read it.

Whataninsight · 08/05/2023 08:30

Nellie8 · 08/05/2023 07:25

@berksandbeyond @grinner83

Yeah I don't "allow" her to act like that. I always tell her to not make a mess. She has zero impulse control. So she'll be drinking a glass of water then she'll pour it on the ground and instantly say "sorry, who did that?" And then start to clear it up (as I always get up her to clear up). Doesn't matter how many times I tell her not to make a mess she just suddenly will do something. I'm trying my best. I'm not lounging around "allowing" her to do stuff. She tells me "I don't know why I did that".

At school or starting in September?

Original poster

Nellie8 · 08/05/2023 09:04

@Whataninsight only just 4 so school in Sep.

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