I'm accidentally a bad dog owner

[LetDownDog]

Name changed for this.

Please be a little gentle.

Ok.... So, I had dogs growing up from birth til I left home. Always thought I knew them. We had several different breeds.

About 2 years ago we, as a family, finally decided after much deliberation to get a dog. Thought it would be nice for DC to learn to care for something and develop empathy skills etc.. learn to help a bit. But mostly DH and I just wanted to make our house a home, and loved the idea of a dog to snuggle in the evening while watching movies, or taking him/her for long family walks etc ..

We spent a good year researching what would make a suitable pet for us. We had wanted a dog a long time, but waited til I was work from home and DCs old enough to handle dog well and to be safe around dog. We waited til we lived somewhere with a garden, near appropriate fields for off lead walking etc...

We visited a few dogs, researched some online, and eventually after a year of actively looking, we found one that seemed perfect for us. He was a Labrador cross (trying stay anonymous, so not saying what crossed with - but think along lines of a collie or working dog). We knew he'd require 2 good long, off lead walks a day

For some stupid reason, I considered the following:
-will i be at home to keep him company - yes
-suitable for family - yes
-able to provide walks - yes
-garden space - yes
-suitable walking areas for off lead - yes

• Children old enough etc.. - yes

-good temperament - yes

But now we have said dog I discover he needs 3 or 4 X 1 hour + walks a day (I had banked on 2). I can cope with that. What I can't cope with is how much attention he needs. How much mental stimulation. I have no idea why I didn't consider this.

He constantly wants to play, is in between my feet, eats everything in sight if I don't play with him, follows me around. He needs so so much stimulation.

1. AIBU not to have thought about this (I guess I am, but it's not really covered in any of the stuff I read about finding the right breed for the family etc..)

1. How do you keep a dog stimulated? We now send him to a dog play group once a week so he can play with other dogs (which he also does on his walks), and have fun and stimulation. But we can't afford it daily. Any tips??? Pleeeease. We want to stick with him, would never consider re homing unless it was in his v best interests, we love him. But...how do we keep him entertained while also working, making dinner for the children etc...?? He has toys, chew sticks, balls etc...

Help! I genuinely thought we did everything right prior to getting him!

We had one of these - they aren't cheap but our dog loved it! It only lasted 3 months max though, and when we complained they said it was only designed to last a certain number of throws and apparently our dog used an entire lifetime of throws in less than 3 months 🤦‍♀️😂

I only feed my dogs like this - lobbing it out into the garden so they can go and hunt for it. 😂 I hold back a little bit for the evening though as one of them can be a bit stubborn about coming back in after his evening wee, so I tempt him back in then with it.

You sound like a really good owner. I think as others have said you need to teach to him to settle, it sounds like too much exercise. Our 11 month gets 2 walks a day, one 30/40 min morning with some off lead ( we have only recently started this as we didn't want her over exercised too young) and a 20 min walk in the afternoon.

At one point I realised I was giving her so much attention in the house, that I had to make myself pull back so she doesn't follow me around all the time and will happily lie in one room whilst I get on with stuff.

@JetWashingIsMyHobby My dog is exactly the same at being reluctant to come in after his last wee. 🤣 He is a stubborn Westie, so this has become his "dentastix" time, just before bed and it works every single time. As soon as he hears that cupboard door go, he's in and sat down waiting for his dentastix.
Because he is a small dog he suffers with his tummy if he doesn't have something to eat before bed so this is perfect. It's funny how we adapt things to create a routine and get what we want. 😂 I never knew that with dogs you needed to learn the art of negation and bribery! 😂

The kong wobbler to feed their kibble is good. We also put kibble and/or treats in a snuffle mat and

There is something called 'Capturing calm' so that when, for instance, they don't bark at an unexpected event in the garden, you notice and praise them for it. A down time place works too, so 'in your basket now' means 'that's it for a while,' and they can switch off their 'alert' mode. It's also really useful for when they come in wet in winter- they soon learn to flake out on an old towel instead of getting everywhere damp. Lots of old fashioned tricks, like 'stay' and them staying while you go out of sight, and 'leave it' where you leave a treat or little biscuit on a paw until you say 'ok', all those self control and concentration things wear them out, and are really useful too. And using hand signals at first with words, and then without, so they have to watch you. You can keep a dog entertained and busy without walking miles. They are so rewarding to teach.

Why honestly do they not put this in ads? I have never heard people say ‘you will spend more time with your dog than anyone else!’ (Even the kids!) I love our little man but it’s true that it’s like having a newborn crossed with a toddler!!

I’ve got a year old lab. We have one hour walk a day, but on that walk she sees her high energy best mate and they roll about, run, wrestle etc. by the time she’s back she’s barely able to keep her eyes open. She might become a bit terrible later but then the kids are mucking about with her, and that knackers her out.

Find your dog a BFF!