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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that driving 10hrs overnight with toddler is a good idea?!

140 replies

MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:02

DS is 21 months and we are going away for 10 days in the UK. To drive it’s 10hrs and we were thinking of driving overnight. He doesn’t go to bed until 9pm, so we would probably leave around 8pm, keep him entertained for the first hour, then hopefully he will go to sleep. Imagine we would arrive around 7am with a couple loo/coffee stops, and this would be his usual wakeup time. We will share the driving and one of us will be in the back with him at all times.

Are we mad to do this? Has anyone got any experience of this? We are going on holiday with family, so they will be able to help with DS the next day while we catch up on a bit of sleep. Also can’t find any info, but the 2hr in the car seat rule must not apply once they are toddlers??

The alternative is leave the house at 6am, 2hr drive, bus to airport, 2hrs in the airport, 1.5hr flight, 2.5hr drive out the other side. I just feel like that’ll be so much more stressful, and DS isn’t a good sleeper, so all that sitting still will most likely result in a terrible night first night of our hols.

What would you do?!

OP posts:
RagzRebooted · 03/05/2023 17:03

Definitely drive overnight, just don't plan anything for the first day!

rainraingoawaay · 03/05/2023 17:03

Would you guys not be absolutely shattered being awake with a toddler all day then driving for the hours?

Leftoverssandwich · 03/05/2023 17:05

We've done many overnight drives across Europe with children and it's fine. We swap over and get some sleep in turn. I wouldn't want to do it more than one night in a row but it does the job.

careerthink · 03/05/2023 17:06

I would stay over night somewhere on the way down to split the driving up, that sounds miserable to me tbh, and what if the toddler doesn't sleep!

monotonemusings · 03/05/2023 17:08

Driving overnight for that long and then dealing with a toddler the next day sounds awful to me

Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:08

@RagzRebooted if does seem like the less stressful option doesn’t it!

@rainraingoawaay quite possibly! We would both try and get a nap in the day at some point though.

@Leftoverssandwich great thank you. We’ve done an 8hr drive once before when he was 9 months, but that was in the day and we stopped every 2hrs. Seems like it would be a lot easier if overnight with a toddler if asleep the whole time!

OP posts:
Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:13

@careerthink he’s much more likely to sleep in the car than somewhere random tbh. He currently only naps in the car, and seems to be extremely alert to new surroundings - any time we have travelled first few nights are always a bit tricky as he struggles to switch off in new environments. Holidays are great fun 😅

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 03/05/2023 17:14

Just be prepared for them to the awkward toddler thing of NOT sleeping when you want them too!!

Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:14

@monotonemusings my parents will be around to help - they’re great with him as have him one day a week so that I can work, so expect they’d be more than happy to have him for the morning or something while we get some sleep!

OP posts:
Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:15

@PuttingDownRoots haha thanks, it’s definitely a possibility, but no way of knowing having not tried it before I guess

OP posts:
BallandBoe · 03/05/2023 17:17

I would definitely drive overnight but be prepared to divert to Holiday Inn/Travelodge/etc if it all goes horribly wrong!

FionnulaTheCooler · 03/05/2023 17:17

Driving overnight is great, we had to do it last summer after something went badly wrong in our holiday let and we had to pack up and leave immediately. No traffic on the roads and all the motorway services were deserted so no queueing for anything.

Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 17:21

@BallandBoe great suggestion, we actually have family with a property about 7hrs away (not exactly on route) so we could always head there if needs be and do the rest of the journey the next day!

@FionnulaTheCooler sorry to hear you had to cut your trip short! Thanks for sharing your experience ☺️ I’m assuming it’s fine for toddlers to travel for long periods in the car, unlike babies?! He will only nap in the car, so he’s definitely comfortable in his car seat

OP posts:
Calmdown14 · 03/05/2023 17:48

Where is the journey to and from?

We normally opt for a 4am start but depends where you would hit traffic etc. Or if there are any amenities open for a loo break (we are north Scotland and these run out!)

Is there anywhere you could stop and have breakfast and a play? We often break the journey north at Moffat as it's just off the road but has a nice park and good car parking.

If you give us an idea where then people will have useful suggestions.

Personally I find full overnight harder than an early start where I can get a decent sleep first rather than have had a full day and then drive

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 03/05/2023 18:03

I’d rather the flight option- a toddler won’t have a full nights sleep upright in the car, it will be a disturbed sleep imo. If you wake them early and travel, likelihood is they will sleep on the plane or the other side car ride.

Reallyareyousure · 03/05/2023 18:09

Doesn't sound overly safe. The driver will be shattered.

itsgettingweird · 03/05/2023 18:28

We use to drive overnight but stop.

So dinner, bath and pjs. In car for 7pm and drive half the journey.

Stop at a hotel for midnight (plenty of service stations have travelodges/ days inn etc - just tell them you're arriving late).

Sleep until morning and then get in car for 7/8am with snacks for toddler and drive for 2/ 2.5 hours. Stop for breakfast and run around at a service station and then finish journey.

Arrive for just after lunch and eat, run around work or whatever whilst waiting for check in to start.

lemonyellows · 03/05/2023 18:30

My kids always woke up when a car stopped. Risky!!

Original poster
MintGreenLife · 03/05/2023 18:38

@itsgettingweird mines an awful sleeper away from home. I don’t think staying off at a travel lodge etc would be an option for us as he’s so tuned into new environments he finds it very hard to shut off. Likelihood is nobody would get any sleep if we stopped for the night, whereas in the car one of us can be sleeping in the back and then swap as and when needed.

OP posts:
happypoobum · 03/05/2023 18:38

I don’t understand how this would work.

Surely you would have to transition to the adults sleeping during the day so they would be safe to drive for ten hours throughout the night.

It sounds pretty dangerous to me.

MatildaTheCat · 03/05/2023 18:41

My parents drove us down to the South of France overnight when we were young. They put the back seats down, chucked in some padding and tucked all 3 of us up in our sleeping bags. I guess our luggage was on the roof rack. We must have looked a total sight 😂.

In their defence it was the 70s, we were absolutely awful about squabbling in the car and it was probably worth the effort.

Go for it but I’d recommend using appropriate restraints 😀

Wanttoshavemyhairoff · 03/05/2023 18:44

personally I’d get the plane! 10 hours overnight driving sounds like hell to me . Toddler won’t get a good nights sleep in that position and the adult in the back won’t get any sleep worrying the driver might fall asleep !!
The toddler will sleep on the plane after early start and a run around the airport and another nap on journey from airport or a late afternoon nap .
good luck either way !

TeenLifeMum · 03/05/2023 18:44

I’d leave at 4/5pm and entertain/keep awake, then stop for dinner at 7.30pm and a run around. Put pjs on at service station and do the rest of the drive so you arrive early hours and can get some sleep before morning.

Okki · 03/05/2023 18:45

We've done it with ours for the last 15 years. Makes life much easier when child is sleeping. DH and I take shifts and if we're really knackered stop to sleep if we need to and don't need to worry about DC's (teens now) as they're asleep.

We've also found we generally get a second wind on arrival and because we have managed the odd few hours of sleep, we can power on through to bedtime.

Okki · 03/05/2023 18:46

Actually, we've done it for the last 20 odd years - pre dc we did it to miss the traffic!