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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think ^I'm^ not the queue jumper here?

122 replies

GretaGip · 03/05/2023 16:57

Went to fuel up today and paid for a car wash.

I drove around the to the start of the car wash and there was a car parked there, which I thought was odd as Id been the only person in the shop.

A man got out of his car and then wandered to the shop.

Menopausal rage ensued and I thought I wasn't having him push in. Obviously the convention is you get your ticket first then get in the queue.

So I drove around the front and precision reversed in.

Got out the car and put my code in as he walked back from the shop.

Apparently I'm a fucking bitch for doing this, according to the charmer in the parked audi.

So, Aibu to reclaim my rightful place in the queue?

OP posts:
LookItsMeAgain · 04/05/2023 11:31

So the order in which things happened is this right? 😕

You, OP, got your fuel and paid for said fuel and a car wash at the same time and then drove to the car wash and noticed there was another car there already?

Audi driver got fuel, drove to the car wash, then paid for fuel & car wash but in the meantime, OP manoeuvred their car to be in front of Audi because they hadn't paid for fuel and car wash before approaching car wash machine?

My goodness, you've little to be worried about OP. And yes, I would think you did jump the queue because it was clear even to you that there was a car waiting for the car wash.

Did Covid queuing not teach you anything????? 😆😆😆

MaybeSmaller · 04/05/2023 11:31

I’m with you OP, it’s the equivalent of putting your jacket on a table in a busy cafe and then going to queue for your food. So bloody annoying.

Not the point of the thread but what are you supposed to do here? Queue for your food and risk there not being a table free for you to eat it at, so you have to stand around awkwardly while it gets cold?

Aishlynn · 04/05/2023 11:31

I’d say YABU, but I’ve never used a car wash without first buying petrol so the order is obvious. If I didn’t need petrol and rye station was empty, I think I’d somewhat he did

TheOrigRights · 04/05/2023 11:35

ejbaxa · 04/05/2023 10:26

I think she used this to explain her rage, not her subsequent actions. And rage is a pretty normal part of menopause.

Show quote history

As a 52 year old woman I want my rage to be just rage, not put down to the bloody menopause.
Thank you.

ejbaxa · 04/05/2023 11:43

TheOrigRights · 04/05/2023 11:35

As a 52 year old woman I want my rage to be just rage, not put down to the bloody menopause.
Thank you.

Show quote history

yes but op is talking about her own rage - not your rage 😵‍💫

DustyLee123 · 04/05/2023 11:44

When using my local car wash you can only park at the entrance of it while you get a ticket. It’s just tough if you get there second.

W0tnow · 04/05/2023 11:45

I think the rage that needs highlighting here is the dick in the Audi. Maybe she pushed in, maybe she didn’t. But to call her a fucking bitch? Tosser.

TheOrigRights · 04/05/2023 11:46

ejbaxa · 04/05/2023 11:43

yes but op is talking about her own rage - not your rage 😵‍💫

Show quote history

Correct, but it is used more frequently to explain why a woman might be angry.
It used to be "ohhh, is it your time of the month?".

NO! I'm just fucking angry!

SoCunningYouCanStickATailOnItAndCallItAFox · 04/05/2023 11:49

Car washes rarely have a Q so I don't think there is an etiquette for him to have broken in this scenario.
I would have felt mildly irritated but not that bothered.
From his pov he went to a car wash, no Q, nipped for his ticket.

I think his reaction was unpleasant but your behaviour was the one which put the friction into the situation. I think if we all just were a bit more patient and accepting of grey areas life would be better all round.

needcheese · 04/05/2023 11:49

I voted YABU for using a car wash! Just think of what it is doing to your paintwork!

SoupDragon · 04/05/2023 11:51

needcheese · 04/05/2023 11:49

I voted YABU for using a car wash! Just think of what it is doing to your paintwork!

Cleaning it mostly I imagine.

finallygotospeaktoSky · 04/05/2023 11:54

Flip it round a woman parks at the car wash a man reverses in.
She gets angry and swears and calls him a fucking twat.
By Mn standards [and this thread] she's a twat too.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/05/2023 11:55

Well my minds blown that most car washes don't seem to be self service with a chip and pin at the entrance....that's what all the ones I've used have been like. I've never bought a ticket or a had to get a code before...

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/05/2023 11:56

Sorry, posted too soon.

Is it possible that he, like me, hadn't encountered a car wash where you can't pay at the entrance so had pulled up expecting to just make his selection and tap his card but then found out he had to go into the station to pre-pay?

Iwasafool · 04/05/2023 11:57

At my local car wash you drive round, joining the queue if there is one, pay contactless when it's your turn. Very civilised.

BitOutOfPractice · 04/05/2023 11:58

You bought your ticket first. You were there first.

brava I say. I’d have felt the same. I’m not sure I’d have risked the reversing but I would’ve wanted to.

CheersForThatEh · 04/05/2023 11:58

The name calling is awful.

But WTAF were you thinking?? Did you have no time to wait 5 minutes? Is the chip on your shoulder that big?? Wss it a sense of justice...over a car wash??

I just think if I was watching you I'd think you were a loon!

Tarantullah · 04/05/2023 12:01

I never use one as I quite like the paintwork on my car, but I used to work in a petrol station and the vast majority of people would park by it, get their code and then head back and go straight in. There isn't a right or wrong, although of course he response is never justified.

Frabbits · 04/05/2023 12:13

YANBU. Ticket first, and then queue. Otherwise you are just holding everyone else up.

Aishlynn · 04/05/2023 12:15

I rather suspect the OP may well have used fruity language herself before the Audi driver’s insult

KittyAlfred · 04/05/2023 12:27

YANBU.
What he did is like putting your supermarket trolley in the queue at the till, then going and getting your shopping.
And as someone else said, there’s no way he’d have sworn at a man.

Premiumchange · 04/05/2023 12:30

HeyDemonsItsYaGirl · 03/05/2023 19:55

This trend of blaming any behaviour on the menopause is really irritating.

As is blaming behaviour on being pregnant, and on it being "the time of the month".

PhillySub · 04/05/2023 12:33

Besides people only being allowed to use the car wash your way, you escalated the situation with your own impatience. You got ratty with what he did and then he got ratty with what you did.

TheGoogleMum · 04/05/2023 12:45

You both overreacted. He is more unreasonable for blocking and then being rude and misogynistic, you overreacted by reversing in. You are both very impatient - having to wait for the other to finish was so annoying from both points of view

Mardiarse · 04/05/2023 13:06

Looks like you where looking for a fight, coz menopause innit.
When you could have just opened a dialogue with him before he disappeared into the shop. Instead you decided to childishly prove a point about car parking etiquette and he responded in kind.
Also imagining you dramatically keying in your code to further prove your point and this is what provoked the insult.
Think you both sound like pair of fuckwits tbh.