To be utterly seething at the audacity of STBXDP and his family?

[Perpetuallyexhaustedtoddlermum]

I had a nagging feeling yesterday in light of the abuse I've been experiencing that I should prepare a go bag with myself and DS essential documents and some clothing so I could pass it over to my Ddad when he's next visiting.
I come to find my own birth certificate but DS birth certificate has miraculously gone missing, I go onto the website to reorder one and I see that my sons name has been changed 3 times without my consent. I confronted soon to be exDP and he was so obviously lying that I know he took the birth certificate and put himself right in it when he said that a child's name can't be changed without parental consent and I know his mother is involved because he's thick as shit, she's the brains of the operation.
I can't understand why or how they've done this, DS is known to the Drs and the health visitor under the name I believe he had.
What on earth can I do about this other than obviously go to the police after I've spoken to my councils births, deaths and marriages department to ask for what proof was provided to do the name changes and make it known that I didn't consent to any of it and mention that he is still known by his name at with health services and the DWP and HMRC on my benefits awards.

That's creepy af what he is doing. Get the police and ds involved asap

When you change a name it doesn't automatically get filtered down through all the other services etc. you'd need to send proof and ask for records to be updated. It's like if you change your name when you get married - if you then wish for it to be changed on your passport/health records/drivers licence etc you would send that agency evidence of the name change (marriage certificate) and they'll update accordingly.

Why 3 different name changes though! Like you say what a thicko that he's so undecided. Can imagine a case of "well I'll change his last name to match mine only", did it take him 3 times to spell it correctly?

You mentioned OP that your soon to be ex doesn’t have a passport. Do you know this for sure.

If he can meddle with your sons name without you knowing he can do a lot more.

This is so bizarre, especially 3 times before the child is 2!?! Is the father on the original birth certificate ie does he even have parental responsibility? Has he changed first name/ middle name or surname? The latter is much more serious. Has he changed the names to his family names rather than yours?

I would imagine this will look very bad for your ex in court, when the time comes, if that's any consolation.

If you have a solicitor (and if you anticipate ending up in court you should have one) then you need to get them on this soon.

.

What website are you using that a 2 year olds birth record is online?

They arent!

Yeah he is named on the birth certificate and all name changes have been surname changes. First to my surname only as opposed to the double barrel on the birth certificate and then the second name change was to my ex's bio dads last name that he doesn't have but his older sister does and then the most recent one is to my ex's last name.
I really need to get to the bottom of this. I can't wait till Tuesday so I can start making phone calls and potentially getting injunctions sorted.

It's the councils births deaths and marriages website where you can go and order replacement copies of things and I saw what I saw.

@TonTonMacoute I imagine once everything is exposed it'll look terrible for him and his family in terms of access to DS. I doubt they'll get anything unsupervised now. That's if they don't get custodial sentences for this nonsense.

Registrar here. If both of you are on the birth certificate, either of you can add/remove/change spelling of any of the forenames - this has to be done within 12 months of the original registration and you can’t change the surname this way. You can only change the surname if the child is re-registered to either add natural father or if unmarried parents subsequently get married. The only other way names can be changed through registration is if a correction has been applied to the registration and there is quite a convoluted process to achieve this including providing an application form and evidence (proving the correct information), a fee also has to be paid. I don’t understand how he’s been able to change the birth certificate at all without your knowledge or consent so I would definitely be asking some serious questions to the local registration service/general register office and seeking legal advice. Name changes by deed poll are different and cannot be used an evidence to change the birth entry. Hope all that helps in some way, and good luck x

Has your STBX or his mother changed your childs name in order to gain financially i.e child benefit, extra benefits etc ?

He could easily have acquired a passport without your knowledge. Inform the police today and ask to be connected with women's aid. You need to act on this now before your child is abducted or you are seriously hurt. Do it now please.

Yeah you've gotta wonder is there a benefits angle to it.

Maybe they're planning on claiming child benefit or the child part of UC or something for him and think if they can claim under a different name from what you claim for him under, they'll get it.

Who knows.

Can you tell if they ordered copies of birth certs with the changed names after changing them?

This would be my concern. I’d get the police involved asap

This is a big family of shady fuckers you married into if what you say is true. There's no way if
something like this happens I jump to my mil being involved so yours must be something else

Yes, absolutely focus on leaving… then you can face your STBX’s criminal offence and the admin headache of reverting your DC’s name. That he’d go to such deceptive lengths to change your DC’s name gets my own hackles up.

This is awful. As others have said, could they be claiming benefits for your ds under a different name? You definitely need to go the Police -can you go today?

@FlamingoQueen @TheVanguardSix @beckyre
Shady fuckers doesn't cover it. I had no idea until it was too late. I'm absolutely focused on getting myself and DS away from here ASAP because the possibility of kidnapping is now becoming very real. They have family in the south of Wales and we are in Cambridgeshire. If they get over there and start filing court orders it could be years before I see DS again. I'm contacting the police and my IVDA today.

If he’s done sit to claim benefits then he’s likely trying to manufacture a ‘paper trail’ of him being the resident parent.

If you can take DS and get out of there asap, can you go to your dads? Contact police and get the ball rolling on a prohibited steps order preventing him from removing your child from the jurisdiction asap.

I don't think the birth certificate itself has been changed but the deed polls that have been done are now attached to DS birth certificate. Three deed polls that I didn't consent to. Funny enough ex DP has consented to me changing DS to my name and I have proof of consent through text messages that he agrees to the name change and he's signed the consent letters and statements to go with the deed poll.
What on earth are these people doing?

@Perpetuallyexhaustedtoddlermum
sorry to hear of all this worry

you might want to consider asking MNHQ to delete any possibly identifying posts such as your location - sounds like you can’t be too careful with this chap and his family and you don’t want to risk being a further risk. (You may have already done this and the locations you mention may be different already?)

Are you at home OP? Can you get away somewhere tonight. Just to give yourself some breathing space. Doesn’t have to be family, a premier inn or bed and breakfast. This is sounding extremely shady and you must be really worried.