Page 15 | To ask you to share CF in law stories from your weddings?

Sconesandgravy · 2023-04-26T07:30:25+00:00

Please share your CF in law stories from your weddings. I need to know it's not just me that has one. I got married on Saturday. We had a micro wedding for multiple reasons. Our daughter, our closest friend each and their partner, and our parents or in my case parental. No siblings or other family. My Mother in Law is weirdly emeshed with DH's two older siblings and can't cope if they aren't included in everything. As we were cutting the cake, and having our moment, She shouts out "Make sure you save a piece for BIL, SIL and grandad!" After we'd served everyone she hacked off a huge messy chunk for them, rather than take the finger slices we'd been cutting rendering the rest of the top tier unusable. It sounds childish but out of all the "petty" moments of the day this one stuck out the most. I think it's because she "stole" my moment. I'm sure I'll laugh about it in years to come, but it's been four days and amongst the nastier things she did I am beyond angry. So I'm using MN as a form of catharsis, in the hopes that other people have nightmare in laws 😁

Kool4kats · 26/04/2023 18:58

My own mother was CF no1 at my wedding... Wearing a full length ivory gown. Apparently this was totally okay because it didn't look like a wedding dress. Despite being purchased from Monsoons bridal collection 🙄
CF no2 title is awarded to my SIL, who:
Suggested she made my invitations, hit me with a £160 bill for materials I'd not seen, agreed to, or chosen, and then dumped a full box of craft materials on my doorstep 2 months later, having decided she was too busy to make them. Yes. So was I, which is why I didn't want to fucking make them in the first place.
Said her husband (aspiring photographer) would do our wedding photography as a gift, then posted a bill for 3 grand(!!!) for photography a month before the wedding (for context total wedding budget was £5k, this was nearly 20years ago)
And finally, bought her bridesmaid daughter (age 6) a totally different fucking dress, did a stealth reveal at a family BBQ to limit my reaction and announced, it looked soooo much better and she knew I wouldn't mind. I did. And her daughter was the only one of 4 bridesmaids in a different dress. Pisses me off still everytime I look at the photos. At least my mum being in a wedding dress draws some of the attention away 🤦‍♀️

Pleasegodgotosleep · 26/04/2023 19:05

Uncle was invited to wedding with his GF. They split up so just him attending. Rearranged seating plan accordingly.
Night before wedding he announced he was bringing new GF (didn't ask). Rushed to venue changed seating plan again.
At wedding meal new GF announced she was veggie but didnt like the veggie options so requested cheese on toast!

sparkles82 · 26/04/2023 19:08

Pleasegodgotosleep · 26/04/2023 19:05

Uncle was invited to wedding with his GF. They split up so just him attending. Rearranged seating plan accordingly.
Night before wedding he announced he was bringing new GF (didn't ask). Rushed to venue changed seating plan again.
At wedding meal new GF announced she was veggie but didnt like the veggie options so requested cheese on toast!

Cheese on toast 🤣

CoffeeBeansGalore · 26/04/2023 19:21

Blondey2023 · 26/04/2023 09:19

Thats so pathetic of your MIL! You should definitely bring it up with her and hold her accountable.

My story isn't really a CF one as such, but my MIL has never warmed to me and even on our wedding day upon seeing me in my dress, not once did she tell me I looked nice/give me any positive words, NOTHING. She didn't congratulate us after the ceremony. She took loads of pics at the wedding, of which I'm in NONE OF THEM! Grrrr!

We couldn't afford a big white wedding so we eloped & took BiL & his wife as witnesses. We paid for professional photos. Afterwards we offered to pay for a framed photo of MiL's choice.

She chose one - of dh & bil. We gave her a framed one of the two of us. She kept the frame & changed the photo.

Maybe more hurtful than cf.

Nanny0gg · 26/04/2023 19:25

Fandabedodgy · 26/04/2023 18:58

@Nanny0gg

OFFS back at you.

Yes I've read it.

So what was the point of inviting grandparents who couldn't come?
And her siblings understood the reasons and were happy
Her husband's siblings would have ruined the wedding (aided by MiL) and he didn't want them there.

So why you think she was wrong is beyond me.

Cupcakequeen75 · 26/04/2023 19:37

Sconesandgravy · 26/04/2023 15:56

I don't blame you. I wish we'd stuck to our original plans with just our friends, because even though it wouldn't be eloping.. it would not have involved MIL 😂

Show quote history

I have no idea why certain posters are ganging up on you so much OP.
YOUR wedding, YOUR day, YOUR choices.
No one but you knows all the ins and outs of your life and some people are trying to fit your choices into their scenarios and coming up with 2+2=5.
Some of the people on here are clearly trying to goad you so well done for not getting wound up or going off on tangents of their making. 👍

Blondey2023 · 26/04/2023 19:42

CoffeeBeansGalore · 26/04/2023 19:21

We couldn't afford a big white wedding so we eloped & took BiL & his wife as witnesses. We paid for professional photos. Afterwards we offered to pay for a framed photo of MiL's choice.

She chose one - of dh & bil. We gave her a framed one of the two of us. She kept the frame & changed the photo.

Maybe more hurtful than cf.

Show quote history

What a horrid thing to do (and weird!!) Maybe her and my MIL are related 😂

Cc1998 · 26/04/2023 19:45

Dropzonefourpleaseben · 26/04/2023 12:13

My MIL phoned as l was getting ready for our wedding to ask me if me and DH would go to hospital between the service and the reception to visit her ‘friend’, saying that this friend would love to see me in my dress. I’ve never liked being the centre of attention, was stressed about the day anyway so the thought of going round a hospital in full bridal outfit tipped me over into tears. However, everyone seemed to think it was nice thing to do so we agreed. Long story short, the woman wasn’t a friend at, just an old neighbour who DH’s parents had lived next to thirty years earlier (my husband didn’t remember her) and when we got to the ward, she didn’t know who we were and obviously couldn’t have cared less!

You're an absolute mug for going. What is wrong with you?! I cannot imagine being this much of a pushover. I genuinely had to read this post twice.

GnomeDePlume · 26/04/2023 19:49

There are some people who always behave badly at big events. This doesnt matter when they are their own celebrations (big birthdays, wedding anniversaries) and their bad behaviour gets explained away as 'nerves' or 'the stress of organising everything'.

It's at a wedding where they arent at the centre of the event that you realise their behaviour is just part of who they are.

LaLaLouella · 26/04/2023 19:54

sparkles82 · 26/04/2023 13:08

So 15 years on since our wedding day and this still irks me!
So MIL’s Birthday is the day after our wedding, and it’s midnight at our reception and suddenly the music stops and the DJ makes an announcement that it’s the Mother of the Groom’s Birthday.
Birthday music starts up and everyone starts singing to her. I don’t have a clue who has organised it, but fine.
Then…MIL and FIL who have had extensive dancing lessons then take to the dance floor and perform this Strictly Come Dancing quick step with all of our guests gathered around the floor and clapping them.
I just stand there probably looking like a pissed off bitch!

I don't understand what's so terrible about this?

You had the whole day about your wedding, it turned into her birthday at midnight for about 15 minutes and you stood about looking pissed off. I guess it then reverted back to being your wedding. Jeez, glad you aren't my DIL.

LadyMuckingabout · 26/04/2023 19:55

Too true, @GnomeDePlume . I have a couple of relatives who seem to relish causing a scene when it’s anyone else’s day 🙁

Gilmorehill · 26/04/2023 19:56

Phos · 26/04/2023 18:02

My (now ex) MIL decided she was taking the cake home the day after the wedding. She was told by my grandma (who had paid for the cake amongst other things, my in laws didn’t contribute a penny) that she most certainly was not. Anyway everyone went home and it transpired some of the cake was in the box but a tier was missing and so was the extra cake the baker had done for us (it was fruit cake so she’d meant it as an anniversary present or something) MIL denied all knowledge, venue couldn’t find it so we had to accept they were lost.

Until a year or so later when both cakes turned up. As Christening cakes for my SIL’s latest brat. They’d had some icing put on them but some detail meant they were unmistakably the missing wedding cakes.

No way!! That’s one of the worst CFs I’ve heard of.

Whammyyammy · 26/04/2023 19:59

My husband went on a stag do to Vegas about 12 years ago. One night thregroom got huffy about something and stormed off and was agressive.

Next morning they all met for breakfast and all was OK. Once all home, it turned out groom went on a bender on his own, buying a £1500 bottle of rum and losing about £8000 gambling, money that was for the wedding.
Bride to be sent an invoice to each stag for about £1000 saying it was all their fault and if we didn't pay, then wouldn't be invited to the wedding.

Felt for her, but didn't pay, and don't think anyone else did. Never attended wedding.

GeorgiaGirl52 · 26/04/2023 20:01

My DD1 married a wonderful man. They had church wedding on a Saturday, all relatives on both sides invited. Reception following at grandparents' home because it was accessible for family members in wheelchairs. One bridesmaid, her best friend for 20 years. The groom's parents came but his two brothers did not -- their favorite college football team was in the semi-finals and they preferred to stay home and watch the game.

Frankola · 26/04/2023 20:02

My SIL wore a WHITE TULLE skirted dress!

My MIL brought a picnic and they kept it in the car. After the wedding, whilst photos were being taken and canapés and champagne were being handed out for guests she went to the car and got out a tonne of sandwiches wrapped in tin foil...DHs family then sat there scoffing them. As well as helping themselves to the canapés too. When DH mentioned it to them and asked why they brought food when canapés were provided and the wedding breakfast was being served just 60 mins after the service she simply said "we didn't want to be hungry" 😡

SIL gets married in a year. Yes i will be getting my own back. I don't care if its petty 😂

sparkles82 · 26/04/2023 20:04

LaLaLouella · 26/04/2023 19:54

I don't understand what's so terrible about this?

You had the whole day about your wedding, it turned into her birthday at midnight for about 15 minutes and you stood about looking pissed off. I guess it then reverted back to being your wedding. Jeez, glad you aren't my DIL.

Show quote history

🙄

NotOnMyChristianiMinecraftServer · 26/04/2023 20:07

LaLaLouella · 26/04/2023 19:54

I don't understand what's so terrible about this?

You had the whole day about your wedding, it turned into her birthday at midnight for about 15 minutes and you stood about looking pissed off. I guess it then reverted back to being your wedding. Jeez, glad you aren't my DIL.

Show quote history

I imagine it would not have been so terrible had she asked the bride and grooms permission. The fact that she kept it secret is proof that she knew she was doing something wrong.

TempyBrennan · 26/04/2023 20:12

Mine - didn’t even turn up. So that what nice.

his - she sat with a face like a smacked arse because she wasn’t allowed to sit next to my husband. Took a thousand pictures and not one of me and husband as a couple, shared them all on social media within minutes and I was cut out of every one 🙂

OhhhBiscuits · 26/04/2023 20:27

I’m getting married in 2 month and I’m wishing we had eloped reading these 😵‍💫

SpicedPumpkinLatte · 26/04/2023 20:27

EggInANest · 26/04/2023 10:24

Not my wedding. The brother of my first long term, live in boyfriend was getting married. I was very close to his family, involved in loads of family occasions.

The brother’s fiancés family paid for the wedding and reception. Mid summer wedding, beautiful cold buffet, salmon , fresh strawberries etc.

Grooms family outraged that it was not a hot meal. Also they are of a culture which features spicy food.

They ambushed the Reception. Numerous relatives had turned up with big pots of hot food, put it in the venue before the service, and then Ta Daaaa! Just as everyone sat down for the meal they opened the serving hatch and invited a queue. All ‘their’ side and half the others rushed over, abandoning plates of beautifully poached salmon.

The bride’s family’s jaws hit the deck in unison.

This is standard if it's a South Asian family. You don't have a wedding, or any function, without serving a hot meal. You don't even have a house guest without offering a hot snack or meal tbf.

It's overstepping, but also a massive culture clash and the groom's family probably would have felt extremely embarrassed not to have a hot meal for guests.

RichardHeed · 26/04/2023 20:29

NotOnMyChristianiMinecraftServer · 26/04/2023 20:07

I imagine it would not have been so terrible had she asked the bride and grooms permission. The fact that she kept it secret is proof that she knew she was doing something wrong.

Show quote history

Tbh I feel like the DJ is at fault too here. He should have checked in with the bride or groom before doing a big “announcement” that wasn’t part of the wedding.

NotOnMyChristianiMinecraftServer · 26/04/2023 20:34

RichardHeed · 26/04/2023 20:29

Tbh I feel like the DJ is at fault too here. He should have checked in with the bride or groom before doing a big “announcement” that wasn’t part of the wedding.

Show quote history

That is very true. The DJ made a very poor decision.

Red0 · 26/04/2023 20:38

Same here. Didn’t speak to me all day in fact. Who knows why. And she’s got a face like a slapped arse on all the pictures.

Shirls2 · 26/04/2023 20:40

Frankola · 26/04/2023 20:02

My SIL wore a WHITE TULLE skirted dress!

My MIL brought a picnic and they kept it in the car. After the wedding, whilst photos were being taken and canapés and champagne were being handed out for guests she went to the car and got out a tonne of sandwiches wrapped in tin foil...DHs family then sat there scoffing them. As well as helping themselves to the canapés too. When DH mentioned it to them and asked why they brought food when canapés were provided and the wedding breakfast was being served just 60 mins after the service she simply said "we didn't want to be hungry" 😡

SIL gets married in a year. Yes i will be getting my own back. I don't care if its petty 😂

Ah Frankola, I had a (gluttonous) CF in-law who said she was going to bring snacks to my wedding. Like you, we had far more food than the main meal and food was a massive chunk of our budget as it was so important to us that our guests really enjoyed the food and were full as we are both greedy and love nice food. She is getting married next year and let’s just say I will be like Gordon Ramsey judging the food… 😁😉 It’ll be a dry wedding (not religious/alcoholism reasons but for costs) and imagine I announced I’d be taking a hip flask…

Red0 · 26/04/2023 20:40

Blondey2023 · 26/04/2023 09:19

Thats so pathetic of your MIL! You should definitely bring it up with her and hold her accountable.

My story isn't really a CF one as such, but my MIL has never warmed to me and even on our wedding day upon seeing me in my dress, not once did she tell me I looked nice/give me any positive words, NOTHING. She didn't congratulate us after the ceremony. She took loads of pics at the wedding, of which I'm in NONE OF THEM! Grrrr!

Same here. Didn’t speak to me all day in fact. Who knows why. And she’s got a face like a slapped arse on all the pictures.