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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed at some pathetic woman in the supermarket

106 replies

jimbobsmum · 16/02/2008 00:30

I was in the supermarket this morning with my ds (22 months). He was sat in shopping trolley 'reading' a picture book of farm animals. As we went around he was signing animals he knew and grunting animal noises. He enjoys watching something special(cbeebies) and has picked up lots of signs on his own - I don't teach him. One excuse for a human being tapped me on the shoulder and with a disgusted look on her face and disgusted manner in her voice asked if he was deaf. I wanted to slap her across her face and tell her to mind her own f'in business. I didn't of course but I know already I wasn't being unreasonable for wanting to I just need to rant so that I can sleep.

OP posts:
Original poster
jimbobsmum · 16/02/2008 17:06

Morningpaper i guess you are right i will try and respect all different types of adults and will caryy on trying to teach my ds to respect everyone around him. it's nice to be nice eh!

needmorecoffe I don't think the show refers to disabled people as 'special' the show is called 'something special' maybe it's because they are always out and about at the seaside, school, farm etc or may be now you've sat nicely watching all the other stuff on cbeebies we're going to show you something special!! btw we are all special.lol

That's the end of my rant now and I have forgiven her (trying to respect her) and moved on

OP posts:
lottiejenkins · 16/02/2008 17:07

Cheshire Badges
They have wonderful badges
I'm not naughty Im Autistic (is one)
No ask me Not my Companion
Im deaf not daft
im deaf not stupid!
All really good
www.cheshirebadges.com/

BeMyV · 16/02/2008 17:20

Glad your mate doesn't shop in my supermarket! Gawd knows what she'd make of us.
Ds(13) a very proficient signer since the age of 3 but can hear a crisp packet rustle from 500 yards, just had to learn to sign at his school. However well he may hear he'll never be on the catwalk in Milan due to his cerebral palsy.
Dd(6) her signing is fair to middling. Most of it learned from older brother's mates and also from Justin. No physical difficulties, just a spoilt brat.
I expect dd would have told her, in sign language, to bog off and stop being nosey.

needmorecoffee · 16/02/2008 17:24

what do you mean 'not on the catwalk cos of CP'?
I'm planning dd to be the first CP super-model. After all, poeple keep saying 'leats she is pretty' or 'well, she has nice hair'

And the OT did say that it isn't worth children like her getting GCSE's....

Unfitmother · 16/02/2008 17:41

Thanks for the badges link Lottie. I think the 'Please face me' one could be useful for me at work.
The 'deaf not daft' is tempting but best not

ibelieveindreaming · 16/02/2008 18:44

I wouldn't really find it offensive.

Desiderata · 16/02/2008 18:50

I didn't say that though, did I nmc. Seeing as she's a ginger an' all

BeMyV · 16/02/2008 18:55

No, NMC, he will not be on the catwalk.
I intend for him to get a job that has accommodation with it - No 10 you reckon?!?
My ds is extremely good looking (dunno where that came from, his parents look like George and Mildred), he is very intelligent and gets good grades, he is well-liked by adults and children, loves animals, 70s music, is addicted to YouTube, is developing a rare insight into politics, but walking is not one of his strengths. Neither is doing things with his left hand.
Oh, and just to stay on topic, he signs very well having had classes in it since nursery at his SN school.

cocolepew · 16/02/2008 19:27

People, always women btw, are always telling me or dd1 that "she's very small isn't she? Usually said in a very loud voice. A woman did it the other day, first to me, then to dd in a verrrry slow voice . DD is now 10 years and said "yes i am, but you're overweight, but I thought it polite not too yell it all over the shop".

3andnomore · 16/02/2008 19:38

oh coc...your dd sounds ace and gutsy

3andnomore · 16/02/2008 19:39

erm, coco even

DualCycloneCod · 16/02/2008 19:41

why is it so terribel to ask - maybe she had osmthign NICE to say

DualCycloneCod · 16/02/2008 19:42

most mners say " oh god if only they ahd asked " or " no oen takes ain interest"

maybe SHe had a deafkid

cocolepew · 16/02/2008 19:45

I think she's just tired of people pointing out the obvious, . Her speech has never been good and I remember, a few years ago, her wondering what was wrong with peoples hearing that day, and were there "a lot of deaf people." She wasn't being cheeky, she genuinely thought that there was something wrong with everyone else!

wannaBe · 16/02/2008 20:05

does the thought of having a disabled child disgust you? Only i find it odd that you would A think it would disgust someone else and B be offended by the inference that your child was deaf.

Some people do ask out of nosyness - I remember when I was about 11/12 me and my sister went into a shop and for some reason this woman came over and started chatting to us, and she then said to my sister, "is she" then whispered very quietyly "blind?" and then said out loud "your sister?". My sister replied yes and I then said "but I'm not deaf though!". (yes, was always a gobby cow ).

Washersaurus · 16/02/2008 20:10

When on holiday in Florida, DS1 who was then 12mo fell over and had a big round graze on his forehead. A few days later an old lady stopped as we went into a supermarket and shouted across the store (in New York accent) "OMG is THAT a birthmark?, here come look at THIS birthmark"

If it had have been a birthmark I think I would have been in tears.

I think some people just try to be friendly by saying something and are too stupid to realise that they are offensive

RubyRioja · 16/02/2008 20:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

needmorecoffee · 16/02/2008 20:14

BeMyV - my dd can't move at all. No walking or sitting or hand function. Should make a great super-model.
She's can't speak so maybe not no 10 but we'll come visit you and your ds for a nose around
And we all know Desi is ginger-ist. She hasn't replied on the meet-up thread for dd's birthday
Why didn't you just tell the woman that no, he wasn't deaf Jimbob? Wanting to slap her is a tiddly bit over-reacting. I just sigh when people approach me about dd.
Why is she in a wheelchair?
Can she hear?
Can she understand?
What a shame
Oh, we used to put 'kids like that' in a home you know
aren't you brave
etc etc
and my favourite....'whats wrong with her?'
To which the answer is 'nothing, why?' and watch them boggle

PussinJimmyChoos · 16/02/2008 20:19

I'm at the 'oh at least he's not one of them' comment...I'm 'one of them' ie deaf and attitudes like that make me ...still, on the positive side, if people are slagging my disability, I don't hear it so....

Desiderata · 16/02/2008 20:28

Although , I'm still struggling to believe that somebody would say that ..

Desiderata · 16/02/2008 20:29
needmorecoffee · 16/02/2008 20:32

Is that a BSL sign Desi....

PussinJimmyChoos · 16/02/2008 20:33

You can drive over now you have a car!

Desiderata · 16/02/2008 20:34

Yeah, whatever

needmorecoffee · 16/02/2008 20:35

I can indeedy Pussinjimmychoos. Still haven't grasped I have one yet and keep forgetting it.

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