Am I the villain here?

[GilChesterton]

I work for a regional branch of a large company. During the pandemic I was promoted to manager of our branch, and then promoted a junior member of our team into the role I had just vacated. We worked from home all through the pandemic and various lockdowns, and only in the middle of last year did we start to look at moving to return to the office.

I have instructed our team that they can continue to work from home some of the time, but have to have a minimum amount of time in person in the office. This one member of staff is refusing to return to our office, and during one of the lockdowns actually relocated to be nearer his family, and is not in commutable distance of our office.

Our jobs can technically be done wholly remote, but I feel we lose a lot of team working, accountability and quality if we are not meeting in person regularly, and providing a proper service to our clients does mean being available in person.

I have issued an ultimatum to this team member, saying they either have to follow the guidance or find another job. I am now being accused of ruining his life.

Given the job can be done remote I have begun to doubt myself. AIBU?

He was not bonkers, he was arrogant and entitled to think that his employer would accommodate him without checking first

As were many employees. TBH, I would sack him with that attitude

It's odd that the company watched whilst he put his home on the market and moved....but said nothing.

What a stupid statement - how do you know the cmpany watched him moved? Did he announce it on FB or MN? he may have moved without daying anything. And even if he did inform them he was moving, what were they supposed to day? 'Oh Fred, have you condisidered that moving to Outer Mongolia may affect you ability to come into the office and meet the clients you are paid to meet?'

Would you have done that?

It is laughable that some posters think the OP has ruined his life

He moved location while his contracted place of work did not. That’s his tough shit to deal with

We were very clear during lockdown that the office is still the main place to work and as soon as restrictions were over there would be an expectation to come in. A few people did move during that time and grumbled when the inevitable come back to the office messages started. But there was little sympathy as they knew the score . Now it’s hybrid and they manage it. Those that live very far away know they have to pay for their own travel and accommodation but that’s on them for moving hundreds of miles away

He should never have moved and at least should have spoken to his employers first to discuss. Plenty of people live away from their workplace and stay over 1/2 nights a week if they don't want to live near their place or work so this could be an option.

If you allow him to permanently work from
Home it sets a precedent and will not go down well with other members of the team

Part of the trouble is that the benefits of wfh to the employee are very clearly defined- no commute time of cost, versus being in the office which are harder to quantify- more team spirit, easier to talk things through, less formal meetings.

Personally I think it's down to companies to take a reasonably hard line on this. Ironically in our place because of hot desking, they would be in a pretty pickle if everyone who is meant to turn up does, so they haven't gone down that route.

The employee is a CF.

They decided to move away!!!!

And as a manager you've got to be seen to make a stand otherwise the rest of the team will not respect you and will take advantage!

I've been in that situation myself in the early days of being a manager.

I had to toughen up!

If they are not available at short notice then we can offer less of a service to our clients, who are more and more expecting us to return to an in person service. If someone else then has to cover it places a burden on the rest of the team (or our clients go elsewhere)

Surely this is all that needs to be said on the matter? He is asking you to increase the burden on his colleagues or risk losing business because he made a decision to move out of the area. That is not a reasonable request, and you will lose the respect of your entire team if you back down and give him what he wants.

He can always get another job. One closer to where he lives. This guy is a cf. expecting that he can work as he likes and move miles away. If he emigrated can he still work for you? Err no. He needs to move on. You are right OP.