To think the way you look in photos...

[Fillyfrog]

Is the way you look to everyone in real life?

I recently learnt in therapy that what you see in the mirror isn't what other people see, at all. They see a reverse image, so they see you as what you look like in photographs.

Been reading this article and it seems to confirm it. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.huffpost.com/entry/selfies-vs-the-mirror-face_n_5a4faf77e4b01e1a4b14cdf9/amp

I know it sounds stupid but I can't stop thinking about it. What if you always look awful in photos?! I can't work out if I'm understanding it wrong and could do with some other opinions 🙈

It also hadn’t occurred to me until a few years ago. My dd recently wrote in her French class that her mum is ‘belle’ so my reverse image must be better than my mirror image lol! I think a lot of us are our worst critics.

My DH looks completely different in the mirror to how he looks in reality - it actually freaks me out to see his reflection, it doesn't look like him at all.

I'm like chandler bing in photos I ruin each one of them I hqve cried before knowing these qre the memories my child will have of me

You needed therapy to figure this out?

I'm glad it's not just me. I know there's been a few sarcastic comments but for some reason it didn't occur to me. It's taken me years to accept (and sometimes like) what I look like in the mirror. I sometimes look at myself now and think oh, not bad today. Etc. So now to realise that everyone else is seeing what photo images look like has really upset me and I know that sounds absolutely ridiculous. Because photos I look so disgusting, that to learn there what people see, is very bad. I was hoping I'd just understood it wrong. I think Now I get why I'm treated the way I am sometimes.

The camera don’t lie.

I think some people are just not photogenic. The best looking man I ever met (and I was far from alone in thinking that) looked no where near as hot in photos.

I don't think I'd ever leave the house if I saw in the mirror how awful I look in most photos! 😂

Photogenic people don't always look great in real life and attractive people don't always photograph well.

Regarding the upside down stuff, no. The lens in your eye flips the image and your brain corrects it. The world isn't upside down, just the image at the back of your eye.

It's best to use two mirrors and then you see yourself correctly, how others see you.

I was taking a picture of my daughter asleep the other night. Looking at her she looked like the most perfect Angel cherub with pouty lips and a perfect and a serene face. But the picture just didn’t look the same. Even looking at her on the screen before I snapped and moving to the side and looking at her she looked different. Everyone looks better in real life.
It’s also the reason why most models are not necessarily the people you would people find the most beautiful in real life. They are faces that work with the camera, generally lots of angles.

How does your brain know what we are viewing is upside down ? Ie how does it know what way it should be ?

Photos are a lying snapshot.
Ever seen bad photos of celebrities who are otherwise considered beautiful? I have. There was a post on Instagram a while back that showed images of the Kardashians - the typical red carpet images where they look stunning, alongside images where they’ve been caught off guard. They look so perfect in most photos that they know are being taken, because they’ve learned their best angles, how the light best catches their most flattering angle etc and work that to their advantage. You can’t pose perfectly when a camera is catching you off angle just walking down the street. And most of us average Joes and Janes don’t know our most flattering angles/lighting because we aren’t photographed 24/7 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm also hoping not as I don't photograph well lol

I think people are either photogenic or not.
Ds is gorgeous, other people comment all the time!
I try to take a nice pic of him and he looks awful!

This is why directors do screen tests and photo tests. To see how models and actors actually look on camera.

Start a zoom call to yourself and then flip the mirror setting (in video settings) back and forth, it's very strange! I'm not too asymmetrical (apart from my parting) but eyes subtly different set enough for it to be unsettling for me to see myself the way others do!

Can work in reverse too - people can have a quality in the flesh that the camera simply does not capture.

I think (only sometimes) that I'm better looking than I am. And then I see a photo of myself and it brings me right back down to earth. I'm not good looking at all🥴

Some faces don't work on camera. I'm reasonably attractive IRL but look an absolute donkey in photos. When I was younger, event photographers always wanted to get a picture of me but then I'd see them visibly cringe when they pulled their heads back to look at the photo. Hey ho, first world problems and all that.

A photo is not exactly how you appear to others, no, but I agree that it’s a lot closer than we might like to think. We’ve all experienced a friend saying “oh no that’s a terrible picture of me” and thinking “um, that’s what you look like”. Likewise when people complain about how awful their recorded voice sounds- it almost always sounds exactly like they normally sound.

That said, a photo is a still image so misses a lot about how a person appears to the world. And how we perceive photos of ourselves (focusing on the negative) may be a long way from how other people perceive them.

What a thread, so interesting!

I’ve often mulled over why I’ve often been told how photogenic I am and came up with the conclusion that I must look better in photos than real life !

It also never occurred to me about what you see when you look in the mirror. Going to get DH in front of the mirror this morning and see what the difference is 🙃

A mirror image is different from a photographic image- fact.

But you can't conclude from that that every photographic image of you is a true representation of how you look to others.

Have you never seen an unflattering or unrepresentative photo of anyone else?

We don't see people as fixed images we see them as animated, expressive, moving, 3d realities. Some are more photogenic than others possibly but the fact that photography is a highly skilled profession, it is clear that it can be used to enhance or detract from the reality.

It's because you're used to the image you see in a mirror, you've grown up with it.
Everyone else is used to the real life you, which is what is captured in photos.
No-one's face is completely symmetrical so when you see it reversed it looks odd. Try reversing a photo of someone else so you see what they see in a mirror!

The camera definitely does lie. It’s just a snapshot, lighting, the lens, the screen you see it on etc all impact how the image looks. Some people are much more photogenic than others due to their bone structure, confidence and symmetry. So basically, don’t worry too much about it! One one camera you might look like Shrek, on another you may look beautiful.