To think other children's snacks are irresponsible?

[cowgirljoey]

The official policy at DS's school (Year 2) is for them to bring a fruit or veg snack from home for break time. This seemed to be what happened when DS was in reception and Year 1, but over time DS tells me that his friends are regularly bringing crisps, chocolate bars and sweets in for their snack(s) and that he is one of the only ones who has fruit/veg each time.

Totally get that this needs fact-checking (I have a few reasons to think is is accurate), but if it is AIBU to think this is something I should contact school about? I don't think it's fair on the kids to be having junk food as a snack, and I've observed myself that lots of them eat barely any of their school lunch, suggesting that they aren't v. hungry at this point (understandable if they've had choc/crisps an hour beforehand). I think that parent are being irresponsible to be giving chocolate as a daily morning snack, but as I have no control over this, AIBU to think that school should be enforcing the fruit/veg policy?

Bananas are currently 27p EACH in our local shop.

And the queues for the cheap food reuse scheme go round the block. You do get a carrier bag of fruit per week, some sort of bread product, a milk product or substitute, and a bag of freezer stuff. No choice, but it's at least half the week's food for a family for £7.50

But the fruit bag often had mealy bruised apples and semi liquid bananas. My DD couldn't take those. Couldn't even eat them as fruit (ASD, restricted diet). I turned them into sugarless chocolate muffins using the fruit for sweetness (and I know I'm lucky to be able to) and ok'd that with school.

What else would she eat? Nothing from 8.35 til 3.15.

I think it’s a helpful lesson for your child that some of his peers are in different circumstances with different options available to them and that life isn’t fair and he still has to have fruit and vegetables even if his friends have something he’d prefer. I don’t think you should be complaining about what other children are eating.

I hope you're not poking fun, it is no laughing matter.

The fact that 80% think YABU makes me despair. Definitely teaches kids that it's fine not to follow the rules, and further fuels the obesity crisis. Poor kids, god forbid we try to promote healthy eating so they don't have multiple health issues growing up.

It is perfectly possible to recognise that there is an obesity crisis and that people should eat more healthily but still think the OP should mind her own business. Contacting the school will achieve what? Would you go up to someone eating crisps on the streets and lecture them about healthy eating? If not, how do you think individuals should 'promote healthy eating'? The OP quite rightly can't do anything about what the other kids eat.

cowgirljoey If the policy isn't a policy but merely a suggestion are you going to start sending him in with crisps and chocolate?

What other parents give their children for snacks has absolutely NOTHING to do with you. In other words, mind your own business.

You are not owe justification. No one has to justify their food choices to you.

Oh come on now, do you seriously believe that ALL the other DC have crisps and chocolate? You need to wise up because you've got years of this ahead of you.
ALL the other DC are allowed to stay up until 9pm
ALL the other DC get more pocket money
ALL the other DC have got Xboxes/phones/whatever
ALL the other DC have parents who let them do what they want
Whatever your parenting policies are, you can bet your bottom dollar that according to your DC, every single other child in the universe has parents who do the opposite!

Having said all that, is there really any harm in the odd bag of Walkers? I don't mean on a daily basis but maybe once a week or something? Do you remember being a child yourself? Did you ever think school was boooooooring? They all do at some point - something to cheer it up a little every now and then might not be such a bad idea.

Please I would like you to msg me personally , I want to help

I would stay in your own lane and take care of your own kids.

I think it's a privilege thing, too. Some kids come from homes where parents are too time-poor to make balanced meals, and can't introduce them to fruit and veg the way you have been able to with your kids.

And some families are reliant on food banks where it might be difficult for them to keep a steady supply of fresh produce.

These families might have tried giving their kids a banana or carrot sticks but have maybe found they always got chucked away or left in their schoolbag, so it ended up being less of a waste of money to just give them things they will actually eat.

It is frustrating when you feel like no one else is making an effort but trust that most parents wish they could give their kids more and feel bad when they can't provide it. Count your blessings and focus on yourself.

My point, assuming that’s aimed at me as I don’t see any other posts about uniforms, was pretty clear.

My DDs claim that everyone is allowed to go to the park (that I can see from the garden, as well as the school gate) before getting changed is as accurate as most of the other everyone else is allowed claims children make and likely as accurate as the Op’s DS’s insistence that everyone has chocolate and crisps instead of fruit…

Whatever your parenting policies are, you can bet your bottom dollar that according to your DC, every single other child in the universe has parents who do the opposite!

Its funny isn’t it how it’s never that everyone else has an earlier curfew / less screen time / less pocket money… 😅

I understand your good intentions but you alone sending a complaint is not going to magically provide easy to eat fruit and veg for these kids and turn back the tide of the country's health crisis.

All you can do is feed your own kids well and donate good healthy food where you can.

Yes, exactly so

Not your child, not your concern. 🤷‍♀️

If the school have a rule, then they should enforce it otherwise no point in having the rule in the first place. I got told off for a fruit bar once instead of fresh fruit so our school do enforce it 😅

But I dont think you should judge the parents giving them that-mine have a little bit of chocolate/biscuits every day and are fit, healthy, perfect weight (probably described as skinny to look at) and eat a totally balanced diet. A small treat every day if they are fit and active kids is fine.

I would just mention to the school that you would rather them enforce the rule if its there.

Love this!

I don’t think it’s so important for children to snack that you give them unhealthy stuff just to make sure they eat it, but that’s just personal opinion. My DS is king of sheer bloody stubbornness and I’d never get anywhere if I didn’t stick to my guns for months on ends. He also has a kidney issue that means he has low sugar, low salt, so we have to be hotter on it than most. When he didn’t want fruit at break, we just said he didn’t have to have it but didn’t replace it. He can ask for it again if he wants (he’s a good fruit eater bar bananas but didn’t like having to waste break sitting still as it took him longer to eat than the others). I feel like a lot of parents worry a lot over children eating enough when most eat plenty, but I’m sure I’m guilty of similar with other issues too. I think if they don’t want the healthy snack that is the child’s choice, really, they won’t starve. Obviously, exceptions to this include children who have autism or other issues and genuinely will not eat more than a few safe foods. I wouldn’t phone the school, but I do think it’s a good time to chat around our own choices and why we choose to do it this way as pp have said.

Hear hear!
And if the parents aren’t willing to follow health guidelines and school policies, what chance have the children got?!
And it’s true like OP says, that those children who are eating healthily and whose parents are following guidelines, feel they are getting short changed… hopefully they will appreciate it in the long run though.

Oh my God🤣 how about you can teach your DC to not worry about other people and just concentrate on himself?.. sounds like you need a lesson or two in that as well.

There is no way that OP's DC is the only Yr2 with fruit and veg as snacks. He's obviously trying to convince OP he needs crisps and sweets

My DS says the same. I send him in with fruit and don't give a shiny shit what other people do. Instead of policing what other people do, use it as an opportunity to explain that just because other people are breaking the rules doesn't mean everyone should. My DS mention it now

Keep your neb out of other parent's choices, it's none of your bloody business

I don’t think it’s any of your concern what other children are eating. It’s rather judgemental as well, parents know kids are meant to have fruit but it’s a balanced diet, most kids have crisps in their lunchbox, shock horror along with fruit and a sandwich. My children do and they are perfect healthy , they have lots of sports afterschool , walk to and from school and burn off plenty energy. Schools also can not police every childs lunchbox they have hundreds of kids in a lunch hall over the lunch hour and there are only a few staff. There are much more important safeguarding issues for schools to worry about that someone eating a bloody packet of crisp.

The teachers need to confiscate all the irresponsible snacks and then consume them dutifully in the staffroom to avoid waste.
And DS needs to be sent in with a tureen of cabbage soup to feed those poor unfortunates with lax mothers.

It's none of your business what other children have. My son had a bloody good reason why he had to have a carbohydrate based snack every day and it was no other parent's business.

Even those who may not have a reason you feel is valid may not be in the position to afford fruit everyday, or indeed any day.