Should nanny tidy up toys before going home

[treeliver]

And in general during the day ? I had a nanny before and she kind of automatically did this...

However she did only look after 1 child. New nanny is looking after my two.

But I felt a bit miffed when I had welcomed her in this morning to quite a tidy house and obviously it got completely trashed and she just left, without lifting a finger.

I get that it gets messy, but the last 30 minutes she was just chatting to me anyway, whilst the older one was watching cartoons and younger one was just hanging out.

I don't know if she would have tried to tidy up, had I not come in and had a chat with her. Does it send mixed signals ?

She hasn't really tidied up much otherwise either to be honest. But I noticed it more today because I left the house especially tidy this morning for her.

Also, random question, but emptying the bin is not part of what the nanny should do right ? Previous one used to do it, if I hadn't got to it on the odd occasion ( maybe 3 times in a year ) she also used to occasionally hoover up after the my son, if he'd made a mess on the floor with play doh. Current nanny just leaves the play doh on the floor ( well she did today ) and didn't tell older child to tidy it away and close the pots. So basically the house was trashed and play doh everywhere.

I feel a bit miffed but perhaps it was caused by me being there for the last 30 minutes ? We were just catching up on the day and I started prepping dinner.

I'm not sure if it's me or her and how to say it to her in a nice way.

Of course the nanny should tidy as she goes. Just the mess she has made with the kids. I wouldn't get too hung up on how you approach this. Just ask outright and do it soon. Bins and stuff is not her job but what I'd say is if the bin is full empty it, don't just stack rubbish next to it. You will always try and empty it but if it's full on occasion then she should empty it. Ditto dishwasher being full /clean. Not always but occasionally. Expect her to treat the house like her own (but not routinely clean for you).

She needs to clean up after herself and the children. Explain what you want it to be like and ask if she’s happy to do that. If not find someone that will.

"Right, whilst I get dinner started, can you make a start on tidying up with Johnny please?"

I'm not a nanny but if I was watching my nephews for a few hours I would definitely tidy up. I think it's a bit cheeky of her to let the kids trash the place and leave it for you to come home to. I would maybe politely say to her in a jokey way to not let the kids play with something until the previous toy/ game has been tidy

I was a nanny. I always made sure the house was tidy before the end of the day. I planned meal times based on being able to clean kitchen before mum came home.

This doesn’t work. You’re not asking a favour, they’re getting paid for it. I wouldn’t leave my workplace a shithole.
We've had lots of nannies over the years, and I’ve thing I’ve learnt is to be direct.

Do you have a formal contract outlining her duties? (You should …)

Our nanny (for two children) cleans and tidies all the downstairs communal areas (two living rooms, play room, kitchen), and children’s areas (bedrooms, children’s bathroom). She doesn’t do the bins but she cleans the kitchen and floors, does the shopping, some errands like post office and dry cleaners.

Housekeeping and nannying can be separate jobs. You won’t always find an amazing nanny is the best housekeeper and vice versa. For an amazing nanny when the kids are this little, I’d let housekeeping tasks slide a bit, as long as I could see they were generally conscientious of the home and gave things their best effort. However, doesn’t sound like your nanny is doing this whatsoever - I’d have an easygoing chat in the first instance and if you’re not getting anywhere, look for a new nanny.

For example our nanny left last night and the play room was a complete tip. She had, however, cleaned and tidied the kitchen, living room and bedrooms, taken them out to pick up new school shoes, and bathed them, and then told me she’d sort the play room the next morning. I think this was reasonable.

I even tidied up another school mum’s house when we were round for a play date and my son made a mess with the toys 😂

Nobody is saying the children should be left with no toys out at all, or that they shouldn't be allowed to play in case they make a mess.

However, there's a massive difference between leaving out a train set which was the last toy they were playing with before they started watching TV and leaving out the train set, a pile of Lego, the car track and associated cars, pencils and colouring books all over the table, playdoh all over the floor, books strewn around the room and the dolls house is empty because all the furniture has been dumped out on the floor.

The former is perfectly acceptable and I would have no issue with a nanny leaving the current toy out for them to continue playing with after dinner but the latter is unacceptable - firstly because they're leaving all the tidying up for the parent to do and secondly because I have always preferred to clean as I go, so if DD was playing then we'd have a maximum of two activities out at once and if she wanted to do something new she had to help me tidy away something she wasn't playing with any more.

I went for an interview for a nanny position once when I was in my early twenties. It was an absolute pisstake. She wanted all kid related stuff done plus 'light' housework, which turned out to be bins, cooking, the lot. All this for just below minimum wage. I was naive but not that naive! I decided I didn't want to be an underpaid skivvy. I think it's reasonable to expect the nanny to tidy up the toys but some of the other expectations on this thread are ridiculous.

its not about the kids sitting and doing nothing waiting for mum. It’s about teaching them how to manage their environment both by helping and by example. The children should be helping put the house to rights and then having telly or whatever

One of them is a baby! The other is very young too.

We’ve employed nannies for 15 years. They’ve all been really good, some have been exceptional. But none of them have left a mess behind before they leave. The odd thing, maybe, but not as an everyday thing. I think you should raise this now as otherwise it will really jiggle at you and you will become resentful and it will really impact on your relationship with your nanny.

What does your contract say in relation to the job description? Is is something like ‘caring for x and y between an and b hours on days d, e and f’ or is it more specific like listing examples of what that care would involve?

If it is more general, and if things remain the same as they are once you’ve had a chat and made your feelings known, maybe you could consider adding an appendix to the contract with a job description that includes the tasks that you feel should be obvious but aren’t being done (and those which are being done, for completeness). You’d both need to agree that this becomes part of the contract.

Do you think she isn’t seeing the mess? A very basic checklist for the end of the day might help. I know it shouldn’t be necessary, but maybe it would help you both.

I appreciate that these conversations are hard to have, but I’ve had to have hard conversations in my workplace too. Sometimes they’re needed and things improve afterwards.

In fairness, most nannies are paid a lot more than NMW.

If old enough for school shoes then old enough to tidy up their own mess

So imo school age can start tidying while nanny or mummy does tea

They do tidy their own mess but not all of it. They are four years old.

I was responding to the pp who seemed to think tidying up at the end of the day was unusual. Of course the baby can’t tidy away toys but a 4 year old can. Most toddlers help.