Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Jeremy Vine - people are morally obliged to downsize and free up property

668 replies

JoanThursday1972 · 14/04/2023 12:17

Currently have this on the radio. Suggestion is that people are not entitled to remain in and live in the house that they have bought and paid for. That they should downsize and free this up for more deserving occupants, ie families.

This is surely a personal choice and not an obligation? Anyone is entitled to live in a house they have bought, regardless of size.

OP posts:
JenniferBooth · 17/04/2023 18:47

@WishIwasElsa Im in a one bedroom social housing flat with DH so no good for a family anyway

Bunnycat101 · 17/04/2023 18:47

They don’t have any moral obligation but I do think there should be a bigger public policy discussion about whether we have the right housing stock. My parents are in a large house that will become unsuitable for their needs and too much work. They’d ideally want a bungalow as having a garden is important to them. They have no interest in a retirement apartment or something really small. The ideal would be a 3 bedroom bungalow with a garden but they are like hens teeth.

As it is, they won’t move and I can see the shit hitting the fan over the next decade when the house becomes completely unsuitable and it’s too late to move into the sort of housing that would support longer independent living.

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 17/04/2023 18:52

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 18:41

I guess im a boomer person (just about at61) - we don't own for all kinds of reasons - but I do think some of the attitudes on this thread suck slightly (from both sides of the argument) - it certainly isn't the case that every older person has slaved away for years to be able to afford a house, I myself got very annoyed in real life when someone I know kept talking about their house being through her hard work ( when she herself had never done more than 12 hours a week paid work after the age of 20 and that was with grown up children too ) - she was just fortunate that her H was reasonably well paid and that houses were much cheaper to buy relative to income at the point they bought. They had also inherited several times. There are also whole groups of older people who have been able to buy social housing at very modest cost that they have either kept or sold at a very good profit to give them a lift up and values have rocketed in many areas.

On the other hand there are also posters who seem to think they have a right to dictate that older people have served their purpose so a 'move out the way' attitude seems to have taken over.

Instead of turning on each other the whole system in the UK needs a damn good shake- we need to be providing far more good social housing of all kinds and not just for people on the bones of their arse, so that the young can save (if they want to buy) -so that people can leave dysfunctional relationships and aren't rushing into piss poor relationships just to have someone to share costs and so that older people can have choices.

This thread is enough to make you think about euthanasia! It is that depressing. Some on here don't seem to give a shit about how difficult it is to be younger and a modest earner, the lack of hope about having secure housing or the ability to have a family- and yet long hours, often no overtime payments, paying for further education, no pensions etc

-And some younger people here too , who don't seem to have any empathy about why older people don't want shoving out their homes into poorly built 1 and 2 bedroom blocks when they have a lifetimes worth of 'stuff' and memories in a place.

It's not individuals that are the problem- it's the housing model here that's a real issue , it's buy to let, it's right to buy, it's houses being used like cash machines , it's feeling you have to buy to have any protection. The politicians need to get a grip!

Its no good talking sense about what has caused this, no one will hear you!

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 19:17

@Socrateswasrightaboutvoting Yep you are probably right- but I feel better getting it out! Cheaper than therapy.

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 17/04/2023 19:22

Swiftbushome · 17/04/2023 17:55

@DannyZukosSmile no need to pity me. I have a perfectly nice life thanks. I have a decent size 2 bed house and 2 kids of the same sex who are happy to share the bedroom that me and DH are not in. But I know plenty of others of a similar age to me who aren't so lucky. A family who live in a 1 bed flat for example so the parents have to sleep on a sofa bed in the lounge. And im fairly sick of the attitude that a lot of older people have that they should just put up with it. And actually a lot of older people really haven't "earned" everything they have or get. A lot of them were just lucky to have been born at the right time.
But actually I'm not even suggesting that people should have to move. Just maybe they should be a bit more thoughtful. But I suppose that's too much to ask of a lot of people.

@Swiftbushome

@Swiftbushome You have received goady comments because of the goady thoughtful nature of your comments. Genuine thoughtfulness cuts both ways.

Swiftbushome · Yesterday 18:37
God this thread is so depressing. Of course people are under no obligation to move from their homes that they bought with their own money, but the attitude that they are horrified at even the thought of living with a bedroom plus a spare and a slightly smaller lounge plus maybe a smaller garden. And that they could not possibly entertain the indignity of living like that, but thinking it's totally fine for a couple and their 2 kids to live in the exact same property (but with twice the people) and that's totally fine, is something else.

Cue - Well don't have children if you don't have the space type comments. You can say you were surprised that that response.

Swiftbushome · Today 10:20
I'm not actually suggesting we withhold anyone's pension money if you read my post. Just pointing out what a ridiculous suggestion it is that young people should stop having kids if they don't want to live in overcrowded housing. Hope you're enjoying all your bedrooms you use to house your cat / your sewing machine / jigsaw puzzles.

Cue - I have a big garden and great schools and am not going to downsize comment.

If this was the tv show Pointless those would be 98/100 answers as to possible response to your statements. Focus on the the real perpetrator - the government!

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 17/04/2023 19:28

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 19:17

@Socrateswasrightaboutvoting Yep you are probably right- but I feel better getting it out! Cheaper than therapy.

I know. I get it I really do. A comment really touched a nerve earlier in the thread but I have calmed down now. The truth is that the government is getting away with murder and all most people seem to want to do is blame anyone other than the perpetrator. God help us come the next election!

Swiftbushome · 17/04/2023 19:51

@Socrateswasrightaboutvoting pretty much agree with everything you said upthread. Thank you for being the voice of reason.

Swiftbushome · 17/04/2023 19:51

Actually that was for @Crikeyalmighty 😆

WishIwasElsa · 17/04/2023 20:09

That's sort of what I was getting at, you would need to exchange or bid for a bigger place if you was going to have a family. Someone moving out of a home they own to a smaller place presumably wouldn't help you in that regard. If

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 20:21

@Swiftbushome - ah thank you!! I can feel the frustration with my 25 year old - lovely lad, clever, works hard, doesn't have a partner, shares with 1 other in London and even for shared ownership he's looking at needing to be on £47 k or so to hit the income criteria- he's on mid 30s which is good for his age but I know he feels everything is hard for just the basics- he likes living in London too.

EffortlessDesmond · 17/04/2023 21:38

The more of these threads I read, the more convinced I become that I don't want to stay in the UK once I retire. I don't like the housing options, and I think I want to cast my net a bit wider.

EffortlessDesmond · 17/04/2023 21:40

Of course, that will mean paying my inheritance tax elsewhere.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 17/04/2023 21:52

Swiftbushome You have received goady comments because of the goadythoughtful nature of your comments. Genuine thoughtfulness cuts both ways

Exactly.

I was late buying my house because I was in the exact same position as younger people on this thread (could not afford it) and I also bought mine alone. Minimal inheritance too - and that’s been and gone. It didn’t touch the sides of the mortgage at the time. I scrimped and saved and bought somewhere cheaper and smaller than what I really wanted but it has what I want in other ways. I’m now busy in my garden and making the house ‘mine’. No fucking way am I ‘downsizing’. The ageism on this thread has been incredible.

EffortlessDesmond · 17/04/2023 22:03

At 66, I am mid Boomer generation. I haven't inherited more than tokens because both of my parents are still alive, and I am estranged from the one who has money. The other owns a property because I was able to help with its purchase price 20+ years ago. We are sorting out the PILs estate as I write this, but the residue is not going to be life-changing. Everything we have has been bought with taxed earnings. Yes, we have been fortunate to surf the property wave. And we have spent hundreds/thousands of hours talking about investment decisions, so there's already a pension set up for DC that is outside our estate. We thought about these things in our thirties and forties.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 17/04/2023 22:05

I'd just like to remind the ageist younger adults on this thread that those lucky 'boomers' like me are the women who expected to get their pension at 60, weren't informed of changes to the pension age properly or at all, & had £50K taken off them by the government.

Any volunteers among you to give £50K to the government right now? You envy our lifestyle so much: have this bit of it too.

Seymour5 · 17/04/2023 23:18

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 20:21

@Swiftbushome - ah thank you!! I can feel the frustration with my 25 year old - lovely lad, clever, works hard, doesn't have a partner, shares with 1 other in London and even for shared ownership he's looking at needing to be on £47 k or so to hit the income criteria- he's on mid 30s which is good for his age but I know he feels everything is hard for just the basics- he likes living in London too.

My daughter worked in London for several years, sharing various flats and houses. After a spell working abroad, when she returned to the UK in her early thirties, she came to the north, where she could afford to buy a flat. She loved living in London, but wanted her own home.

Crikeyalmighty · 17/04/2023 23:32

@Seymour5 are you 'up north' -or other friends/family- that I think makes a difference. My sons reluctance I think would be knowing no one- he's more likely if anything to move back west , where we are and he still has friends too- still quite expensive though unless you are part of a couple both working full time

Seymour5 · 18/04/2023 08:42

@Crikeyalmighty we are, although she didn’t move to where we were. It was mainly the housing issue that determined her choice.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page