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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be cross, not sympathetic?

24 replies

myheartmyhead · 13/04/2023 04:53

DH is downstairs with an upset stomach.... but he is being so bloody noisy! Moaning, groaning, up and down to the bathroom... I've been awake since 3am listening to it!

I know I should have more sympathy, but honestly I'm just cross at being awake!!!

OP posts:
Wavinggoodbyetoo · 13/04/2023 04:56

Oh god, performance sickness ‘see how I suffer’ and make sure everyone suffers too.

Id be cross too

Thack · 13/04/2023 05:08

I bet he's fashioning the obligatory Dressing Gown of Doom too.

My sympathies to YOU Op!

Fandabedodgy · 13/04/2023 05:10

Vomiting is awful. I think you are being pretty mean.

And how does someone even do 'performance vomiting'.

Herbiebanannas · 13/04/2023 05:14

“Hi all

I was really I’ll last night with a stomach bug, and even though I would have liked the comfort of my bed I got up and went downstairs to try and avoid disturbing DH any more than necessary.

It turns out he posted on a male forum about how annoying I was because I was up and down to the bathroom and in pain and they piled in saying I was pathetic for being ill.

AIBU to think he is a total arse and actually he should have been checking in on me and bringing me water and let me have the bed?”

Can you imagine the comments 🙄

Fraaahnces · 13/04/2023 05:25

Much empathy… my DH has had influenza (a genuine one) for over a week. The guy hasn’t even had a cold since my DT’s were little and they’re 16 now. I know I shouldn’t complain, but…. ffs, the snotty tissues strewn all over the bed make me want to gag. (Yes, he cleans them up, but why won’t he put them in a fucking plastic bag like a normal person?). The sneeze/cough/groan makes me want to stab him. Then that is followed by him gargling/hoiking up great gobs of nuclear phlegm and spitting into the fucking SINK in our shared en-suite/kitchen. I have gone supernova about this several times and handed him bleach every time I have caught him in the act or found lung boogers. TOILET EVERY TIME. He is not an 80 year old respiratory patient in a sanitorium. I don’t want to hear, see or EVER smell that shit! Nothing is less sexy to a nurse than phlegm or toenails. NOTHING!!!! Has he completed his full course of antibiotics? No. Is he an intelligent, educated individual who knows why that’s important? Yes. If he dies, will I put “I told you so” on his gravestone? Absofuckinglutely. (Although I may be found responsible if he doesn’t stop with the phlegm.)

ZekeZeke · 13/04/2023 05:30

Maybe you sleep on the sofa, let him have the nice comfortable bed beside the bathroom as he is ill?

Vallmo47 · 13/04/2023 05:33

@Herbiebanannas yep.

DisquietintheRanks · 13/04/2023 05:36

Yeah you're being really unpleasant. Maybe it'll be your turn next and you you can show him how its done.

nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 05:38

Herbiebanannas · 13/04/2023 05:14

“Hi all

I was really I’ll last night with a stomach bug, and even though I would have liked the comfort of my bed I got up and went downstairs to try and avoid disturbing DH any more than necessary.

It turns out he posted on a male forum about how annoying I was because I was up and down to the bathroom and in pain and they piled in saying I was pathetic for being ill.

AIBU to think he is a total arse and actually he should have been checking in on me and bringing me water and let me have the bed?”

Can you imagine the comments 🙄

Exactly!

The dislike of all men goes too far on MN!

nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 05:39

DisquietintheRanks · 13/04/2023 05:36

Yeah you're being really unpleasant. Maybe it'll be your turn next and you you can show him how its done.

Well if OP gets it tonight, she can have to couch and run up and down to the bathroom?

QueenBee1234 · 13/04/2023 06:03

Bloody hell, the guy is ill and is sleeping on the couch.....and he's still to noisy for Lady Downton living it up in bed!
YABU, totally unreasonable.

BoneBrothByDayDonutByNight · 13/04/2023 06:08

Wow OP. You sound nice. 😂

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 13/04/2023 06:28

Oh come off it, if I'm sick in the night my DC wouldn't have a clue because I keep as quiet as I can. By the sounds of it OP's DH isn't making the least effort to keep the noise down. Performance Illness is absolutely what it is! Like a freaking toddler..

nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 06:30

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 13/04/2023 06:28

Oh come off it, if I'm sick in the night my DC wouldn't have a clue because I keep as quiet as I can. By the sounds of it OP's DH isn't making the least effort to keep the noise down. Performance Illness is absolutely what it is! Like a freaking toddler..

Well of course he must be, because a woman said he is......

MayThe4th · 13/04/2023 06:35

Well hopefully you’ll catch it and then I hope that when you do you go and sleep on the couch so that he at least gets some sleep.

Rosebel · 13/04/2023 06:36

Well I can't say much after I was so angry that DH spent my A/L being ill. However if he's actually sick and has given up his bed for you then you are being really mean. You must be an incredible light sleeper, perhaps you should buy some ear plugs
I assume if you get sick you will give up your bed and be sick silently. But

PortiasBiscuit · 13/04/2023 06:40

The current sickness bug is a really nasty one, I hope the poor sod feels better soon.

Original poster
myheartmyhead · 13/04/2023 06:41

Wow! So judgey

For context, we have a downstairs loo, so I wasn't 'making him run up and down stairs'

Also, he isn't working this week, I am.

And yes, I sleep really badly, and wake at evey little thing

I did of course call down to check on him, but I can't deal with vomit, so he told me to stay upstairs!

OP posts:
AdeIe · 13/04/2023 06:43

Wow! So judgey

The irony. Not liking the comments received after posting on the Internet how much she's judging her own husband for being too loud when he's ill.

nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 06:55

myheartmyhead · 13/04/2023 06:41

Wow! So judgey

For context, we have a downstairs loo, so I wasn't 'making him run up and down stairs'

Also, he isn't working this week, I am.

And yes, I sleep really badly, and wake at evey little thing

I did of course call down to check on him, but I can't deal with vomit, so he told me to stay upstairs!

You wanted everyone to agree with you?

And we're judge when we don't?

I hope your DH feels better soon and to stop being "angry"?

I hope he's equally angry if you get it.

nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 06:56

Should've said cross but angry

potatowhale · 13/04/2023 06:59

Why us he using the upstairs one? Is the downstairs one off the kitchen?

Original poster
myheartmyhead · 13/04/2023 07:01

potatowhale · 13/04/2023 06:59

Why us he using the upstairs one? Is the downstairs one off the kitchen?

He's not using the upstairs one..: apart to have a shower at 4am!

OP posts:
nomoredriving · 13/04/2023 07:02

potatowhale · 13/04/2023 06:59

Why us he using the upstairs one? Is the downstairs one off the kitchen?

I don't think he is, going my the second post! He just has the temerity to be getting off the sofa and vomit in the down stairs loo. Hence the "he's up and down".

Not sure what he is supposed to do?

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