Making a "healthy" meal plan is futile

[MooseBreath]

I'm trying to lose weight. Over my 20s and after having 2 kids, I am no longer a good weight and I am trying to fix that. It is entirely because my portion control is crap and I love crisps.

I'm trying to eat healthier with weight loss in mind, without letting my children see their mother struggling with food. I also want them to know that moderation is key. We walk the dog every day for 45 minutes and have frequent dance parties and play active games throughout the day.

I thought my plan was healthy, but when I add up calories, it just works out that I won't be losing any weight at all (1722cal). No crisps, no sweets, no baked goods. But I don't know what to cut out without losing the energy to care for my boys and dog!
Breakfast: Raisin granola in a cup of milk
Lunch: Scrambled eggs, baked beans, and avocado with a slice of toast
Snack: Carrots, cucumber, and celery with hummus
Dinner: Baked gnocchi casserole with bacon

I don't see how I can make this better without starving myself. AIBU that demonstrating moderation will never work while I'm trying to lose weight?

The only time I’ve successfully lost weight, I did it using the Fast 800 diet and fasting 16 hours a day. It seemed to be the fasting, more than the 800 calories allowed, as I definitely went over some days… I lost 20lb in just over a month

I absolutely agree.

Imagine demonising baked beans (full of fibre and protein) or avocado (full of healthy fats and fibre).

And carbs are FINE TO EAT on a diet (so OP I am absolutely with you - don’t cut them out. I’m similar and I need them too). Shocking, I know. Fasting? Totally unnecessary and makes no difference whatsoever if you aren’t in a calorie deficit.

“Eat half a sandwich” that’s disordered eating. Have a healthy sandwich on a protein bagel with a fuckton of salad instead.

The only sensible advice on this thread is to work out your TDEE which you’ve already done (as you need a deficit to lose weight) and to up the veggie intake (as it ups your fibre, which aids weight loss, and keeps you fuller).

Weight loss threads on MN do tend to bring out the clinically insane, though.

Hmm, so according to Google, the 2000 cals per day came about from being based on the average American diet at that time.

There you go then.

Baked beans are full of sugar, are they not? I eat tons of beans, but not baked beans. I find them way too sweet for me.

If people's TDEEs are really that low then you need to get more active. I'm 5'4 and weigh 13.5 stone and mine is 2300 a day. Work out twice a week and walk minimum 10k a day, so nothing out of the ordinary.
I appreciate if you're very short or a much lower weight it will be lower but increasing your TDEE through activity is really easy.

https://www.womenshealthmag.com/uk/food/weight-loss/a28241466/2000-calories-a-day/

A quick Google led me to Public Health England saying that 2000 calories is used to maintain weight for the average women based on studies.

Used to be right

Women used to be a lot more active

And the average woman was a bit taller than you ( possibly 5 4 I can't recall)

There is also a lot of stuff saying that 2000 figure isn't helping and for the uk population 1800 is better estimate

Except I have stated that I am active and have a physical job when not on maternity leave, and I currently spend all day running and dancing with my preschooler. And even if the number to maintain my weight is 1800, which is not backed by PHE, I am under that.

So continue to eat 2000 and gain weight then 🤷‍♀️

You can buy low sugar beans.

Technically fruit is also full of sugar, but that isn’t demonised 🤷‍♀️

I'm not bloody eating 2000 though -+which has no reason to make me gain weight as it's still a reduction of what I was having-- ! I explicitly stated that yesterday was 1722.

OP first thing to do is not to take any of the advice from Mumsnet. Y

Sure. But we don't know if OP is eating low sugar beans. I am just saying there are easy swaps to be made here and a lot of hidden sugars in the original diet posted.

Being 100 calories a day under your tdee will take you a month to lose a pound on average

( and playing with a toddler all day isn't as calories consuming as you might like)

Because it's not sugar as sugar and people need to get that into their heads. It's not that hard.
Re demonising fruit. Come on, it's on here all the time. And peas

Shes not eating under her TDEE, she's aiming to eat over it 🤔

It's hard to say if she is under or over

If she is a dance teacher she may well have good muscle development and if she is very active she could be under at 1700

When have I said I'm aiming to eat over that? Yesterday was 1722 before I had suggested adjustments like replacing granola with porridge, getting rid of the beans, and halving the gnocchi and pairing with salad. That is under 2000 and even under 1800. I am aiming for 1664 to lose weight at a sustainable rate, which I would be shocked if I didn't achieve with those adjustments.

Previous posters are right, the clinically insane have arrived.

At your height you might not be actually in calories deficit , that's the concern

Yes going too low is daft

But you need to really know as your target sounds high for someone so short

1666 is not a HIGH TDEE - what makes you say that it is?

I'm confused. You're aiming to eat 1664 to LOSE weight? So that's NOT your TDEE?
If 1664 is your amount to lose weight then what's wrong with your original meal plan? Take away the avocado and you'd come in bang on target!

A person who is inactive and female and 5 foot 2 aged about 30 would be 1600 calories maintenance

So for 1700 to be a deficit the OP would need to be moderate to very active which my days if dancing with toddler were not

Incorrect - it depends entirely on your starting weight. A woman of 9 stone will burn much less than a woman of 14 stone.

My friend calculated my TDEE and told me I needed to aim to eat 1662 to lose weight. I thought tht meant 1662 was my TDEE. Apologies if I got the acronym confused.

Exactly this. And to add there are more nuances such as those with higher muscle burn more calories.

Same applies with calories eaten - not all calories are equal as some food groups require energy to digest whereas things like sugar and refined carbs are immediately converted. So eating foods with more fibre leads us to feeling fuller and requiring fewer calories to satisfy us.

Although @MooseBreath, I wouldn’t rely on a MN forum for advice. There are a lot of strong opinions and disordered eating on MN in general