Would you or would you not ban someone who swore once and then immediately apologised?

[Changingggggggggggg]

Just that really ...

Strange situation - in a hotel - one price had been agreed, they wanted to charge a higher price, they wouldn't speak quietly and calmly about it, but shouted at the guest and said there was no point in listening to what she said.

After 15 or so minutes of this, the guest, in enormous frustration did say "For F... Sake, please lets..." and then realising what they'd said, immediately apologised. The guest was rather shocked by what they'd said, having not done this before. She did then pay the higher price.

When they tried to book the hotel again a couple of months later, they discovered they had been banned - was told they had been told this by multiple people, despite there having been no communication.

Is this a banning situation - or do you give someone the benefit of the doubt, given their immediate apologies and contriteness?

Hotel can decide who they want to trade with based on any reason they choose, discrimination excepted.

I quite clearly did not suggest that - the mention of a wig may have indicated it was not too be taken entirely seriously.

OP please wear a wig

Wear a wig 🤣🤣🤣🤣. Jesus Christ...

The booking was made by phone, with no following confirmation? It's a bit risky just from the regards of actually knowing you have the booking, on the right date, for the right amount of people/right room with no written confirmation, never mind pricing. They could have quoted you anything over the phone, you could have misheard the amount they said. I've never worked or booked anywhere that doesn't do that tbh.

If what you're describing is accurate then either they are deliberately trying to fleece students on this course, though they're pretty silly to think they'd get away with it because you know, people talk to each other, or they're very lacking in communication between themselves.

Doesn't mean you can swear at people though, and yes I do consider saying "FFS" in the way you describe swearing at someone.

That said though, I have had people at my desk who have booked themselves in online, not bothered to check their confirmation, turned up on the wrong day, with more people than they've booked for and then kick off at me because somehow that's all my/ the hotels fault they're getting what they booked instead of what they imagined 🤷🏼‍♀️.

But, as it's a business and not a public service, unless you are being discriminated against for a protected characteristic then they can refuse your business if they want to, for any reason, and they don't have to tell you why. You don't have the God given or even legal right to demand service from a business that doesn't want to give it to you, even though most people seem to think you do.

There's a difference in swearing at a situation and swearing at staff. Service staff know when you are being a dick about the situation or being a dick towards them. And funnily enough, plenty of us totally get why a customer would be pissed off at something happening and often are secretly agreeing with you. But you'd be surprised at how insulting people can get towards customer services people and they don't even realise they are doing it.

My guess is that somewhere in the 15 mins of "arguing" involved either personal comments to the manager or to the staff before it got escalated, or it involved shouting and the swearing was the nail in your coffin.

Not entirely true. Once a booking has been made and price agreed, the contract exists even if no payment is yet taken.

It sounds like OP booked over the phone though, so very hard to prove in that case.

Just so I'm clear - an op who cheerfully admits to arguing for 15 minutes and swearing and has steadfastly chosen to drip feed information while ignoring direct questions is definitely not giving a one sided version of events?

For absolute clarity, I don't believe the OP's version and from what they have admitted I would have removed them from the premises on the spot.

I work in a customer facing role. People are understandably upset or frustrated by the time they get to me. Most manage to behave reasonably. There are however still a lot who don't.

I am at work. I don't see why I should be shouted at, sworn at, argued with, ranted at, subjected to snide comments or accusations and in some cases worse.
It doesn't matter if it's just once. I am at work and usually what's being challenged is outside my control anyway.

So yes - I think a ban is fair and I only wish more organisations would support their staff.

(And how would you feel if it was you or your lovely teenage DD who was regularly sworn at? It's not on is it?)

In this day and age where staff are hard to retain, I can see why they banned you for arguing. I think it's the arguing and not the swearing. While it sounds unfair that some were allowed the quoted price, legally they can ban you for whatever reason.

You have to remember that the person that you're talking to is not the one who profits from the higher price nor do they write the policies or determine price. They can't argue back if customers are out of order and usually on not much more than minimum wage.

I wouldn’t want to subject my staff to anyone using foul language, no. Plenty of other ways to express displeasure.

I also think that the price that was quoted was probably just that - a quote - subject to change - and not a booking, (or it would have been secured with a payment).
It was done over the phone and the hotel had no guarantee the OP would turn up (unless payment was taken). When she did confirm the current price was charged,

It's a receptionist doing their job they have zero say on prices or how the hotel is run. Would you like it if you was at work and someone shouted at you for 15 minutes for something you have no say or control over. When people have an issue with a business they need to complain higher up, not abuse the minimum wage staff who are just following what their told to do

Did you actually argue for 15 mins (or more) ?

I imagine they banned you for your attitude not your swearing. Moral: don't be an arsehole.

OP- if you are banned, are you actually allowed onto the hotel site to take part in the course?

It would be a real pain to book another hotel, and turn up and find out they won't have you on the premises at all...

Swearing at reception staff is highly aggressive behaviour. Of course you'd be banned from the premises.

thanks - not banned from course during day but may end up not being able to go given its not easy to get to.

I think lots of people are suggesting things that didnt happen - I was shouted at for a long time, and I asked repeatedly to talk about it calmly and quietly - it was a very strange situation and yes, I did snap, very briefly (and apologised immediately) and I realise I should have done something else like walk away until they could talk quietly. Next time I will.

They were a manager not someone more junior - if they had been, I would have asked to speak to a manager.

I was shouted at for a long time, and I asked repeatedly to talk about it calmly and quietly
Sure.

Ultimately @Changingggggggggggg it is irrelevant really to your problem of where to stay for the course etc, deciding who was unreasonable or if they're 'fair' in banning you because there's really nothing you can do about being banned unless they decide to change their mind about it.
There's no governing body or anything that you can report them too - no one monitors customer service or hotel managers and receptionists or holds them to a set of professional standards, breaking which means concequences.
They may well have been complete arseholes with you and banned you unfairly, there's no recourse that you can take to make them change their mind unless they have broken a discrimination law.
If you just want to know what people think for yourself, then I don't think anyone can really give an unbiased view because we only have your account of what happened, some will automatically think that you're telling 100% the truth and be furious on your behalf because they'll think that you are a customer and therefore behaved impeccably at all times until one small indiscretion, which as a dissatisfied customer was totally justified, while others will feel there's more than meets the eye to this, because they've encountered many customers/guests/members of the public who embellish, bend the truth, leave important information out or outright lie to support their argument when complaining about something that they aren't justified in complaining about in the first place.

And tbh, it seems really odd that an educational service/company would use a hotel so disorganised that they don't even send a booking confirmation when there's been a specific rate agreed, for their students.

I worked as a hotel receptionist for three months and it was awful. We all got treated like we were the scum of the earth, both by guests and hotel staff! It sounds as though you made a complete scene there, I don't blame them for banning you.

maverickess - thank you - a really useful post. Much appreciated.

I need to let go now and recognise all that you say. ... especially that there is nothing I can do, that is just how it is.

Yes, was/is weird set up - but that is how it is.

No they don't.

Why don't you believe the OP's version of events? After all, we weren't there so all we have to go off is the OP's account.

I think the hotel has behaved very unprofessionally based on the information we have. I can't believe anyone is supporting a hotel that a) messed up recording a booking despite the customer calling to confirm the booking b) attempted to charge the potential customer more due to their cock-up and c) tolerated a manager shouting at the potential customer. It just seems to be coming from a place of "that can't possibly have happened", which is beyond weird. Of course this type of thing could happen.

I don't believe anyone would stand there being shouted at for 15 minutes, no.