Has anybody chosen not to 'settle down'

[Fruitandbarley1]

Most people I know seem to be dating in their 20s, then settled down at around 28-32. Countless people I know. I know biological clock plays a part, but there seems to be some sort of societal expectation that you have to get married at around this age, have 1-2 children then that's it then, that's the rest of your life, Fun's over, you need to be settled with this person and be a parent now, and you should own your own house by now.

I've heard some really awful comments about people like "No wonder she's single at 30." As if people don't choose to be single.
I have a gay male friend who's 39, he's single, no children and lives in a flat share, doesn't seem to be planning to 'settle down'
People have commented on how 'strange' it is.
I find it so narrow minded and that people can't think of other ways to live their life. There's also the ageism towards women and that they're 'past it' after 40 so should be looking for a partner prior to this.
Has anybody chosen not to do things this way and felt happier for it?

I hate the societal expectation despite me being the prime example, met at uni, bought a house, got married, pregnant with my third.

I have friends who have long term partners or husbands or are single in their 30s and completely happy without children.

They actually keep me normal at times by going away for weekends with me (despite me having kids), going for dinners, drinks etc. it reminds me of being truly myself, and not just mummy, so no - you do you and you do what makes you happy!

Xx

I find the term “settled down” annoying and insulting when applied to women being married and raising children. I think it is damaging banter to say things like “the fun is over” or “that’s it for the rest of your life.” I’m having the most fun with my DH and when the DC came along, it’s been non stop entertainment raising my DC. Child rearing is only some 25yrs of my life, not the rest of it. I’ll have more time than that being an empty nest silver haired pensioner going on adventures with my DH.

(I won’t be raising grandchildren though. If my DC have DC, they will have to go elsewhere for childcare.)

I was never raised with the your purpose in life is to be some man’s brood mare so not all of society or families do tell their daughters this. I was always pushed heavily to have a career and be independent. To not base my worth or happiness on a partner or having kids because it might not happen for me.

But it was something I wanted anyway and I am happier as a family woman than I would be single and/or childless. That’s me, I know not everyone wants the same out of life and do not judge anyone for living differently.