Announced pregnancy.... was told to terminate

[northeasrer]

I had a somewhat close friend who has been messaging me over the last few days over a love issue in his life.

I was a bit short in my responses (just giving smileys or whatever, not being rude) because I'm tired and had nothing else to add.... He bought this up and I responded I'm pregnant.

His response was basically to abort....

I'm really annoyed by this. I'm nearly 40, he's 26, he's a friend I meet travelling, so he's not close.

And people wonder why some men don't like women .......

Back to you OP - it's none of his business (unless he is indeed the father, which doesn't appear to be so) and I would be telling him that in no uncertain terms.

And you care why?

It really doesn’t matter what his motivation is.
Tell him it’s rude not to wish you luck with your pregnancy and continue as before.

Posters have told you to block him. So I'm not sure why you're continuing on posting. He is not a friend. You NEVER say to anyone to abort, especially when you know they want the baby. He is rude and thoughtless. He is not a friend. I could not stay friends with a nasty, insensitive, rude and hateful person. Gather your self respect and block him. It's as simple as that.

Have you been supporting him emotionally? Are you a maternal figure to him? It perhaps sounds as if he’s jealous of the attention the baby will bring.

Do you think he was joking? You say he mentioned you were short with him/grumpy. When he questioned why you said you were pregnant. He may have tongue in cheek meant if you're going to be like this for the next 9m abort?

He may have tongue in cheek meant if you're going to be like this for the next 9m abort?

If this is the case and this crass twat suggests to a so-called friend to get rid of their unborn child as a tongue-in-cheek flippant comment then I'd absolutely get shot of them instantly.

Tell him to f off and block him in that order!!

If language is a barrier perhaps he interpreted you being ‘tired’ as tired of the situation. If you have never discussed / mentioned it he might have taken it as not something you want. South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures are quite vocal about prayers for babies.

it is a bit of an odd response if there was genuinely no additional context here. I would just respond by saying we are very happy and will not be aborting the baby. And share your own shock at his response. If he remains unsupportive about it then you need to phase this friendship out.

I thought by the title that you announced your pregnancy to friends and family and then got news that it wasn't viable. I'm child free and don't care for babies all that muck but that's just awful.

I find at first your opening style of Mumsnet Thread, quite weird,
As that there was no context to it,
To make much sense,

Now you are drip feeding this mumsnet Thread,

My take on this

Would be doesn't matter how long (close you are to your " friend" ,

What he said as far as I can see, he has strayed into deal breaking friendship Territory ,
Big time,

How dare he tell you should Abort your unborn baby,

Why is he being intensively Blunt straight and Nasty, with his comments towards you,
In respective of your pregnancy,?

Makes me Wonder whether he is just Nasty Prick,

Or
is he one of those tell it As it is straight to your face,
But hyper senistive to Anybody who is the same way to them @northeasrer ?

I find individuals like your friend,
Really irritating, They annoy the heck out of me,
Is there more to your mumsnet Op, you are not telling us about then?

Have you got any Addiction to Alchol or drugs ect?

Have you got a risky /dodgy lifestyle ect currently, that totally flies totally in the face that what Normally be expected of a pregnant woman ? 😳

Is the father to be Nasty to you in any emotional/mentally or physically ect (sexually abusive)...?

I am very inclined to say you need to seriously consider this friendship and to fade it out,

At 40yrs age you are more than old enough, to know that having a pregnancy as older mother the potential risks that come with this,

Plus you are old enough to know what you are letting yourself in for as a Single parent mother comes with its obvious challenges aswell as joys,
(There's no point saying everything with Rose tinted glasses ,

As it be more of a shock to the system

Have you got enough emotional/practical support around you Op?

Family support ect

This so called friendship should mean Nothing whatever now,
Going forwards , !
@northeasrer

He sounds just like any other Needy childish immature man child who is probably 🙄 jealous of the fact you will no longer be there to pamper to his endless needs..

Ditch him
Do yourself a favour

Make better friends for yourself who are not Nasty towards you like so called friend

@MrsTerryPratchett is right, we as women have the right to continue or end a pregnancy that our bodies carry. Why would that be an issue for you? Surely it's a wonderful thing?

he's a friend I meet travelling, so he's not close

So you randomly told him you were pregnant, and he immediately told you to abort. How about you ignore his stupid comment, and block him ?His opinion means nothing to you since he is just a random travel friend. Block and move on.

Hi Op

Ah I see definitely what you're friend issue is,

It's to do with a cultral and Religious concerns,

If you are not Married ,

It's obviously 🙄 in his culture and assuming faith wise too,

It's obviously a massive Tabboo 🚫 Forbidden to be in a situation like yourself be in as you are,

It's obviously not his business, he is not even the father to be for heavens sake 🙄

I don't think it is actually. It seems a simple reply and it might be hard if you were once close but really it's the best option. You don't need "friends" like that.

Apart from the serious issue of an abortion being suggested, this thread is a bit weird!

Well obviously it’s none of his business what you do with your pregnancy (assuming you hadn’t directly asked for his advice on whether to abort). I think he sounds immature and attention seeking, and needs to be told straight that his behaviour isn’t appropriate here.

My mil said this to me when I was pregnant she was having an argument with her son at the time. We still spoke after but it’s nearly nine years ago now and I still hate her 4 intact recently I have cut contact with her. I could never forgive that after nine years. So I think your going to be wasting your time doing anything else but blocking this person.

This was my first thought as well.

He sounds immature. Just ignore.

Cultural differences - you're not married
Or maybe if here alone disappointed it means no chance of a formal relationship with you

I wouldn't give him any more of your time - arse!

I think a big part of this is possibly a language miscommunication.
In your 1.58 post you said:
.....I said "Sorry I'm pregnant and tired...."
Your non-native speaking friend may have understood that you are sorry that you are pregnant when you meant that being pregnant and tired you had been late replying for which you were sorry.

A narcissist wants you to centre him in your life, drop everything and be his emotional support when things aren't going well.

You reveal the shock news that he isn't your priority. He attacks young revenge.

Block. Ignore. He was never a friend.

Young- you in autoincorrect