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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Baby left in car

75 replies

callsocialservices · 07/04/2023 15:39

Faced a dilemma today I hadn’t previously had and wondered what others would do.
I was alone in the car with the baby (1 year) and was running low on petrol. Pulled in to fill up, then, to my horror, realised ‘pay at pump wasn’t working’.
Wasnt sure if it’s ok to leave baby, lock car and go pay (no queue) or take baby out of car and into the shop with me to pay.
Ended up leaving them. Asked my group of friends what they thought and got a varied response so wondered what others thought:
YABU - take baby with you, they is likely to die in the car that long alone.
YANBU - baby will be fine it’s only 2 mins

also would be curious to know if response would be different if the baby was asleep or not.

OP posts:
GaspingGekko · 07/04/2023 15:43

I've seen a lot of posters here saying it's safer to leave them in the car because of there being lots of cars moving around - risk of being hit I guess.
But I was always more worried about fire so always took mine in with me.

L3ThirtySeven · 07/04/2023 15:44

I think you are supposed to lock them in the car because it’s safer than taking them across the forecourt to pay.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/04/2023 15:44

If I can see the car at all times then I’d leave the baby.

MrsDoylesDoily · 07/04/2023 15:45

This thread has been done to death, dug up and hit over the head with a spade.

YABU - take baby with you, they is likely to die in the car that long alone.

That's just a silly option isn't it? ^^

FWIW I would've left the baby as there was no queue and presumably you could see them?

Coffeellama · 07/04/2023 15:45

This question always gets very split responses on mumsnet, I think you just have to make a judgement call. Queue or not clear vision at all times, take baby with you, no queue and a fast run in to pay leave baby behind.

worried4698643 · 07/04/2023 15:46

Always take baby with me.

Coffeellama · 07/04/2023 15:46

Personally I just used to get petrol at Asda because you put petrol in and then payment is drive though anyway, obviously only works if you have one near you though.

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 07/04/2023 15:47

Never take the baby with me. It only takes a couple of minutes to pay!

cannaecookrisotto · 07/04/2023 15:48

If there was no queue and I could see the car then I would leave them.

ZuliKyanLarsFoz · 07/04/2023 15:51

As long as I could see the car, then I locked them in the car and paid. We now have certain petrol stations that have apps you can pay on (Australia)...not sure if they have them in the UK but they are a great option if they do have them.

FlounderingFruitcake · 07/04/2023 15:59

YABU - take baby with you, they is likely to die in the car that long alone.
Dramatic much!! Personally I’d always take mine, when DD1 was a baby I lived abroad where car jackings were frequent occurrences so it’s engrained in me not to. I know the chances of that happening in the UK are slim to none though so if you leave baby chances are the worst that’ll happen is they wake up and cry. It’s your judgement call, doesn’t matter what others think/do.

FlowersAndBonnets · 07/04/2023 16:03

I would always take my baby, asleep or not. I think it’s neglectful not to.

DiscoBeat · 07/04/2023 16:05

I used to leave them if it was a stones throw and I could see them through the window whilst paying. Never left them anywhere otherwise.

Oakyloaky · 07/04/2023 16:06

Always left my children in car.

DiscoBeat · 07/04/2023 16:07

YABU - take baby with you, they is likely to die in the car that long alone.
They is not if you are gone two minutes, they are under cover from the sun and the aircon is on.

PonyPatter44 · 07/04/2023 16:07

I always left mine in the car. She didn't die or catch fire, occasionally moaned and groaned a bit though. I would be more worried about the risk of opening the doors, getting her unstrapped, having to pay one-handed, then having to go through all that faff again to strap her back in. As long as there's no huge queue, I always felt it was safer to just leave her safely in the car, and run in to pay.

saltwater1985 · 07/04/2023 16:07

Always left mine in the car

MajorCarolDanvers · 07/04/2023 16:09

Always just left mine in the car.

I've been driving for 30 years.

I have never ever seen anyone carry a baby, or take a toddler or child into the shop.

They stay in the car.

Oakyloaky · 07/04/2023 16:09

Cannot recall any child ever dying in a car whilst parent paying for petrol. Far more hazardous carrying baby across the petrol station. Spilt petrol smelly and slippery,cars pulling out from pumps etc

HMW1906 · 07/04/2023 16:11

If there’s no queue and it’s not 25+ degrees outside and I can see the car the entire time then I’ll leave him in the car. If it’s a hot day or there’s a queue then I take him in with me.

Although in general i try to either go to pay at pump or go when I haven’t got my son with me.

minisoksmakehardwork · 07/04/2023 16:13

Had to leave mine in the car. Was no way I was traipsing newborn twins, a toddler and 4yo across the forecourt.

LumpySpaceGoddess · 07/04/2023 16:14

Myself and DH always took them in. Neither of us felt comfortable leaving them.

itsabigtree · 07/04/2023 16:15

FlowersAndBonnets · 07/04/2023 16:03

I would always take my baby, asleep or not. I think it’s neglectful not to.

But in what way is it neglectful?

The patent can see the from the kiosk and the baby is strapped in and locked.

FlowersAndBonnets · 07/04/2023 16:16

itsabigtree · 07/04/2023 16:15

But in what way is it neglectful?

The patent can see the from the kiosk and the baby is strapped in and locked.

Show quote history

You are neglecting their safety and putting them at risk.

Lots of scenarios can happen within a minute from fires to choking to kidnapping to the less extreme too.

MrsDoylesDoily · 07/04/2023 16:18

FlowersAndBonnets · 07/04/2023 16:16

You are neglecting their safety and putting them at risk.

Lots of scenarios can happen within a minute from fires to choking to kidnapping to the less extreme too.

Show quote history

But a million and one things could happen if you take them with you.

One isn't riskier than the other if you're going to pull extremities out of the air.

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